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Have you disowned any family due to political conflict?

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  • 4junk3000
    5539 posts Member
    I don't know what to do anymore. I reopened the game as a peace offering, and she'll say stuff like "you're my good son", which is a comment she makes when she's mad at my younger brother (who's 30 and still lives at home) but then she'll follow immediately with "no collusion" which is her little pro-trump dig at me. I don't understand it.

    I've simply been ignoring her for the last week. I love my mom but i guess i can't be friends with her because she's become a petty fool.

    I'm just not going to reply anymore, unless it's some critical emergency. Yes, it makes me very sad. I really just don't even want to be here anymore. Seems most of the population is ok with letting civilized society crumble. I don't understand why it's too difficult to treat all people as you wish to be treated. We have the ability. But too many choose not to, and so we all suffer. It's not fair, that the evil can so easily override the good.
    "You're the most negative person I've ever seen on here. Constantly."
  • What I would say to encourage you to take heart is that all things come to pass.

    There have been plenty of periods in the past where people are devided, often caused by one political group or another. Once these periods are ended most of the normal people have reunions as all of a sudden what was once important becomes irrelevant.

    The same will be true of the very small orange man impersonating a POTUS.
  • annettemarc
    7747 posts Member
    edited March 2019
    Here's what works with my husband and i. I told him months ago that, every single time I think he's saying something political that is, in my opinion, absolutely idiotic, I will make this exact response:

    "Wow. That's brilliant, sweetie. I agree with you 100 percent."

    As long as I say those exact words, he knows exactly what I mean. Because I told him the exact lines ahead of time, months ago. If he says "well, what is it that you find idiotic?" I just say "what do you mean? I found it brilliant! I agree with you 100%". (Always sticking with those precise terms)

    It makes him nuts, and makes me happy.

    Who knows? This marriage might last another 43 years.

    Or not.


    In YOUR case I'd suggest something less blatantly insulting. Instead of telling her ahead of time, just start saying the same thing she said back at her.

    MOM: " Did you hear that Hillary Clinton is a Wicca and puts children into pizza ovens?"
    YOU: [nodding cheerfully] "You're absolutely right, Mom. Hillary Clinton is a Wicca and puts children into pizza ovens."
    MOM: Don't you think Sean Hannity is brilliant?"
    YOU: [nodding cheerfully] "You're absolutely right, Mom. Sean Hannity is brilliant."
    MOM: "Have you started watching Fox News?"
    YOU: [nodding cheerfully] "You're absolutely right, Mom. I've started watching Fox News."
    MOM: "Don't you think the Democrats are on a witch hunt against that wonderful Donald Trump?"
    YOU: [nodding cheerfully] "You're absolutely right, Mom. The democrats are on a witch hunt against that wonderful Donald Trump. "
    MOM: [eventually] "why are you suddenly agreeing with everything I say?"
    YOU: [nodding cheerfully] "You're absolutely right, Mom. I decided to suddenly agree with everything you say."
    MOM: [suspiciously] "Why?"
    YOU: [nodding cheerfully] "Because from now on i will say that everything you say is absolutely right. No matter what you say. No matter what I believe. I will say 'You're absolutely right, Mom.' Forever."


    Post edited by annettemarc on
    USA/UK Race To Throw Country Into Utter Chaos = TOO CLOSE TO CALL
  • 168sean168
    4038 posts Member
    Come to think of it, I want to correct my view that the people from where I am are apolitical. Most common people are always unhappy with the ruling party and yet it is the ruling party that continues to win. Some say it is likely due to the influx of new immigrants who will support the ruling party with their open policy.
  • Sean that almost sounds like you are starting to get political.
  • 168sean168
    4038 posts Member
    Sean that almost sounds like you are starting to get political.

    Yes I am actually one of the common people. My friend WhatsApp anti ruling party messages to me daily. But I don't really read them.
  • Yea I used to be really close with my cousins out in Texas who moved from CA, so that may explain thier views lol... They just got very pushy and started attacking me... They they got their 15 year old to start in with the insults. Long story short I havent talked to them for over 4 years now... It sucks but It is what it is. I just dont get the new generations though process. Attack or disown everyone who doesnt agree with you. It used to be I have my beliefs and you have yours and we respected that and we would joke and say "we'll get you back in 4 years"
  • 4junk3000
    5539 posts Member
    Idk if i can pin it on the "new generation" as my mom is an ex hippie turned racist xenophobe in her old age.

