TEASER The Proclamation of Decoration Ned starts Ned: December's here! That means the Lord's birthday is right around the corner! Rod and Todd: Yay!! Ned: Get decorating, boys! We're gonna ...
ACT MAGGIE SPECIALSeems to Be the Hardest Word Pt. 1
January 2nd at 8am GMT if You Better Not Cry Pt. 1 wasn't started Moe starts
Moe: I guess I had to dump the petting zoo waste somewhere, but after what I did to the Comic guys place... even a black heart feels bad. Moe: I gotta fix what I did. And so there's no hard feelin's, l'll bring him some pickled eggs. Eggs make everything right.
Task: Make Moe Repair The Fortress of Lonelitude Task: Make Comic Book Guy Eat a Peace Offering Time: 4h Location: Fortress of Lonelitude Reward: 100 Event Currency 10 XP
Seems to Be the Hardest Word Pt. 2
Comic Book Guy starts
Comic Book Guy: My Fortress is looking most epic again and I'm feeling a deep sense of regret about trashing that yokel's distillery. Comic Book Guy: Or it could be indigestion. Comic Book Guy: Nevertheless, I shall fix said destruction and additionally offer him a vintage comic in “good” condition…. no “fair…” Comic Book Guy: Uggh. Maybe just a Crash Bandicoot key fob.
Task: Make Comic Book Guy Repair The Moonshine Shack Task: Make Cletus Pass Out Drunk Time: 4h Location: Moonshine Shack Reward: 100 Event Currency 10 XP
Seems to Be the Hardest Word Pt. 3
Cletus starts
Cletus: My head part's throbbin' and I'ze got a bad feelin' inside myself and it ain't a batch a sour moonshine. Cletus: I done wrong to that Reindeer truck and ‘til I'ze set what's wrong right. Cletus: Brandine won't lay with me. So we'ze stuck at just having just 32 younguns. That's sad.
Task: Make Cletus Repair The Reindeer Burger Truck Task: Make Krusty Cook with Roadkill Time: 4h Location: Reindeer Burger Truck Reward: 100 Event Currency 10 XP
Seems to Be the Hardest Word Pt. 4
Krusty starts
Krusty: That redneck roused something within me that I didn't know existed. Regard for someone else. Krusty: I'm gonna help Moe fix up his place. By which I mean I'm gonna get Sideshow Mel and Teeny to do the work. I'll smoke cigars and supervise.
Task: Make Krusty Repair The Exotic Petting Zoo Task: Make Moe Pocket a Peace Offering Time: 4h Location: Exotic Petting Zoo Reward: 100 Event Currency 10 XP
The Truth in the Tantrums
Moe starts
Comic Book Guy: Well I think we learned an important lesson today. Moe: That it's a dog-eat-dog world? Cletus: It's also a man-eat-dog world. Krusty: That rampant destruction is the best form of catharsis? Comic Book Guy: None of the above.
Task: Make Business Owners Steal Each Other's Customers Time: 8h Location: Exotic Petting Zoo (Cletus), Reindeer Burger Truck (Moe), Moonshine Shack (Comic Book Guy), Fortress of Lonelitude (Krusty) Reward: 100 Event Currency 10 XPPlay-Annoyed Grunt Pt. 1 (Maggie Not Owned)
Homer starts
Homer: This new Springfield's really coming along. And all our closest friends are here -- the Sea Captain, Comic Book Guy, the groundskeeper at the kid's school, Captain Macalister... Marge: I can think of one person who's still missing. Someone who should be living with us here in the house. Homer: You mean that kid Roy? Oh yeah, I wonder what happened with him and those two sexy ladies. Marge: No! I meant Maggie. Homer: Oh right, the kid who DOESN'T talk. She was always my favorite... for that very reason.
Task: Build Play-Dough Factory Reward: Maggie
Play-Annoyed Grunt Pt. 2 (Maggie Not Owned)
Marge starts
Marge: Maggie! You're finally here! How long has it been? Homer: From the looks of her overflowing diaper, quite a while. Homer: I'd change her but my phone is vibrating.
