"It Doesn't Get Much Worse Than This (A Haruo/River Homeless Story)
Chapter One; (Part One)
"The Other Shoe Drops"
Homeless; it’s a word that conjures up fear in its most primal form. You are exposed, vulnerable. You have no succor from the stress of whether you are going to live to see the sun rise. And the rising of the sun is cold comfort for it only brings about yet another long day, sometimes fruitless of looking for food; the very nutrients that serve to sustain you in this miserable existence. The rain beats down on you as you sleep; you are always cold and at the mercy of the elements.
People always say that it’s bad life choices that brings the threat of homelessness. But that is only true for the drug addicts and winos (chronic alcoholics - because EA censors that other word).
Not every homeless person has met his current situation at the pointy end of a needle filled with psychotropic drugs or by staring down the bottom of an alcohol bottle in a bleary haze to kill the pain.
Circumstances: a lost job because the owner thinks of his workers as checks and balances against a spreadsheet and needs to lose a few expenses to buy his next Mercedes (a penny saved is a penny earned, so they say); overwhelming grief over a beloved spouse lost to a life-threatening illness or an unfortunate accident that consumes the surviving spouse in a haze of unresolved what-ifs and wondering if it is worthwhile to even go on any longer after one loses the one person in their life that meant everything to them (they just give up on life); a landlord looking to renovict or turnover tenants, jacks up his rental rates to the point where his tenants have no place to go other than the streets because the other landlords seeing him jack up his rents causes them to jack up theirs in turn in order to compete.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zTnhwqp9S2g/YM-Qh_7gprI/AAAAAAAApTc/7ImgckQ6RcUEwoG9kXg6ioh3gCdJeGqvQCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-2.jpg
Life is cutthroat and it appears that there is no room in the pillars of success for those who have empathy. Because very few have it in them who are in a position to help those who suffer and very few are willing to stick their necks out for those who are less fortunate than they are.
For me and my wife, it was the last. Our last landlord decided to jack my rents up to over §1200 a month and thus we were forced to find our next accommodation on a 5x5 plot of land somewhere in countryside. Because law enforcement will tell you to move along, you’re at their mercy. If you get a good cop, you’ll get off with a warning against loitering. If you get a bad one, you’ll get a ticket that since you’re homeless and you don’t have any money to pay it off other than by pan-handling and diving in dumpsters trying to look for things to sell for a quick simoleon, you end up a criminal and get hauled off to the cooler or Crowbar Hotel for a few until they deem you rehabilitated to the point where they feel you won’t be a menace to society just for trying to survive. Society can be a real bastard to those just trying to survive. So far we’ve been lucky enough to run into the cops who are nice enough to just tell us to be on our way and not make our life any harder than it is. But they’ve also told us that there are some bastards who will go out of their way to ticket you and make your life tough just for their own shits and giggles.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-I4VI5EvqMeo/YM-Q9wkBlhI/AAAAAAAApTk/Xrhbxv5LbZwDSg5Qoss3yCffz7txdQnTQCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-4.jpg
Let’s not get into how society treats those who are unfortunate enough to be both homeless and disabled. Both River and I are able-bodied. We can work, we can rummage through things and make ends meet, however it’s always a narrow line between trespassing and survival. The shop-keepers don’t like us rummaging through their stuff and the cops are always on our ass telling us to begone and don’t scare the paying customers who if they are willing enough will toss us a few simoleons so that we can buy a bite to eat. We mostly survive on fruits and vegetables that are one day from going bad thanks to the magnanimity of a shop-keeper who was once homeless himself and knew exactly what we’re going through.
