Re: Battlefield VD eluxe edition or deluxe edition upgrade
The way the Deluxe Edition purchase appears in Manage Game is going to be the base Battlefield V game with the Deluxe Edition Upgrade (10MB DRM key file). This is completely normal. There is no separate "deluxe" version of the game. If you look in the store, it shows you that the purchase of the Deluxe Edition bundle includes the base game and the deluxe edition upgrade file. This applies to just about any bundle that a game has where there is a pre-order bonus or upgraded version.
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It's my estimation that it is appearing in the store as not purchased because you didn't directly purchase it through the store and used the BF1 game to get that discount. It is similar to if you had purchased a digital code for the game from a 3rd party vender and redeemed that code instead of making a direct purchase from the Xbox store. You technically bypassed the Xbox Store and purchased through the BF1 game which is considered separate.
There is nothing to worry about this. I am seeing the exact same thing you describe as I also purchased the Deluxe Edition through the BF1 menu.
As you stated in the OP, you can confirm that your order was placed by viewing your order history when logged into your Microsoft account here: https://account.microsoft.com/billing/orders
You should have also received a confirmation email of your order from Microsoft to your registered email address.
You should have no problems with the game when the release occurs on the November 14th 11 PM EST. It should come out of the pre-ordered state after downloading a DRM file to update the game as available to play. Good luck.
See you on the Battlefield.