Moe's Ark: Premium Walkthrough
Day Old Donuts Gil starts Gil: Ol' Gil's got a real sweet treat for you today, Springfield. Gil: Day Old Donuts! Homer: Mmm... donuts. Lisa: You're not really planning to eat those stale donu...
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Kill Burns Pt. 1
Homer starts
Homer: That Mr. Burns is a real piece of work!
Marge: Homie, don't talk ill about your boss in front of Maggie.
Homer: I'm sorry Maggie, but even babies should know Mr. Burns is a jerk. He needs to be taught a lesson.
Marge: Mr. Burns will get what's coming to him, but not from any of us. Right Maggie?
Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Task: Make Butterfly Maggie Energize and Fly
Time: 12h
Smithers: Who's there?
Butterfly Maggie: *suck*
Smithers: Maggie Simpson! How'd you get in here?
Butterfly Maggie: *suck*
Smithers: And since when can you do that? Easy now. Just put the sword down.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Smithers: No! I won't betray Mr. Burns. He'll be long gone by the time you find him.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Kill Burns Pt. 2
Lenny starts
Lenny: It's bad enough we work for that jerk. Now he owns the beer we drink.
Carl: Burns won't stop until he owns everything and everyone.
Moe: Youse guys don't know what you're talkin' about, alright. Burns ain't so bad once he's paying you.
Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Moe: Hey! No babies allowed after 1 PM. That's when the drunks show up.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck*
Task: Make Butterfly Maggie Trash Moe's Bar
Time: 4h
Location: Moe's Tavern
Moe: What have you done to my precious, dirty, leaky bar?
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Moe: Alright, I'll spill. Burns was here, he said he was gonna see Krusty next. Now lemme sweep up my booze and get it back into bottles.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Kill Burns Pt. 3
Krusty starts
Krusty: What do you mean we're out of meat patties? Just use the mystery junk Burns dropped off.
Maggie: *suck*
Krusty: It's you! Look, Burns and I help each other out. I scratch his back, he gets Smithers to scratch mine.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Krusty: Okay, calm down. Don't pop your pacifier. I do remember Burns saying something about going to the Kwik-E-Mart.
Task: Make Butterfly Maggie Investigate the Kwik-E-Mart
Time: 6s
Location: Kwik-E-Mart
Apu: Baby Maggie! You cannot be near my toxic hot dogs and suspect burritos unsupervised.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck*
Apu: I am sorry, but I do not understand your adorable baby noises.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Apu: However, if you were asking for the whereabouts of Mr. Burns, he is at the Power Plant. You just missed him.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Kill Burns Pt. 4
Mr. Burns starts
Mr. Burns: What was that? Is someone there? Ah, it's you. Smithers warned me of your crusade.
Butterfly Maggie: *intense suck* *enraged suck*
Mr. Burns: Your diaper gives you great confidence. But I have more. Do your worst, baby.
Task: Make Butterfly Maggie Get Revenge on Burns
Time: 4h
Location: Control Building
Mr. Burns: Please, take mercy on this withered old man.
Butterfly Maggie: *remorseful suck*
Mr. Burns: Ha, while you fell for my mercy ploy, it allowed me time to fall into my trap door.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Mr. Burns: See you around, you layette loser!
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Kill Burns Pt. 5
Homer starts
Homer: Mr. Burns! What are you doing in my house!?
Mr. Burns: Simpson, help me stop your murderous infant or you're fired.
Homer: Maggie? She's just a harmless baby.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck* *suck* *suck*
Homer: Where did you learn to swear like a safety inspector? Oh, wait.
Mr. Burns: She's going to kill me, Simpson! Stop her!
Task: Make Butterfly Maggie Reach Max "I Have The Power!" Status
Time: 8h
Homer: Maggie, people say mean things about their bosses all the time. That doesn't mean we want to kill them.
Homer: It just means that we wish they were dead.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *cries* *suck*
Homer: But I am proud you tried to take revenge on Mr. Burns in my honor. That's my girl.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck suck* *suck* *suck suck*
Mr. Burns: If you no longer try to kill me, I shall forget this misunderstanding, and be marginally nicer to your father.
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
Sarah Wiggum Promo
Gil starts
Gil: Not taking the bait? I'm the one on the hook, line, and sinker this time.
Gil: Ol' Gil's going to be sleeping with the fishes for real.
On offer accepted:
Gil: I may have been washed up, but my aquarium critters don't have to be!
Gil: We're all having sushi tonight!
