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A letter...(TL;DR included)

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I wouldn't worry about whoever the person is trying to sow discord here. Any animosity I felt toward them had turned to pity long ago. Much better to just be happy and merry, ignoring any petty insults that the person tries throwing out.

Replies

  • nick012345678900
    2272 posts
    edited January 2016
    I agree with Sakura. Just ignore who it is. All they want is attention.
  • mathumster385
    2436 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    Music, I think your loyalty to your friends here is really cool. I wish I'd discovered this place two years earlier. The longtime members seem to have a special connection. I'm a little jealous, but better late than not at all. I hope you continue to post TL;DR because I do have the time to read them.
  • RMVancleav710
    3533 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    Awww *hugs* MB!!! I always read your posts!!!! And yah just ignore this person whomever it is...
    crawl to the finish ID. socialdisa56
  • rosesgirlnz
    4091 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    Well said MB.
    *wonders if she missed more dramas*

    And Math, join on in, we make new connections all the time. I for one think you're pretty damn cool :D
  • MusicBooks960
    903 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    Ironically, Roses, before today I thought I had picked up on someone (not me this time!) being a jerk directly to you. Even if I was wrong about that (bad enough) I suggested (incorrectly) I knew who had been a jerk to you (much, much worse). Today's rant from me was meant to be a general apology to anyone I may have angered in the past couple of years, usually because I was being a *. Even more importantly though, I wished to point out how awesome (almost) everybody on this forum is.
    @Math, this is where it gets important. Roses is right. Anyone is welcome here, as long as they don't act like a tool.
    I'm going to point out something blatantly obvious, then I'm going to share a *Spoiler* about myself with you. You and I are both relative newcomers here, compared to some of the long-timers. That is of course, the obvious part.
    Here comes the part about me, that only a few of the people here might know and/or remember about me. Ready? Well, I hope you are, because here it is anyway:
    I found TSTO (and this forum) shortly before I stopped referring to my existence as "life". Due to a bunch unfortunate personal events, some my own fault (such as the toxic relationship I happened to be in at the time) to things no one had any control over (such as my father's slow and painful death) things went from bad to worse.
    I've always been an outsider anyways, but after the demise of the aforementioned relationship and my father's passing, I started to get much, MUCH, worse. I systematically built emotional defenses around myself, vowing I'd never let anyone get close to me again, all the while suffering crippling depression, exacerbated by severe alcohol abuse and my inability to find a new crappy job after quitting my previous crappy job. Suffice to say, I wasn't a complete basket case when I showed up on this forum, but I was getting there quickly.
    I'd like to flatter myself by thinking my goofy sense of humor played a part, but I don't think it really mattered.
    It was all due to the cool people on this forum.
    Despite all my inability to deal with people face to face on a daily basis, the fact that for my entire life I felt as though I had never really belonged anywhere, or even probability that I was just about unfit for a mental institution, these people accepted me. All I had to do was not be a total jerk to them (and truth be told, sometimes I have been).
    Over the past two years, the people of this forum have been kind (and persistent!) enough to wear down emotional barriers I myself had constructed around myself. That is why, despite my "No one is ever going to get close to me ever again, because otherwise I'm just going to get hurt again" **** attitude, and my (admittedly stupid) desire to remain a vague entity of ambiguous character, I consider these people my friends. That is why you now, like them, know more about me than people I've known in real life for the past few years. They are why I was able to tell this story.
    As a not-complete aside, Roses was also right about something else.
    Gabba gabba, we accept you, we accept you/
    one of us
    Gabba gabba, we accept you, we accept you/
    one of us.
    There. Now, even if you leave the forum, you're stuck taking us with you. :lol:
    I'm not including a TL;DR this time, even though this post totally was. If anyone skipped to the bottom expecting a summary from me, take a couple of minutes to go back and read this. I'm pouring my bitter heart out here, dammit.
  • suetopia
    4228 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    emoticon__hug_by_kuroiraine.gif

    I've really missed you MB.

  • mathumster385
    2436 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    Thank you, it means a lot. Now I need to go find a tissue.
  • MusicBooks960
    903 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    I'm glad it means a lot to you, Math. But that's also just how cool the other people around here are generally, regardless of how long they've been members of the forum. I would say Sakura has been here a long time, but I'm also pretty sure Nick was here before there was even a forum. :lol: (Also, thanks for the solid advice, you two!) I never even noticed, but RM and I joined at almost the same time (solid advice there, as well!). No matter when we joined, it's almost magical how well most of us get along with each other most of the time. If it is magic, I currently I blame Sue. :lol:
    We were all newer than someone else at one time or another. You're here now, and that's all that matters.
  • RMVancleav710
    3533 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    lol I was actually a lurker for my husband, he had been playing for almost a year longer than I did or maybe it was a year longer and he would send me out on quests to find information on here for him lol....but yes we have all missed the hell out of you MB, if only we can chain you to the basement and keep you here!! ;)
    crawl to the finish ID. socialdisa56
  • sandwedgeking
    2639 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    MusicBook's TL;DRs are best enjoyed with an adult beverage!