Task: Make Marge Change Maggie Time: 4h Location: Simpson House Requires: Maggie Task: Make Homer Pretend to Get a Phone Call Time: 4h Location: Simpson House
Play-Annoyed Grunt Pt. 1 (Maggie Owned)
Marge starts
Marge: Homer, did you stay up all night with Maggie watching Monkey Trauma Center? Homer: I had to. It was a twenty-four hour mission. Hate the game, not the character. Marge: I'm just worried that much TV might be bad for her. Maggie: *monkey noises* Homer: Yeah, maybe. But she has gotten good at picking the food crumbs out of my back hair. Lisa: According to this pamphlet that my school claims is a textbook, brain development is very important at Maggie's age. Lisa: She needs bright colors, simple tools, and non-toxic salty goop to play with and inevitably eat. Homer: Let me see that textbrochure. Hmm... glossy paper, full color, stock baby photos. That type of quality means it must be true!
Task: Build Play-Dough FactoryImaginary Friends Pt. 1
After completing Play-Annoyed Grunt Pt. 1 Marge starts
Marge: Maggie, I am so glad you're back. I'm sorry I misplaced you. Maggie: *Smiling* Marge: Tell you what… you play in your room while I take care of a few things around the house, and then we'll go out for a walk. Okay? Maggie: *Nods* Marge: Knock yourself out and have fun! Marge: Wait… maybe don't “knock yourself out.”
Task: Make Maggie Play in Her Room Time: 45s Location: Simpson House Task: Make Marge Clean-Up the House Time: 45s Location: Simpson House
Imaginary Friends Pt. 2
Marge starts
Marge: I see you're having fun! Playing with your imaginary friends? Maggie: *Smiles* Marge: Are they pink elephants? Magic fairies? A cross-eyed albatross? I don't know what's inside your head. Maggie: *suck* *suck* Marge: Oh well, I'm sure whatever they are they must be very special. Just like you. Maggie: *Smiles*
Task: Tap Imaginary Bears
Imaginary Friends Pt. 3
Auto starts
Task: Tap Imaginary Bears in a Friend's Town The End of the Beginning Pt. 1
After completing Imaginary Friends Pt. 3 Maggie starts
Maggie: *suck* *suck* Marge: Oh, you want to go for a walk with Mommy? That's one job I'd love to do! Bart: Wait, I'm sure I've seen you carrying her around town before. Marge: That was just a sack of flour. Lisa: And all those Mommy & Me classes? Marge: Also the flour. I needed to get out of the house. It's not easy taking care of a bag of flour twenty-four hours a day.
Task: Make Marge Take Maggie for a Walk Time: 8h Requires: Maggie
On job start:
Marge: It's so much nicer carrying a real baby than a flour baby. Finally I can show you off to all the gluten-free moms!
The End of the Beginning Pt. 2
Maggie starts
Maggie: *suck* *suck* Marge: Again? Sweetie, we just finished a walk five minutes ago. Maggie: *suck* *suck* Marge: If I wanted a job that took eight hours a day, I'd get one that paid. Marge: Just kidding. Who's ever heard of a "working mother"?
Task: Make Marge Take Maggie for a Quick Walk Time: 4h Requires: Maggie
The End of the Beginning Pt. 3
Maggie starts
Maggie: *suck* *suck* Marge: Ugh, Maggie -- I simply can't go on another walk with you. Maybe if there was a stroller in this game, or at least a Baby Bjorn. Marge: How about I get your Daddy to walk you instead? Homer: Sorry, I'm already busy watching Maggie. She's holding my beer and showing me this really interesting recipe for cookies. Marge: That's the bag of flour!
Task: Make Homer Spit Take Time: 6s
Homer: You tricked me, Flour Maggie. You'll rue this day... or should I say roux this day! Luigi: Hahahaha! That's-a funny-a one-a! Finally a joke-a for me, Luigi! Homer: Glad you liked it. I said it, but I don't get it.