On offer declined:
Gil: Ol' Gil's luck is turning around. Larry Kidkill is reopening the zoo. I'll betcha baboons to beluga whales I can sell him the Aquarium.
Gil: You can't have a zoo without Ol' Gil or fish gills!
Family Fun Pt. 1
Sarah Wiggum starts
Ralph: Happy Christmas, mama!
Sarah Wiggum: Ralph, Christmas isn't until the end of the year when Santa comes.
Ralph: I thought Santa came every night, laid on our couch and ate cheese balls.
Sarah Wiggum: That’s your Daddy, sweetie.
Ralph: I already got you a present -- my long hair. I just can't get it off my head.
Sarah Wiggum: Let me help you.
Task: Make Sarah Wiggum Cut Ralph's Hair
Time: 8h
Requires: Ralph
Task: Reach Level 26 and Build the Wiggum House
Sarah Wiggum: We are supposed to go to the Aquarium for family day. Where is your father?
Ralph: He’s at the North Pole with his reindeer!
Sarah Wiggum: Let’s just go with that. Mommy has to pick up some things at the store. Be good, sweetie.
Ralph: ‘Cause Santa will find out!
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Family Fun Pt. 2
Sarah Wiggum starts
Sarah Wiggum: Is this all the wine you have, Apu?
Apu: I may have more boxes of wine in the back.
Sarah Wiggum: Just to be sure, I better buy it all.
Apu: Are you throwing some kind of huge party?
Sarah Wiggum: Just the opposite. I'm buying up all the wine before my AA meeting tonight.
Sarah Wiggum: Just knowing it’s here is torture. After I buy it can you flush it down the toilet?
Apu: That will be the first thing down my toilet for a good cause!
Task: Make Sarah Wiggum Drink Boxed Wine
Time: 12h
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Family Fun Pt. 3
Sarah Wiggum starts
Sarah Wiggum: Is that you, Marge? I barely recognized you.
Marge: Lisa and Homer got me a gift card to Jake's. They said I work too hard and deserved it. Isn't that sweet!?
Sarah Wiggum: Oh, look. Clancy and Ralph just texted me saying the same thing. I work hard and deserve it too.
Marge: I didn't hear your phone ding.
Sarah Wiggum: I do work hard, I do! I do! I do!
Task: Make Sarah Wiggum Visit Jake's Unisex Hair Palace
Time: 1h
Location: Jake's Unisex Hair Palace
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Family Fun Pt. 4
Wiggum starts
Wiggum: Hey honey, how was your day?
Sarah Wiggum: Where have you been? We were supposed to go to Family Fun day at the Aquarium!
Wiggum: That's today? I thought that was one of those things we talk about but never do.
Sarah Wiggum: I can't believe you can just forget like that, Clancy.
Wiggum: I'll make it up to you, Poppin’ Fresh. We can go to the Aquarium right now!
Task: Make Wiggum Family Go to Aquarium
Time: 4h
Location: Springfield Aquarium
Sarah Wiggum: This has been a perfect day with my two little angels. Time for a family photo!
Ralph: Oh look, the sea cows are wrestling!
Wiggum: Hey, they have ice cream bars shaped like little penguins!
Sarah Wiggum: Clancy? Ralph? Where did you run off to?
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Family Fun Pt. 5
Wiggum starts
Wiggum: Guh! They taste like actual penguins. Sarah?! Ralph?! Where are you? Better fire a few rounds so they can find me.
Squeaky Voice Attendant: You shot the Yum Yum fish tank! You can't have weapons in here, you're banned for life!
Wiggum: I'm the law. You can't ban me. I can only ban myself! So… Chief Wiggum, you're banned!
Ralph: The water pandas taught me how to slide on my tummy. They're my Mommy and Daddy now!
Sarah Wiggum: There you two are!
Wiggum: I knew you'd recognize the sound of my gun.
Sarah Wiggum: Actually I followed the trail of dead fish to you.
Task: Make Sarah Wiggum Go Home in Shame
Time: 4h
Location: Wiggum House
Task: Make Wiggum Go Home With Pride
Time: 4h
Location: Wiggum House
Task: Make Ralph Go Home in Ignorance
Time: 4h
Location: Wiggum House
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
Atlantis
Auto starts
Milhouse: Look, Bart! It's Atlantis, the lost city!
Milhouse: I want to marry a mermaid. Let's go check it out!
Bart: You go ahead. I don't do fish or girls.
Milhouse: Fine, then you're not invited to our underwater wedding.