Not everyone is capable of working in those money-making positions. Everyone has their strengths. Those who haven’t found theirs yet haven’t had the luck in their life to get a chance to know what they truly are good at. And mainly that’s due to finances. The almighty simoleon. You need to be able to have money to get the post-secondary education to put yourself in a position where you can find out what it is that you’re truly good at; if you don’t you’re destined for scudwork and being at the mercy of your boss’s magnanimity. If he likes you, you’re ok till he doesn’t like you. If you don’t have the simoleons, you don’t have power; buying or control over the course of your own destiny.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Y2lKVH3T-1M/YM-RiAwBrTI/AAAAAAAApTs/dVV3ShZT6wkimNqsssQu2SJxPteAzBYiACLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-30.jpg
For us, we knew we needed to find shelter; the 10x10 plot of land that we were occupying wasn’t enough to build anything on and the only thing that we could put on it was a bench that one could nap on for a few hours at a time, taking turns. I don’t believe that anyone could get a decent night’s sleep. And breaking in anywhere such as the firestation to use their facilities was an absolute no-no. So...we had nowhere else other than to fish for our food and hope the conservation officers wouldn’t catch us because that would yet be another §5000 fine that we couldn’t pay. Loitering was §250.
The instant we found ourselves homeless the more we found that money, food and shelter were the primary things that were the most important, whether it came from hustling those who had money (pan-handling) or digging through the dumpsters for things to sell. I hadn’t gotten desperate enough to steal a car yet. And hopefully I never get to that point. It certainly wasn’t a situation I would wish on anyone at all. River and I were starting to get to know all the places where we could find free food – on the trees, which would allow us to at least take the edge of the constant hunger that we had. It would also give us extra food that didn’t go bad at least – it would be eaten long before it went bad. At least it was something and water was free, at least until Nestle decides to monetize it so that only the rich would be able to consume it and the rest of us are condemned to drink polluted water like those in the third world.
Unfortunately it seems in this world that everything is monetized up to and including life itself. Insurance companies end up offering you coverage based on how much they think you’re worth and it can be a real eye-opener when it comes to that. You think you can earn about $2.5M over the course of your life time at a certain wage per hour, well your insurance company things you can only earn about 2/3rds of your calculation and bases your insurance payout based on that while jacking up your life-insurance monthly payments to them. And the company life insurance that River and I had, well, we lost it the moment that they fired us for being homeless. So frankly the idea that it’s all drugs and bad choices that lead to homelessness is a load of horse manure and compassion is in short supply.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Fzg6Jue246k/YM-SMcMbi5I/AAAAAAAApT0/4N5DbS_F7n0qaGVYI3vzHIzZcaBzn5Y7QCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-3.jpg
River and I stood for a long moment wondering how it all came to this. The simple fact that we found out via letter that our rent went from §900.00 to §1200.00 and the rent was payable on the first of the month which was in three days. Our savings were minimal since we had to eat and pay for our car expenses (gas and insurance) which came out in total to about §225.00. And at that job, my wife was making $1100.00 and I was making §975.00 which meant an influx of §2075/mo. On top of that. Being billed for cable and internet which ran us around §260.00/mo did not leave us very much at the end of it all. And now we had §0.00 income. So when you did the math, §2075 less §900 for rent less §225 for car insurance and the minimal gas that we could get and less §260.00 for cable and internet for the minimal enjoyment that we could get out of that since River and I didn’t go out to the movies or eat out much at all; in total came out to what was left of §690.00 which barely fed both of us including lunches and dinner. So frankly when the bill came that they were raising the rent by §300.00 it took half our food budget right off the table.
It’s easy to say well, cut your internet and cable. But to deny someone any sort of enjoyment of life and condemn them to drudging through life without anything to keep them from going stark-raving insane (all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy) is what is known as psychological torture. We only live once and what enjoyment we get in life is what gets us through the day. It is easy for those who already have life’s good stuff to say, “Deny yourself this, get rid of the internet, get rid of your cell phone. It’s eating money you can’t afford.” It’s another thing for them to have done it; and when they complain about how high their bills are and you ask them, “Well, why don’t you get rid of that second home that you own, or your secondary car? “Well...I need that second car? Do you really? Or, “I need the income from the secondary home...”. Well, if it’s going to be such a drain on your resources, then why do you have it anyways? Why not get rid of it and just save the money and put it away in an investment somewhere where it will grow money?” “No, I can afford it...”
