I wish only to be heard.

I plan to contact EA customer service to verify my options, if it transpires that I have any; I outline below what I would like to choose to do below, and invite advice on the matter.

Even Balance have issued me a global ban for a violation, namely "gamehack #83016". They have also denied my appeal with the standard copy-paste message.

I am innocent, but I am not going to waste time expecting this assertion to make any difference.

I am a forty year-old IT engineer, a mild Asperger, and an avid gamer with nearly 3,000 hours of (fairly average) BF4 gameplay invested. It has taken me several days to move through my feelings as my routine has been disrupted, my name besmirched, my integrity cast into doubt, and my investment of time and money summarily trashed. I've been in an apoplexy of indignant rage while supporting a server/network installation for sixty hours this week at an event in The Savoy Hotel, London, on minimal sleep and with my primary stress outlet abruptly denied me.

I am hardly incapable of expressing myself under normal circumstances, but it's difficult to put into words just how awful this has been or how much it has hurt me. It would seem like a waste of time anyway. I've finally got my head back on straight, and I have a statement:

I don't think I want to waste more money re-buying anything and starting anew. Even Balance have effectively burned my entire Battlefield collection (so much time and money, I could cry) but I haven't played anything but Battlefield 4 since its release. As long as Battlefield 5 doesn't end up using PunkBuster, I'll probably still take the plunge on that as I love Battlefield and would have made the jump anyway, I expect (pending review, at least).

I don't want to change my account or create a new one either, regardless of the ban being associated with it. I've got more than just Battlefield on it, and Even Balance can choke on one if they think they can burn all of that, too. It would be cheaper to buy a ticket to Texas than to replace them all, so I'm going to keep my account and all my games. I might not be able to play Battlefield 4 online again, but I'm proud of my soldier and I'm keeping it on record.

I can't see how this has happened but I'm already sick of thinking about it, and nothing further is my responsibility to explain. I have two-factor authentication enabled now (and would have taken advantage of this feature already if I'd been paying attention), so I'm going to just shake it off; I won't be ashamed of this blemish any more than any victim should be ashamed of their scars, and a victim I am in spite of those who might regard my proclamation with scepticism. I am innocent, and the only people who matter already know that.

I'm certainly not happy about my (semi-static) home IP address being publicly paraded on walls of shame via third (third) parties. It gives me even more reason to be utterly disgusted about this, but I'll be onto my ISP about it as necessary- time for a new one, I guess.

PunkBuster  has been a part of my life, constantly, since the day Wolfenstein:ET came out- a necessary compromise to which I have rarely paid much heed. No more though, as I shall henceforth avoid anything that uses software related to EvenBalance or their services. I shall continue to play your multiplayer games (EA) without cheating or hacking, and without so much as playing in a manner that I might find unfair, not because I fear punishment (which comes regardless, it seems) but because that is the only way I believe one should play.

It really wouldn't be fun any other way.

I am not going to let this experience colour my ongoing gaming adventures or indulge myself in petty bitterness. I'll just vote with my feet and advise others likewise. I've lost more than a little faith in Even Balance's system and methods, especially as real cheats (who appear to care little for the accounts they use) are not effectively curtailed by them.

The ones I hold truly to blame for this? The cheats themselves, both for spoiling online games, and for making necessary such measures as prove this disruptive and heart-breaking when things go wrong. I do not believe in hell, but I can think of numerous special places for their kind.

I appreciate the opportunity to state my case, and I welcome any advice that may be offered. I politely request that nobody bother to explain an inability to overturn bans by third-party services. I'd much prefer to know that this will be the end of this, and that I can indeed make the choices I've expressed herein without further persecution or insult to my integrity, or indeed, further loss of my purchases. If not, what would be a better course of action?

If there is nothing more that I can do about it, I wish only to move on. If there is something I can or should do, please enlighten me.