Task: Make Milhouse Fail to Find a Bride in Atlantis
Time: 4h
Location: Atlantis
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Spoon is Mightier Than the Sword Pt. 1
Knifey Spooney starts
Knifey Spooney: My first-time stateside. A lot smaller than I expected.
Knifey Spooney: I gotta find a good spot to grab a bevvie.
Task: Make Knifey Spooney Drink at Moe's
Time: 12h
Location: Moe's Tavern
Task: Reach Level 15 and Build Moe's Tavern
Knifey Spooney: This snake pit reminds me of my favorite bottle-o back home! America ain't so bad.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Spoon is Mightier Than the Sword Pt. 2
Knifey Spooney starts
Knifey Spooney: The perfect bottle-o of scum and villainy. But can't spend my whole trip drinkin'. Gotta see the sights.
Snake: Not so fast, crocodile skin. Fork over your money, or you'll be tasting my cold steel knife!
Knifey Spooney: You call that a knife?
Task: Make Snake Confront Knifey Spooney
Time: 4h
Location: Moe's Tavern
Task: Make Knifey Spooney Intimidate Snake With His Spoon
Time: 4h
Location: Moe's Tavern
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Spoon is Mightier Than the Sword Pt. 3
Snake starts
Snake: Dude, that's not fair! Where’d you get a spoon that big?
Knifey Spooney: It's not a spoon. Now this, this is a knife.
Knifey Spooney: Now I believe one of us was about to hand over all their money.
Snake: I think I hear my jail cell calling me. Bye!
Knifey Spooney: That bloke deserves a good bootin'. Good thing I don't leave home without mine.
Task: Make Knifey Spooney Patrol Springfield Wearing the Boot
Time: 4h
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Spoon is Mightier Than the Sword Pt. 4
Auto start
Bart: You're that weird guy we met in Australia. What are you doing here?
Knifey Spooney: Oh right, you're the kid that almost started a war.
Bart: Wars are easy. Homework is hard.
Knifey Spooney: If you say so, kid. Say, you up for a game of Knifey Spooney?
Bart: When am I not?
Task: Make Knifey Spooney Challenge Bart to a Game of Knifey Spooney
Time: 4h
Location: Brown House
Task: Make Bart Play a Game of Knifey Spooney
Time: 4h
Location: Brown House
Bart: C'mon, you gotta give me a chance to break even. Best out of 67!
Knifey Spooney: I think you've had enough.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Spoon is Mightier Than the Sword Pt. 5
Knifey Spooney starts
Knifey Spooney: No one in this town can challenge me at Knifey Spooney?!
Bart: I take offense to that.
Ned: I might be able to give you a fun-run for your money.
Knifey Spooney: This muzzy-lipped bloke is a joke, right?
Ned: You're sportin’ a cookie duster from down under yourself there, whisker mister!
Task: Make Knifey Spooney Challenge Springfielders to a Game of Knifey Spooney
Time: 4h
Location: Brown House
Task: Make Ned Dominate at a Game of Knifey Spooney
Time: 4h
Location: Flanders House
Knifey Spooney: This bloke's bottling his blood's worth! I'm bodgy compared to you. You have to teach me your ways.
Ned: I've got my first disciple! Follow me on the path to Ned-leousness knowledge.
Ned: First thing: recite the Lord's prayer backward while sortin’ knives and spoons in the silverware drawer.
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
Three-Eyed Whale
Auto starts
Smithers: Sir, is that whale another result of chemical spillage from the plant?
Mr. Burns: Nonsense, Smithers. I may drip but my plant nor I have any spillage issues.
If the user has Mr. Burns: Task: Make Burns Be in Denial of Three-Eyed Whale
Time: 4h
Location: Squidport Entrance or Control Building
Task: Tap Three-Eyed Whale
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
3:10 to Yo Yo Pt. 1
Yo Yo starts
Yo Yo: Can you believe it!? We are in the human world, the Toad Spirit must have teleported us here.
Lisa: Oh my gosh, Yo Yo! You're real!? And you speak English! Springfield English!
Yo Yo: Yes, we are very real but from another plane of existence. We have to catch the worm train back home.
Lisa: I don't know where worm trains come from, but good luck!
Task: Make Yo Yo Give Kangee a Snack
Time: 4h
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
3:10 to Yo Yo Pt. 2
Yo Yo starts
Yo Yo: Excuse me, strange being, have you seen a worm train?
Moe: Who youse calling strange? And leave my worms outta this!
Yo Yo: Uh-oh, Kangee, I think we upset it. We best be going.
Moe: And don't come back!