The End of the Beginning Pt. 4
Lisa starts
Lisa: Mom, maybe you should enroll Maggie in daycare. Outsourcing our responsibilities as human beings is an American tradition. Marge: Let my kids be raised by someone else? Wouldn't that be acknowledging my failure as a mother? Bart: Can someone drive me down to the police station? Wiggum left the lens cap on when he took my mug shot last week. Marge: Then again, trying something new with parenting isn't always a bad idea.
Task: Make Marge Research Daycare Time: 8h Location: Simpson House Task: Build the Police Station Task: Make Homer Take Bart to Retake His Mug Shot Time: 8h Location: Police Station Requires: Bart
Marge: I had no idea how important daycare is for babies. Marge: Did you know that babies that don't attend daycare are 100% less likely to form memories in daycare?
The End of the Beginning Pt. 5
Marge starts
Marge: I didn't want to enroll Maggie in a daycare where all they do is paint, clap their hands and listen to music. Marge: But then I found out about preschools, where children learn to paint, clap their hands and listen to music. Lisa: But isn't preschool just the same thing as daycare? Marge: No sweetie, they have different names -- one which sounds like we're good parents, and one which sounds like we're lazy. Lisa: But they do the same things! The only difference is that daycare is a little bit cheaper. Homer: Cheaper, eh?
Task: Make Marge Apply to Preschools Task: Make Homer Apply to Daycares Time: 8h Location: Simpson House
The End of the Beginning Pt. 6
Marge starts
Marge: Maggie was too young for any of the schools I applied to. Marge: There's a bunch of elementary schools in this town, even a high school, but nothing for pre-K. Homer: We did get into the Stonecutter's Daycare, but that was a limited-time building from a long time ago. Almost no one's got it. Marge: There's only one thing to do. We need to build something new. Homer: Got it. I'll build the fire department -- you get the basket! Marge: That's not what I meant.
Task: Build Ayn Rand School for Tots
The End of the Beginning Pt. 7
Homer starts
Mrs. Sinclair: I'm sorry, but we can't accept your daughter Maggie. We received your application too late. Homer: Too late?! This place just came into existence! Mrs. Sinclair: If you loved your child, you'd have found a way around that. As it is now, our wait list is several years long. Marge: So I needed to apply when I was pregnant? Mrs. Sinclair: No, you needed to apply when you first signed up for ReadyToSettle.com. Homer: This is stupid! And I know stupid -- I'm the guy who blew up this town in the first place! Mrs. Sinclair: Are you threatening to let that happen again if I don't let Maggie into our school? Homer: I wasn't. Should I? Mrs. Sinclair: No, we would never kowtow to the threat of violence. We do however kowtow to the threat of stupidity. Mrs. Sinclair: The only way we can ensure someone with as dangerously inept a parent as yourself doesn't become dangerously inept herself is to educate her.
Task: Make Homer Mention Blowing up the Town Task: Make Maggie Start at Preschool Time: 8h Location: Ayn Rand School for Tots
Homer: Wow. My stupidity scares people into giving me what I want? I'm just like President Bush! Mrs. Sinclair: Bush isn't president anymore. Homer: He's not?! Is he king now? Mrs. Sinclair: Maggie can start today! Please, Mr. Simpson, just don't go to work.
The End of the Beginning Pt. 8
Moe starts
Moe: The IRS finally found out that I faked my own death, so I've got to call in all your bar tabs. Homer: Hey Moe, remember that time I blew up the town? Moe: No need to go crazy, Homer. I'll just make up a fake dependent I never see because my fake ex-wife got custody. Moe: How about Hazel? I've always wanted to lose custody of a Hazel.
