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Love and War: Heaven and Hell Walkthrough

LPNintendoITA
11526 posts Member
edited February 21
Heaven and Hell Pt. 1

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Marge: What am I going to do? Temperance is falling for Artie. My beloved protagonist is going to end up with the wrong man!
Homer: Yeah, it's a literary catastrophe. So, what's for dinner?
Marge: Why are you even here? I told you that I would call YOU when I'm ready to talk.
Homer: I thought you WERE ready.
Marge: When did you think that happened? When you brought me a half-eaten box of chocolates or when you climbed naked into our bedroom window?
Homer: No, like many developments in our marriage, I thought it happened when I was at Moe's. I better go back and double-check.

Task: Collect Beer Barrels [x115]
Task: Make Marge Think of a Plan
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House or Brown House
Task: Make Homer Go to Moe's
Time: 4h
Location: Moe's Tavern, Moe's Express, O'Flanagan's Pub, The Gridiron or Brown House

Marge: Okay, so writing Cyrus into all this didn't help anything, but what more can I do? Those two were meant for each other.
Marge: I suppose I could try to write Cyrus out of the book… A bus comes out of nowhere? A gardening mishap? A garden comes out of nowhere?
Marge: I have no experience writing myself out of a corner. I need to talk to a professional!
Comic Book Guy: At your service.
Marge: Not you. I need to talk to Esme Delacroix!

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Heaven and Hell Pt. 2

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Esme Delacroix: So, Marge, how's the sequel coming?
Marge: I've hit a bit of a snag. My protagonist is about to fall for the wrong man. How can I make her see that she's making a mistake?
Esme Delacroix: Well, whenever I need to give my heroine a nudge in the right direction, I introduce a new villain. How many scoundrels are in your book?
Marge: Umm, just the one I suppose.
Esme Delacroix: One?! Oh, Marge, remember my rule of scoundrel thumb or "scumb": A scoundrel a chapter keeps your reader a captor.
Esme Delacroix: Just create a new villain who steals your protagonist away, only to be thwarted by your knight in shining armor.
Marge: That's really good advice! I can never thank you enough.
Esme Delacroix: It's fine if you just pay my consulting fee.
Marge: Yeah, that's what I meant when I said I can't thank you enough.

Task: Collect Beer Barrels [x115]
Task: Make Marge Get Back to Writing
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House or Brown House
If the user has Esme Delacroix: Task: Make Esme Delacroix Collect Her Fee
Time: 4h
Location: Books! Books! And Additional Books! or Brown House

Marge: Now, I just need to think up a new villain who can turn Cyrus back into the hero!
Marge: Of course! Captain Mordecai can come back. That's new! Okay here goes…
Marge: *types* Captain Mordecai, relentless in his search to track Temperance, stumbles across a small town. After docking his boat, he calls to a local fisherman…
Captain Mordecai: You there! What's the name of this hell-hole town?
Sea Captain: Yar, ye've docked at the bustling port of Springfield. What brings a fine specimen of captainhood like yerself here on this fine afternoon?
Captain Mordecai: I'm looking for some lost property. Perhaps you've seen her. About yea-high, easy on the eyes, with yardarm of ocean-blue locks.
Sea Captain: I know who ye be referring tee. Don't know where she resides but check the dive bar known as Moe's. Her husband is frequently seen thereabouts.
Captain Mordecai: Husband?! Be he a righteous fightin' man or a cowardly peewee?
Sea Captain: A pee wee he be.
Captain Mordecai: I see. Tee hee.

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Heaven and Hell Pt. 3

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Captain Mordecai: Which one of you lousy, soon-to-be-dead, slobgoblins calls himself Homer?
Homer: Ooh, somebody's in trouble. I'm sure glad my name isn't — hey wait, that's my name!
Captain Mordecai: So, you're the one who stole my wife from me? Not sure what she sees in you. Not much to look at.
Homer: I'll have you know that women say I'm a LOT to look at.
Captain Mordecai: Enough! Draw your sword. I'm gonna gut you like a fish for laying your hands on Temperance.
Homer: Temperance? Oh, you mean the other Marge. I never touched her.
Captain Mordecai: You mean my Temperance has been faithful to me?
Homer: Uh, well now I didn't say that.
Captain Mordecai: Then draw yer sword!
Moe: Hold on there, Popeye and Pinkeye. If youse are gonna fight to the death, there's a two-drink minimum.