Moe: Unless it's family night at the bar, then bring your whole crew. It's a fun time for everyone.
Task: Make Yo Yo Bound Around to Find Worm Train
Time: 4h
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
3:10 to Yo Yo Pt. 3
Yo Yo starts
Yo Yo: Mister, have you seen the worm train?
Grampa: What the...? A flying Kangaroo! When I was in the war I flew a bunch of different animals... a jackrabbit...
Yo Yo: Oh, look at that, I actually think I see the worm train over there. Gotta go, bye!
Task: Make Yo Yo Avoid Grampa
Time: 4h
Location: Krusty Burger
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
3:10 to Yo Yo Pt. 4
Cletus starts
Cletus: Brandine, you see what I'm seeing?
Yo Yo: Kangee is pretty isn't she?
Cletus: Pretty tasty! We goin' eat good tonight.
Brandine: I'll fire up the stew pot!
Yo Yo: Hurry, Kangee, get us out of here!
Task: Make Yo Yo Escape Cletus
Time: 4h
Location: Brown House
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
3:10 to Yo Yo Pt. 5
Yo Yo starts
Yo Yo: Kangee, look! The worm train! We can finally go home!
Lisa: Yo Yo, wait! I've seen how the movie ends. You can't go back to your time. Besides, Springfield isn't so bad.
Yo Yo: Based on my experience, it's a pretty bad place. And I need to save Aunt Ginzee from the Toad Spirit.
Lisa: You never liked her anyway. Besides, what if she's happy with the Toad Spirit?
Yo Yo: She does make me brush my teeth before bed and got me socks for my birthday. You're right, she's the worst!
Lisa: Give Springfield another chance. We arrest people who give bad gifts!
Task: Make Yo Yo Give Springfield Another Chance
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Yo Yo: This might just be a good fit for us, Kangee. If we can avoid the people trying to kill and eat us.
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
Giant Lobster Scorpion
Auto starts
Willie: Look at the size of ya. You'd be a tasty treat on Willie’s dinner plate. That’s if Willie ate off dinner plates.
Squeaky Voice Attendant: Uh, Sir, you can't eat the Lobster Scorpion.
Willie: This crusty groundskeeper will eat any crustacean he wants. Now outta my way!
Task: Make Willie Try to Eat a Lobster Scorpion
Time: 4h
Location: Giant Lobster Scorpion
Task: Tap Giant Lobster Scorpion
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Tower of Babel
Auto starts
Ned: That, boys, is one of man's greatest mistakes. They tried to build a tower to heaven.
Rod: I want to go to heaven! Let's climb it!
Ned: No Rod, you diddly don't. The Lord dealt out a mighty powerful punishment on the people who built this tower.
Rod: Being punished is my favorite hobby!
Ned: Then your punishment is no punishment!
Task: Make Ned Be Condescending About Tower of Babel
Time: 4h
Location: Tower of Babel
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Rosh Hashanah Pt. 1
Rabbi Krustofsky starts
Rabbi Krustofsky: God, I was thinking, we never have guests over.
God: I wouldn't be able to walk around in my robe if we had guests, Krustofsky. You know I like my alone time.
Rabbi Krustofsky: How about just one guest? I would love to see my son.
God: Oh my Me. I can't say no to that face. Fine. But only for one day.
Task: Make Krusty Go to Jewish Heaven
Time: 4h
Location: Jewish Heaven
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Rosh Hashanah Pt. 2
Auto starts
Rabbi Krustofsky: It's good to see you again, son! I've missed you.
Krusty: Hi, Dad. Hey-Hey, God. What's the kid doing here?
Jesus Christ: S’up?
God: Trying to get him away from video games. Jesus, put the controller down!
Jesus Christ: Whatever.
Rabbi Krustofsky: Krusty, I'm glad you're spending New Year's Day with me. Did you bring my Shofar?
Krusty: It’s right in my big clown pocket!
Task: Make Krusty Blow His Shofar
Time: 4h
Location: Jewish Heaven
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Rosh Hashanah Pt. 3
Auto starts
God: It's time for you to go, Krusty.
Rabbi Krustofsky: I hate saying goodbye.
Krusty: Tell ya what, how about we eat some Krusty Burgers together before I go?
Rabbi Krustofsky: Guess I can't get any deader. Sure.
Task: Make Krusty Share a Last Meal
Time: 4h
Location: Jewish Heaven
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Rosh Hashanah Pt 4
Auto starts
Devil Flanders: Hottily-hoodily, underground neighborino! Welcome to H-e-double bent paper clips!