Well then quit complaining about how high your bills are then; just shut up and pay it. You put yourself into that position, now quit complaining. Oh wait... You don't like that kind of attitude directed at you, do you? See you want sympathy. See what I mean about the road going both ways? The answer is because they don’t want to cut their expenses even if they know that they'll save money that way. They get too much enjoyment out of being able to be able to complain and whine about their financial situation because they wanted to keep up with the Joneses whereas those who have need of their internet because of their situation is fixed that they need it because society is changing. They have been placed in a position where they aren’t able to function without the internet in their home. Everybody now uses online-banking, everybody no longer uses payphones, jobs expect e-mailed resumes, they no longer want you to walk into their place of business and hand them a paper resume. The paper resume goes directly into the circular bin. So what’s the choice. The libraries don’t want you to upload files through their computers for fear of viruses. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. These are the thoughts that run through River’s and my head as we sit here in the rain wondering what our life has come to.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TjCJVGXSUho/YM-S6SIJanI/AAAAAAAApT8/k0cM1LDkGdoBn34Sk2IPFnxf84eX1lUfwCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-52.jpg
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MS1ZqYXjlrY/YM-S6smudzI/AAAAAAAApUA/ES4vqu4p4u0vKCnQCp17TavtPI7DyYFuwCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-53.jpg
“Well, at least we have our cellphones, right, honey?” I say sardonically to my wife.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ZfjQilHxKf8/YM-TSsoGwgI/AAAAAAAApUM/W3P6cF-blPsw34Ahteun6cWfz0PQET_rgCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-51.jpg
River lets out a sarcastic snort of laughter (or was it a bitter snort? A flash of anger goes through me as I see that her faith in humanity is wavering). At least her humor is still intact. I love my wife. She’s the one that’s carrying me through this. If I didn’t have her, I’d be lost in a state of depression so deep I wouldn’t be able to see the other end of this.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8hCUK1_0cko/YM-TuPoSc1I/AAAAAAAApUU/iRalnn1VGIM8vGQgTEx8dy-W5CCzGs8bACLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-54.jpg
The only thing that we can do is hide out in our tent and hope to hell that the rain lets up in a couple of hours so that we could go out food hunting in the community gardens. And frankly the fact that the rain is keeping the summer temperatures down is a godsend.
TO BE CONTINUED...
"The Other Shoe Drops"
Homeless; it’s a word that conjures up fear in its most primal form. You are exposed, vulnerable. You have no succor from the stress of whether you are going to live to see the sun rise. And the rising of the sun is cold comfort for it only brings about yet another long day, sometimes fruitless of looking for food; the very nutrients that serve to sustain you in this miserable existence. The rain beats down on you as you sleep; you are always cold and at the mercy of the elements.
People always say that it’s bad life choices that brings the threat of homelessness. But that is only true for the drug addicts and winos (chronic alcoholics - because EA censors that other word).
Not every homeless person has met his current situation at the pointy end of a needle filled with psychotropic drugs or by staring down the bottom of an alcohol bottle in a bleary haze to kill the pain.
Circumstances: a lost job because the owner thinks of his workers as checks and balances against a spreadsheet and needs to lose a few expenses to buy his next Mercedes (a penny saved is a penny earned, so they say); overwhelming grief over a beloved spouse lost to a life-threatening illness or an unfortunate accident that consumes the surviving spouse in a haze of unresolved what-ifs and wondering if it is worthwhile to even go on any longer after one loses the one person in their life that meant everything to them (they just give up on life); a landlord looking to renovict or turnover tenants, jacks up his rental rates to the point where his tenants have no place to go other than the streets because the other landlords seeing him jack up his rents causes them to jack up theirs in turn in order to compete.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zTnhwqp9S2g/YM-Qh_7gprI/AAAAAAAApTc/7ImgckQ6RcUEwoG9kXg6ioh3gCdJeGqvQCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-2.jpg
Life is cutthroat and it appears that there is no room in the pillars of success for those who have empathy. Because very few have it in them who are in a position to help those who suffer and very few are willing to stick their necks out for those who are less fortunate than they are.