Task: Make Homer Mention Blowing up the Town Time: 8h Location: Moe's Tavern Task: Make Moe Tear Up Homer's Bar Tab Time: 12h Location: Moe's Tavern
The End of the Beginning Pt. 9
Homer starts
Squeaky Voice Teen: Sir, you can't park there. Homer: Hey, did I ever tell you about the time I blew up the town? Sea Captain: Yarrr, we have a quota of five hundred shrimp per all-you-can-eat session. Homer: Blew Up The Town. Quimby: There is no possible way we can name a holiday after you! Homer: B.U.T.T.
Task: Make Sea Captain Cull the Sea for the Last of its Shrimp Time: 8h Location: Squidport Entrance Task: Make Quimby Name a Holiday After Homer Task: Make Homer Acronymize Acronyms Time: 8h If the user has Squeaky Voice Teen: Task: Make Squeaky Voice Teen Reroute Parade Time: 8h Location: Krusty Burger
Quimby: Close the banks! I pronounce today Homer Day! Homer: B.U… Quimby: The first in the eight day celebration we call Homerka!
The End of the Beginning Pt. 10
Homer starts
Homer: Mr. Burns! I demand a raise… as well as paid time off for Homerka, Rosh Homershana, and Simpsom Kipur. Homer: Keep in mind that I'm that guy who blew up the town, and that will make you say yes to me for some reason. Mr. Burns: No, you're the man who THINKS he blew up the town. The truth is you had nothing to do with it.
Task: Make Homer Do 10-Hour Spit Take Time: 10h Location: Control Building
The End of the Beginning Pt. 11
Homer starts
Homer: I distinctly remember destroying the town. There's even a video of it you can watch in the front of the store menu. Mr. Burns: Pish. You were at your workstation... or should I say "doesn't work"-station. Mr. Burns: I had it disabled years ago, on the recommendation of every other safety inspector at the plant. Mr. Burns: …What you've been working on is nothing more than a child's toy with spinny wheels and lights that blink when you push the big button. Homer: Oh!!! So THAT'S how you get the lights to blink.
Task: Make Homer Play at His Workstation Task: Make Maggie Teach Homer How It Works Time: 8h Location: Control Building
Console: Sing together, A, B, C... Console: You're the head of plant safety…
The End of the Beginning Pt. 12
Moe starts
Moe: One Duff beer for you and one Duff pureed beets for the baby. That'll be 12 dollars. Homer: Put it on my tab, and then rip up that tab unless you want me to blow up the town again. Moe: Nice try. Lenny and Carl overheard your conversation with Mr. Burns and told me all about it. Carl: Sorry, buddy. Slow news day. Homer: Thanks a lot! Just wait 'til everyone thinks YOU blew up the universe when YOU really didn't and YOU want to keep it a secret!
Task: Make Homer Drown His Sorrows in Beer Task: Make Maggie Drown Her Sorrows in Beets Time: 4h Location: Moe's Tavern
The End of the Beginning Pt. 13
Moe starts
Moe: So if Homer didn't blow up Springfield, who did? Homer: I guess we'll never know, unless someone who witnessed the events miraculously steps forward. Perhaps at this very moment... Maggie: *suck* *suck* Lenny: Hey, I think Maggie's trying to tell us something! Carl: Say it again slowly. Maggie: *suck* ... *suck* Moe: Okay, that didn't work. Why don't you just draw it on this napkin? Homer: So the one-eyebrowed baby blew up the town? How is that possible? Moe: Well, Maggie DID shoot Mr. Burns. And there's that baby that talks in the E*Trade ads. Kids today are precocious. Homer: We've got to go to Maggie's preschool and look for this evil baby.