Task: Collect Beer Barrels [x115]
Task: Make Homer Catch Captain Mordecai Up
Time: 4h
Location: Moe's Tavern, Moe's Express, O'Flanagan's Pub, The Gridiron or Brown House
If the user has Captain Mordecai: Task: Make Captain Mordecai Listen to Homer
Time: 4h
Location: Moe's Tavern, Moe's Express, O'Flanagan's Pub, The Gridiron or Brown House

Captain Mordecai: So you're having trouble with your wife, too?
Homer: Big time. She kicked me out.
Captain Mordecai: Women. Can't live with ‘em. Can't burn ‘em at the stake. Have you tried showing an interest in something she likes?
Homer: All the time! Marge likes me, and I show a lot of interest in myself.
Captain Mordecai: My Temperance loves whales. So, every so often, I go kill one for her. As a way to show her my love.
Homer: Hmm. Kill a whale for Marge. Are you Japanese?

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Heaven and Hell Pt. 4

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Marge: Now that Mordecai has been talking about Temperance, he's primed to find her. Then Cyrus will save the day and Temperance will go back to him.
Marge: Alright, time to get Captain Mordecai on the move.
Marge: *types* Captain Mordecai, feeling a renewed sense of purpose, prepares to set off to find Temperance…
Captain Mordecai: Homer, you have filled me with a renewed sense of purpose to find Temperance. Would you care to accompany me on my quest?
Homer: Right after this beer. And one more after that.
Captain Mordecai: What in the blazes?! Barkeep, the woman in the box there…make her louder!
Moe: Yeah, yeah. Keep your sword in its scabbard. *turns up TV volume*
Titania: So if you like what you see, come on down to Knockers. "For the wings", right? *winks at camera*
Captain Mordecai: By Neptune's whiskers. She'd make a mighty figurehead on my bow. Is that how maidens dress in this town?
Homer: Welcome to the twentywhateveritis century, Ahab. You should see what they wear in the yoga place down the block. They call them "tights" for a reason.
Captain Mordecai: Is it because they're tight?
Homer: Prob'ly.
Captain Mordecai: What are we waiting for? Yoga ho!

Task: Collect Beer Barrels [x155]
Task: Make Homer Go to a Yoga Studio
Time: 4h
Location: Downward Doghouse Yoga Studio or Brown House
If the user has Captain Mordecai: Task: Make Captain Mordecai Follow Homer
Time: 4h
Location: Downward Doghouse Yoga Studio or Brown House

Marge: Two can play at this game.
Marge: *furiously types* Captain Mordecai does NOT go to a yoga studio to ogle women! He turns around and resumes his quest to find Temperance…
Captain Mordecai: Homer, are you sure we shouldn't resume our quest to find Temperance?
Homer: You were the one who told me to show an interest in the same things that Marge likes...
Homer: Marge likes yoga, so we're going to watch yoga, and that's the ONLY reason we're going to watch yoga.
Marge: I would argue with him but none of this makes a bit of sense.

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Heaven and Hell Pt. 5

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Captain Mordecai: So…this is yoga?
Homer: Yep.
Captain Mordecai: Do they mind if we watch?
Homer: Maybe. But how do you explain all the piggy nose-marks on the windows?
Captain Mordecai: They all look like you made them.
Homer: Also, maybe. Either way, I think we better sign up.

Task: Collect Beer Barrels [x195]
Task: Make Homer Take In a Yoga Class
Time: 4h
Location: Downward Doghouse Yoga Studio or Brown House
If the user has Captain Mordecai: Task: Make Captain Mordecai Ogle Women
Time: 4h
Location: Downward Doghouse Yoga Studio or Brown House

Homer: My arms and legs feel so limber. That was great! I can see now why Marge comes here.
Captain Mordecai: I signed up for a year's membership!
Homer: You were right, Imaginary Weirdo. I have been taking Marge's needs for granted. Now I need to prove to her I'm willing to change and be a better man.
Captain Mordecai: Magnificent.
Homer: Are you listening to me or staring at the yoga pants again?
Captain Mordecai: Just magnificent.

Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
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