For me and my wife, it was the last. Our last landlord decided to jack my rents up to over §1200 a month and thus we were forced to find our next accommodation on a 5x5 plot of land somewhere in countryside. Because law enforcement will tell you to move along, you’re at their mercy. If you get a good cop, you’ll get off with a warning against loitering. If you get a bad one, you’ll get a ticket that since you’re homeless and you don’t have any money to pay it off other than by pan-handling and diving in dumpsters trying to look for things to sell for a quick simoleon, you end up a criminal and get hauled off to the cooler or Crowbar Hotel for a few until they deem you rehabilitated to the point where they feel you won’t be a menace to society just for trying to survive. Society can be a real bastard to those just trying to survive. So far we’ve been lucky enough to run into the cops who are nice enough to just tell us to be on our way and not make our life any harder than it is. But they’ve also told us that there are some bastards who will go out of their way to ticket you and make your life tough just for their own shits and giggles.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-I4VI5EvqMeo/YM-Q9wkBlhI/AAAAAAAApTk/Xrhbxv5LbZwDSg5Qoss3yCffz7txdQnTQCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-4.jpg
Let’s not get into how society treats those who are unfortunate enough to be both homeless and disabled. Both River and I are able-bodied. We can work, we can rummage through things and make ends meet, however it’s always a narrow line between trespassing and survival. The shop-keepers don’t like us rummaging through their stuff and the cops are always on our ass telling us to begone and don’t scare the paying customers who if they are willing enough will toss us a few simoleons so that we can buy a bite to eat. We mostly survive on fruits and vegetables that are one day from going bad thanks to the magnanimity of a shop-keeper who was once homeless himself and knew exactly what we’re going through.
Not everyone is capable of working in those money-making positions. Everyone has their strengths. Those who haven’t found theirs yet haven’t had the luck in their life to get a chance to know what they truly are good at. And mainly that’s due to finances. The almighty simoleon. You need to be able to have money to get the post-secondary education to put yourself in a position where you can find out what it is that you’re truly good at; if you don’t you’re destined for scudwork and being at the mercy of your boss’s magnanimity. If he likes you, you’re ok till he doesn’t like you. If you don’t have the simoleons, you don’t have power; buying or control over the course of your own destiny.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Y2lKVH3T-1M/YM-RiAwBrTI/AAAAAAAApTs/dVV3ShZT6wkimNqsssQu2SJxPteAzBYiACLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-30.jpg
For us, we knew we needed to find shelter; the 10x10 plot of land that we were occupying wasn’t enough to build anything on and the only thing that we could put on it was a bench that one could nap on for a few hours at a time, taking turns. I don’t believe that anyone could get a decent night’s sleep. And breaking in anywhere such as the firestation to use their facilities was an absolute no-no. So...we had nowhere else other than to fish for our food and hope the conservation officers wouldn’t catch us because that would yet be another §5000 fine that we couldn’t pay. Loitering was §250.
The instant we found ourselves homeless the more we found that money, food and shelter were the primary things that were the most important, whether it came from hustling those who had money (pan-handling) or digging through the dumpsters for things to sell. I hadn’t gotten desperate enough to steal a car yet. And hopefully I never get to that point. It certainly wasn’t a situation I would wish on anyone at all. River and I were starting to get to know all the places where we could find free food – on the trees, which would allow us to at least take the edge of the constant hunger that we had. It would also give us extra food that didn’t go bad at least – it would be eaten long before it went bad. At least it was something and water was free, at least until Nestle decides to monetize it so that only the rich would be able to consume it and the rest of us are condemned to drink polluted water like those in the third world.