Task: Make Homer Search for the Unibrow Bomber Task: Make Moe Tag Along Because He is Bored If the user has Lenny: Task: Make Lenny Tag Along Because He is Bored If the user has Carl: Task: Make Carl Tag Along Because He is Bored Time: 16h Location: Ayn Rand School For Tots
The End of the Beginning Pt. 14
Homer starts
Homer: Check out what I found in the Unibrow Baby's cubby. It looks like a manifesto! Lenny: I can't read this. It's all illegible crayon scribbles. Carl: The only thing I can tell for certain is that whoever wrote this is a deranged sicko. Moe: That's not the manifesto -- that's my memoir "Why Not Moe?". Moe: Here's the thing the baby wrote. Lenny: Oh, okay. This is much more legible. Homer: Who is this "ROSA"? Mr. Burns: You're not pronouncing it right! You need to roll the R. R-r-r-r-r-osa! Homer: Mr. Burns?! Why are you here? Mr. Burns: I'm looking for the nuclear plant's next Vice President of Operations. Homer: You mean I'm getting promoted? Mr. Burns: Get real, fopdoodle! This job requires someone more youthful and full of energy!
Task: Make Mr. Burns Recruit Babies to Work Time: 12h Location: Ayn Rand School for Tots
The End of the Beginning Pt. 15
Mr. Burns starts
Mr. Burns: This daycare is excellent! I haven't had such a steady supply of child labor since the plant did "Take Your Child to Work Month." Homer: Oh yeah, Maggie loved that "screw in tiny screws for an hour" game! Moe: Wait a minute! You force babies to do manual labor at the plant? Mr. Burns: I don't, no. That's why I built R.O.S.A. -- the Robotic Offspring-Sitting Automaton. Lenny: Oh right, that was the silver lady in the manifesto. Carl: Okay, enough explaining! Let's get back to reading it already. Moe: Wow, this R.O.S.A. looks like a real task-master, making those babies do her bidding. Homer: I would never let someone order ME around like that.
Task: Make Homer Go on a Job Time: 8h
The End of the Beginning Pt. 16
Homer starts
Homer: So Mr. Burns built a robot to exploit babies, one of the babies got mad, and the whole universe blew up. It all makes sense. Carl: None of that makes sense, Homer. Mr. Burns: Especially the part about my robot exploiting babies. She was incentivizing them! Mr. Burns: She gave them sugar to make them work, Benadryl to make them sleep, and donuts as a reward for a job well done. Homer: Mmm... donuts. Also, mmm... sugar and mmm... Benadryl. Lenny: It seems like we're still missing a piece of the story. Mr. Burns: Well, R.O.S.A. had a built-in nanny-cam. If we could recover her pieces, perhaps we could see what happened right before the explosion. Homer: *moans* I knew this was going to turn into collecting things.
Task: Find R.O.S.A Parts Time: 4h Location: Control Building Characters: Homer, Cletus, Lisa, Apu, Willy, Bart, Milhouse, Ned
Homer: We found a part! It looks like... a leg. Lisa: It's an arm, Dad. Homer: Nope. I'm pretty sure it's a leg. This robot must be tiny! Lisa: It is not tiny! That's an arm... Homer: Let's keep looking everyone, only a few parts to go! Almost there. Lisa: Yes, let's rebuild the tiny robot and find out what happened.
The End of the Beginning Pt. 17
Mr. Burns starts
Mr. Burns: We've found all the R.O.S.A. pieces except one... her feather duster. Lenny: What does she even have a feather duster for? She's a nanny, not a maid. Mr. Burns: Children get dusty too. But we need that piece -- it contains the surrogate motherboard. Carl: But it's impossible! We've looked everywhere! Moe: Everywhere in our MAIN Springfield. But there's one place we haven't looked... Lenny: Oh God, no. You don't mean... Moe: That's right. That place we dread... that haunts us in our nightmares... that we pretend doesn't even exist... Moe: Krustyland. Homer: Nooooooooooo!!!! Moe: Nooooooooooo!!!! Lenny: Nooooooooooo!!!! Moe: Let's just draw straws and get this over with.
Task: Make Homer Draw the Short Straw Time: 60s Location: Moe's Tavern Task: Build Krustyland Shuttlebus
The End of the Beginning Pt. 18
Homer starts
Homer: Woo-hoo! I drew the short straw so I don't have to go, and all you long straw guys are stuck going to Krustyland. Carl: That ain't the way drawing straws work, Homer. Homer: ARRGGGGHHH! Homer: Fine, I'll go. If the shuttle crashes on the way to Krustyland, tell Marge and the kids I died happy because I didn't make it to Krustyland.