    And i would love to agree to disagree about just having our own beliefs, or a difference of opinion. But i refuse to be friends with someone that's willing to either say bigoted things, or repeat what i know are lies. Racism, misogyny, and lying are three things that have zero justification. So people with those "beliefs", i will not accept or respect.

    Is that ME being narrow minded because I won't accept someone's bigotry and xenophobia?
    "You're the most negative person I've ever seen on here. Constantly."
  • 4junk3000 wrote: »
    Idk if i can pin it on the "new generation" as my mom is an ex hippie turned racist xenophobe in her old age.

    And i would love to agree to disagree about just having our own beliefs, or a difference of opinion. But i refuse to be friends with someone that's willing to either say bigoted things, or repeat what i know are lies. Racism, misogyny, and lying are three things that have zero justification. So people with those "beliefs", i will not accept or respect.

    Is that ME being narrow minded because I won't accept someone's bigotry and xenophobia?

    I don't think you are being narrow minded at all since you have tried over and over to mend things with your mom. Either that or I am narrow minded too because I have zero tolerance for those things also. Most of my family are liberal minded people and the rest of them don't say much. Outnumbered, I guess. I have been unfriended by 1 long-time friend on Facebook though. Probably just as well because all of the fake, hateful propaganda he was posting was causing me a lot of anxiety.
    One thing you said that kind of jumps out at me is that her views sound like they have changed radically since she was younger. Is it possible that she is getting dementia?
    Anyway, you need to do whatever it is that keeps your mind healthy.
  • 4junk3000
    5539 posts Member
    If it were up to me, any American embracing xenophobia and white supremacy would be psychologically evaluated. Because i was taught to believe that America is a "melting pot". I was taught that the Statue of Liberty welcomes the " tired and poor, yearning to be free". I was taught that our govt values the separation of church and state, that our country has no national religion, and that we all have the freedom to follow whatever religion we want. So it definitely seems demented to me, when Americans talk this anti-muslim or anti-hispanic or anti-gay hate speech that is so clearly unamerican.

    I'm from a diverse area, I live in a diverse area now, and i have always understood that we must not blame an ethnic group, for the actions of an individual who may be of that ethnicity. These are what I've always heard are "American values", and these are what i thought made "America great". So when my mom is babbling about making America great again, I'm wondering what the heII she is referring to. Is it back to when brown people and women all kept their mouths shut and did what the white man said? Because that sure as heII ain't what i considered great. And I'm a white man!

    Yes i think what she says is just insane. But she's not alone, so proving it seems next to impossible. It's very depressing.


    Thanks everyone, who has replied recently. As much as I'd like to push this subject into the back of my mind, it's still very concerning. I don't want to be one of those people who loses a parent while they were at odds. So i try to keep the peace and maintain contact with the family back home. But too often it seems like I'm the only one who cares about it.

    😞

    "You're the most negative person I've ever seen on here. Constantly."
  • I may (hopefully) PM you at some point... until then... *hugs*
    Lately It Occurs To Me... What A Long Strange Trip It’s Been.
  • The Make America Great Again slogan is for anyone who doesn't remember how bad it was in the past. The new slogan is really "Get Out of the Way if You Don't Want Progress". EVERY country is for the young and the future young. We aren't born old and believing like your mother does. She has to know people like herself are on their way out. After all, the dinosaurs did die out eventually. Older people like your Mom won't be here forever. It's the people your own age who think like her are the ones you need to worry about. Do you ever wonder if she would rather have a son like these Proud Boys or Young Republicans that need to have speakers come to their colleges and cause protests and riots? Ask questions. See if she's actually getting anything important from the Trump/GOP or is she one of the many that never vote for their own self interests(jobs/tax breaks/health care/family leave,etc), they only vote because they're horrible people who just want to see other people suffer and it doesn't matter if the Right is actually helping them with their true needs.
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