Unfortunately it seems in this world that everything is monetized up to and including life itself. Insurance companies end up offering you coverage based on how much they think you’re worth and it can be a real eye-opener when it comes to that. You think you can earn about $2.5M over the course of your life time at a certain wage per hour, well your insurance company things you can only earn about 2/3rds of your calculation and bases your insurance payout based on that while jacking up your life-insurance monthly payments to them. And the company life insurance that River and I had, well, we lost it the moment that they fired us for being homeless. So frankly the idea that it’s all drugs and bad choices that lead to homelessness is a load of horse manure and compassion is in short supply.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Fzg6Jue246k/YM-SMcMbi5I/AAAAAAAApT0/4N5DbS_F7n0qaGVYI3vzHIzZcaBzn5Y7QCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-3.jpg
River and I stood for a long moment wondering how it all came to this. The simple fact that we found out via letter that our rent went from §900.00 to §1200.00 and the rent was payable on the first of the month which was in three days. Our savings were minimal since we had to eat and pay for our car expenses (gas and insurance) which came out in total to about §225.00. And at that job, my wife was making $1100.00 and I was making §975.00 which meant an influx of §2075/mo. On top of that. Being billed for cable and internet which ran us around §260.00/mo did not leave us very much at the end of it all. And now we had §0.00 income. So when you did the math, §2075 less §900 for rent less §225 for car insurance and the minimal gas that we could get and less §260.00 for cable and internet for the minimal enjoyment that we could get out of that since River and I didn’t go out to the movies or eat out much at all; in total came out to what was left of §690.00 which barely fed both of us including lunches and dinner. So frankly when the bill came that they were raising the rent by §300.00 it took half our food budget right off the table.
It’s easy to say well, cut your internet and cable. But to deny someone any sort of enjoyment of life and condemn them to drudging through life without anything to keep them from going stark-raving insane (all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy) is what is known as psychological torture. We only live once and what enjoyment we get in life is what gets us through the day. It is easy for those who already have life’s good stuff to say, “Deny yourself this, get rid of the internet, get rid of your cell phone. It’s eating money you can’t afford.” It’s another thing for them to have done it; and when they complain about how high their bills are and you ask them, “Well, why don’t you get rid of that second home that you own, or your secondary car? “Well...I need that second car? Do you really? Or, “I need the income from the secondary home...”. Well, if it’s going to be such a drain on your resources, then why do you have it anyways? Why not get rid of it and just save the money and put it away in an investment somewhere where it will grow money?” “No, I can afford it...”
Well then quit complaining about how high your bills are then; just shut up and pay it. You put yourself into that position, now quit complaining. Oh wait... You don't like that kind of attitude directed at you, do you? See you want sympathy. See what I mean about the road going both ways? The answer is because they don’t want to cut their expenses even if they know that they'll save money that way. They get too much enjoyment out of being able to be able to complain and whine about their financial situation because they wanted to keep up with the Joneses whereas those who have need of their internet because of their situation is fixed that they need it because society is changing. They have been placed in a position where they aren’t able to function without the internet in their home. Everybody now uses online-banking, everybody no longer uses payphones, jobs expect e-mailed resumes, they no longer want you to walk into their place of business and hand them a paper resume. The paper resume goes directly into the circular bin. So what’s the choice. The libraries don’t want you to upload files through their computers for fear of viruses. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. These are the thoughts that run through River’s and my head as we sit here in the rain wondering what our life has come to.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TjCJVGXSUho/YM-S6SIJanI/AAAAAAAApT8/k0cM1LDkGdoBn34Sk2IPFnxf84eX1lUfwCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-52.jpg
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MS1ZqYXjlrY/YM-S6smudzI/AAAAAAAApUA/ES4vqu4p4u0vKCnQCp17TavtPI7DyYFuwCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-53.jpg
“Well, at least we have our cellphones, right, honey?” I say sardonically to my wife.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ZfjQilHxKf8/YM-TSsoGwgI/AAAAAAAApUM/W3P6cF-blPsw34Ahteun6cWfz0PQET_rgCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-51.jpg
River lets out a sarcastic snort of laughter (or was it a bitter snort? A flash of anger goes through me as I see that her faith in humanity is wavering). At least her humor is still intact. I love my wife. She’s the one that’s carrying me through this. If I didn’t have her, I’d be lost in a state of depression so deep I wouldn’t be able to see the other end of this.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8hCUK1_0cko/YM-TuPoSc1I/AAAAAAAApUU/iRalnn1VGIM8vGQgTEx8dy-W5CCzGs8bACLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Screenshot-54.jpg
The only thing that we can do is hide out in our tent and hope to hell that the rain lets up in a couple of hours so that we could go out food hunting in the community gardens. And frankly the fact that the rain is keeping the summer temperatures down is a godsend.
TO BE CONTINUED...