    I remember shortly after I joined there was a "Biggest TSTO Regrets" thread and I said not finding the forums sooner was mine - not only is it a source of game knowledge and insight, but the people were generally pretty nice and after frequenting OT, realized there were some great, kind, hilarious individuals to shoot the * with. I no longer think in terms of "forum regular" or post counts/join dates. If you're not a d1ck, you'll fit in just fine.

    As far as the trolls go, it took a long time to realize ignoring them IS the best course of action. I've engaged them on multiple occasions and while it's fun to say things like "Who ties your shoes in the morning?" and hit them with appropriate comments/quips and gifs, there's ultimately no point in doing so. Eventually the threads or posts get deleted, they are banned, and the frivolity continues.

    this-is-what-monday-feels-like.gif
    Stuff and Things - Designs by SWK
  • suetopia
    4228 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    @ Math - you are totally one of us!

    AHG2uMD.gif

    Edit: and for anyone else who wants to join in, please do! This forum is full of really great people. Doesn't matter if you are new or not!
  • mathumster385
    2436 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    Thanks, Sue. You guys have touched my heart, and I didn't how rewarding it could be to be part of a forum before I found this place. I'm so glad to be "one of us". Now, somebody say something silly because I'm starting to tear up again.
  • sandwedgeking
    2639 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    Chihuahuas-dance-of-seduction.gif
    Stuff and Things - Designs by SWK
  • Player_gghpflri
    44 posts
    edited January 2016
    Congratulations on becoming an official member of Lambda Lambda Lambda & Omega Mu's. You are now a honorary Tri-Lamb. Please ensure the Tri-Lamb theme song is learned prior to participating in the next CG event. Again, congratulations and good luck!
  • suetopia
    4228 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    Congratulations on becoming an official member of Lambda Lambda Lambda & Omega Mu's. You are now a honorary Tri-Lamb. Please ensure the Tri-Lamb theme song is learned prior to participating in the next CG event. Again, congratulations and good luck!

    I realize that you are upset and feel you have been wronged. And I'm sorry if what I said in another thread hurt you. I truly feel badly about that.


    Post edited by Unknown User on
  • moxxee
    7717 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    Great thread! :)

    You make a lot of great points, MB. We all deal with issues in different ways, and many of us use humor (humour in the case of some) as a defense mechanism, or use it as a way to enhance out enjoyment of life. Keep laughing, because of you stop, you might go crazy!!

    SWK is right about the troll(s). Narcissists need to be ignored to go away, but like MB said, the members here are accepting of anyone as long as you don't act like a tool. And this just doesn't happen here; it happens in any society or social setting. Humans don't like it when other people act like XpUNvnV.jpg... Plain and simple. Trolling has been a growing phenomenon as online social networking grows, but online shaming of said trolls has also grown as a way to reject their behavior.
    Interestingly, a person's online behavior can reflect a person's ability to create social relationships. If trolls struggle to make online connections, what kind of friends do they have in real life?

    The troll gets banned
    Troll makes 187th account.
    Troll tries to antagonize forum members.
    Realizes people already know who the person is and tries to escalate.
    Uses EA's "reset password" feature in an amateurish effort to try to intimidate.
    The troll gets banned.
    Troll makes 188th account.
    Troll tries to antagonize forum members.......

    *yawn*

    It gets old, so from now on I'm just ignoring it until it can act in a civilized manner, in harmony with current socially-accepted norms. But enough troll talk...

    As for the people who are civilized to each other, thanks for being a fun part of my life!
  • Taco_BeIIe
    2376 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    humour is the correct spelling BTW... :roll:
  • moxxee
    7717 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    Taco_BeIIe wrote:
    humour is the correct spelling BTW... :roll:

    Oh the horrour! :mrgreen:
  • smohqy
    2103 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    MusicBook's TL;DRs are best enjoyed with an adult beverage!

    Appropriately enough, I'm enjoying a pint-sized White Russian. At 9 in the morning. To my defense, I was up most of the night and am gonna nap soon and hard.

    Okay, you want a TL;DR? Here you go.


    MusicBooks, I know what you're saying about the welcoming and accepting nature of this forum. I have been a member of multitudes of forums, a lot of them full of trolls, and some of them specifically for dark humor. I fit in there as well, because I like a good-hearted sick joke, and I can sith-talk with the best of them. But a few of those communities also had a great sense of, well, community. I made many Friends that I've never met in real life, and quite a few that I eventually did. This place is much more family friendly, and I originally came here to learn more about the game, but it immediately felt so warm and friendly to me that I knew I was going to get much more than just game tips and awesome design pics. I'm creeping up on two years here, and I feel just like Math, in that I wish I would've found this place two years earlier.