Task: Go to Krustyland
The End of the Beginning Pt. 19
Homer starts
Homer: Ugh, this place is awful… and it's so far from Springfield. That shuttle bus took like 16 seconds! Homer: It's the only amusement park so boring that even the gangs won't come here!
Task: Make Homer Find the Last R.O.S.A Part A.S.A.P to Get Out of Krustyland Time: 4h Location: Krustyland Entrance
Homer: Bye, Krustyland. Forever this time. I'm serious. Squeaky Voice Teen: Would you like your hand stamped so you can re-enter? Homer: Has anyone ever asked to re-enter this place? Squeaky Voice Teen: No. Thank you for not punching me in the face for asking.
The End of the Beginning Pt. 20
Auto starts
Task: Go to Springfield
The End of the Beginning Pt. 21
Moe starts
Moe: Okay, we've assembled all the pieces. Let's turn this robot on. R.O.S.A: Hello, I am R.O.S.A. What can I do for you, mister? Moe: Ooh, mister. I like her already. Homer: We need to see your video from right before the explosion. R.O.S.A: Of course. Please enter the password. Homer: Password?
Reward: R.O.S.A Task: Make Homer Guess Mr. Burns's Password Time: 12h Location: Control Building
On job start:
Moe: Did you try "Excellent"? Homer: Yeah, it didn't work. Moe: Try "Excellent1". Homer: That's it! His catchphrase plus the year he was born.
The End of the Beginning Pt. 22
Homer starts
Homer: I'm confused. What were those things the one-eyebrowed baby put in R.O.S.A.'s battery compartment? Lenny: Fuel rods. You know, the things your job is to keep from overheating? Homer: Oh, that makes sense. Homer: Now that that's clarified, can you explain everything else that happened in the video? Carl: No. But if anyone asks me at a dinner party, I'm going to say yes so that people don't think I'm stupid. Moe: Regardless of whether that scene had a meaning or not, the important thing is that we spend hours debating it's meaning in the Tapped Out forums!
If the user has Lenny and Carl: Task: Make Lenny Argue Online That Maggie Created Skyfinger Task: Make Carl Argue Online it's a Retelling of the Genesis Myth Task: Make Moe Complain Online That the Game's Not Good Anymore Task: Make Homer Troll the Forum with Shirtless Selfies Time: 8h Location: Moe's Tavern
If the user doesn't have Lenny and Carl: Task: Make Lisa Argue Online it's a Retelling of the Genesis Myth Task: Make Bart Complain Online That the Game's Not Good Anymore Time: 8h Location: Simpson House Task: Make Moe Argue Online That Maggie Created Skyfinger Task: Make Homer Troll the Forum with Shirtless Selfies Time: 8h Location: Moe's Tavern
System Message: Way to go! You've finished the main quest line. Keep tapping bears and sending Maggie on jobs to collect pacifiers and unlock more prizes!
Play-Dough's Republic
Marge starts
Marge: Homer, where's Maggie? Homer: I dunno, she was right here before I went out for snacks. Homer: I wouldn't worry. She always comes back eventually. Marge: That's what you said about our first cat. Homer: Oh yeah... we better go find her then.
Task: Play "Where's Maggie?" Location: Playdough Factory Hiding Places: Simpson House, Cletus's Farm, Krusty Burger, Van Houten Home, Springfield Elementary, Springfield Library, Android's Dungeon, First Church of Springfield, Moe's Tavern, Police Station, Luigi's, Springfield Retirement Castle, Town Hall, Springfield Wax Museum, Ziff Corp Office Building, Purple House, Blue House, Pink House, White House, Orange House, Lard Lads Donuts You can play "Where's Maggie?" every 16 hours and if you find her 3 times you can get 1, 2 or 3 donuts!
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