Have you tried the slob or lazy traits to see if they prevent or at least reduce cleaning? Not sure if there's a similar trait for cooking, but you could try the simple living lot challenge and then keep all the ingredients in your cook's personal inventory rather than the fridge. As for taking care of kids... only thing I can think of may not be acceptable to your storyline, but if the game doesn't recognize the father as the child's father but rather just a housemate, they'll be more likely to ignore said child.
For babies though, you'll still have to lock them in a room somewhere where only people you want caring for them can reach, otherwise every man, woman, and child on or near the lot will go check on them as soon as they cry.