    I'm sorry you're going through such a dark time in your life. I can't help you there, but I can say the future is full of wonder. I was always the one picked on in school. My blood disorder kept me from being athletic - which was no concern to me, I loved books and art - I was the shortest kid even through high school, and the few friends I had were also "rejects". I was on a first name basis with most of the trash cans in my schools, due to my being jammed in them on the regular. When I discovered music, I was blown away by its power. My 4th grade teacher would play an album side every Thursday. She loved Barry Manilow. She was gorgeous, and I had such a crush on her (she was in an Ice Capades commercial as well, oh how I loved when that came on the air), that I decided I loved Barry Manilow as well. My first album purchase was Even Now. I saved up, rode my bike to the Anaheim Plaza, and went straight to Musicland to buy it. I don't think I even stopped at Carrow's Nut House for my usual honeycomb fix.

    Junior high was rough as well. I did manage to make two friends, though. Both rejects like me. I was the scrawniness, shortest, and, because of my anemia, the yellowest. The very worst insult (to me, anyway), was when the two cutest girls in school (to me, anyway) called me Yellow Man. I capitalized it because it was so powerfully painful (I don't think I've ever typed it out before now, but I feel it needed to be capitalized). One of my friends was the fattest, and the other, the dorkiest, most acne-riddled kid you could imagine. My dad died when I was in seventh grade, from this blood disorder, and that devastated me beyond imagining. Cue depression. Cue writing dark poetry. Cue high school.

    High school. Ran into a friend I'd met in the first grade. That helped me a bit through the crazy scary first days. Made a new friend as well, also short, but much more charasmatic and confident. Yay, I thought, things are looking up! Then the first school paper was printed. Front page article was about us. Mentioned by name, then dubbed us Mr. Pee and Mr. Wee. Said we needed a ladder to open our bottom lockers. Not a good start. Cue more depression. More dark poetry. Then my sister died. The darkness got even darker. A friend committed suicide. Even darker.

    Cue Mtv. Music videos became a soothing balm to me. I particularly liked a video by a band called Styx. Mr. Roboto. I could totally relate to the hiding behind a mask. I shed my Manilow love ( I still have all the LPs, though), and turned to rock and roll. Then it was The Doors and Pink Floyd. With the help of music, art, and books (I love your name, by the way), I made it through high school. I started feeling a little more comfortable in this world.

    High school ended in 1986. In 1987, I discovered the Grateful Dead. Within a few months, I was surrounded by non-judgmental, open-minded people. I grew into myself and my confidence soared. I was creating great art, my list of Friends grew long, and the depression pretty much left. Not totally. I'll always have that dark cloud hanging over me, waiting for any reason to rain down on me.

    The year after Jerry died, I met my now wife, the most amazing girl in the world. Life was beautiful (except for the whole Jerry dying part. That still hurts). I proposed to her three years to the day after our first date. We decide on a year and a half engagement. Four and a half years together, that should be pretty sure. Eight months before the wedding, my mom suffers, and dies from, one of the most evil brain cancers known. Cue depression. But I fight this depression. Because I've lived, I've learned that life will do this. Constantly. I'm in love, and my mom loved MolzPink. That's the greatest endorsement anyone can get in this world.

    We married barefoot on the grass in her mom's backyard while a hippie jamband played Van Morrison's Into the Mystic. They also played Duke Ellington's Take the A Train in memory of my parents, and we danced the grass down to the dirt.

    Many years later, many movies, many concerts, many years going to Burning Man, many many many comfortable silences together, a beautiful daughter, now eight years old, many meals, many smiles - and many tears - here I am. Happy.

    So happy.


    Why am I telling you all this? I don't know. Was it MusicBook's heartfelt outpouring? Quite possibly. Was it the White Russian? I'm sure that helped. But mostly, I think it is the sense of community I feel here. This place is amazing.

    MusicBook, go easy on yourself. You're good people, I sense that from your posts. And we're good people, too. Otherwise I would just read these forums for tips and tricks, not participate. I feel at home here, and so should you. I know it's cliche, but things do get better. In fact, sometimes they get downright beautiful.


    Okay, naptime.

    Peace, Love, and Light, everypeople.

  • SakuraNeko08
    3531 posts Member
    edited January 2016
    ^that post makes MB's post look like one sentence... :shock:

    Also TL: DR, but I'm sure it was good. :lol:
    There is no way to happiness - happiness is the way. Thich Nhat Hanh

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