Krusty: What the-? How did I end up here? God said he was sending me home.
Devil Flanders: I'll bet he didn't specify which home. Pull up a pitchfork and get poking.
Krusty: I have to get out of here!
Task: Make Krusty Try to Escape Jewish Hell
Time: 4h
Location: Jewish Heaven
Krusty: This clown can't stay down. You gotta get me back up to Springfield.
Devil Flanders: What do I get by letting you go?
Krusty: I'll give you the souls of everyone who eats a Krusty Burger.
Devil Flanders: They have to eat AND digest it.
Krusty: Guh. That’s asking a lot.
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
Homer starts
Homer: That Mr. Burns is a real piece of work!
Marge: Homie, don't talk ill about your boss in front of Maggie.
Homer: I'm sorry Maggie, but even babies should know Mr. Burns is a jerk. He needs to be taught a lesson.
Marge: Mr. Burns will get what's coming to him, but not from any of us. Right Maggie?
Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Task: Make Butterfly Maggie Energize and Fly
Time: 12h
Smithers: Who's there?
Butterfly Maggie: *suck*
Smithers: Maggie Simpson! How'd you get in here?
Butterfly Maggie: *suck*
Smithers: And since when can you do that? Easy now. Just put the sword down.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Smithers: No! I won't betray Mr. Burns. He'll be long gone by the time you find him.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Kill Burns Pt. 2
Lenny starts
Lenny: It's bad enough we work for that jerk. Now he owns the beer we drink.
Carl: Burns won't stop until he owns everything and everyone.
Moe: Youse guys don't know what you're talkin' about, alright. Burns ain't so bad once he's paying you.
Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Moe: Hey! No babies allowed after 1 PM. That's when the drunks show up.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck*
Task: Make Butterfly Maggie Trash Moe's Bar
Time: 4h
Location: Moe's Tavern
Moe: What have you done to my precious, dirty, leaky bar?
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Moe: Alright, I'll spill. Burns was here, he said he was gonna see Krusty next. Now lemme sweep up my booze and get it back into bottles.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Kill Burns Pt. 3
Krusty starts
Krusty: What do you mean we're out of meat patties? Just use the mystery junk Burns dropped off.
Maggie: *suck*
Krusty: It's you! Look, Burns and I help each other out. I scratch his back, he gets Smithers to scratch mine.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Krusty: Okay, calm down. Don't pop your pacifier. I do remember Burns saying something about going to the Kwik-E-Mart.
Task: Make Butterfly Maggie Investigate the Kwik-E-Mart
Time: 6s
Location: Kwik-E-Mart
Apu: Baby Maggie! You cannot be near my toxic hot dogs and suspect burritos unsupervised.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck*
Apu: I am sorry, but I do not understand your adorable baby noises.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Apu: However, if you were asking for the whereabouts of Mr. Burns, he is at the Power Plant. You just missed him.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Kill Burns Pt. 4
Mr. Burns starts
Mr. Burns: What was that? Is someone there? Ah, it's you. Smithers warned me of your crusade.
Butterfly Maggie: *intense suck* *enraged suck*
Mr. Burns: Your diaper gives you great confidence. But I have more. Do your worst, baby.
Task: Make Butterfly Maggie Get Revenge on Burns
Time: 4h
Location: Control Building
Mr. Burns: Please, take mercy on this withered old man.
Butterfly Maggie: *remorseful suck*
Mr. Burns: Ha, while you fell for my mercy ploy, it allowed me time to fall into my trap door.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck*
Mr. Burns: See you around, you layette loser!
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Kill Burns Pt. 5
Homer starts
Homer: Mr. Burns! What are you doing in my house!?
Mr. Burns: Simpson, help me stop your murderous infant or you're fired.
Homer: Maggie? She's just a harmless baby.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *suck* *suck* *suck*
Homer: Where did you learn to swear like a safety inspector? Oh, wait.
Mr. Burns: She's going to kill me, Simpson! Stop her!
Task: Make Butterfly Maggie Reach Max "I Have The Power!" Status
Time: 8h
Homer: Maggie, people say mean things about their bosses all the time. That doesn't mean we want to kill them.
Homer: It just means that we wish they were dead.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck* *cries* *suck*
Homer: But I am proud you tried to take revenge on Mr. Burns in my honor. That's my girl.
Butterfly Maggie: *suck suck* *suck* *suck suck*
Mr. Burns: If you no longer try to kill me, I shall forget this misunderstanding, and be marginally nicer to your father.
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
Sarah Wiggum Promo
Gil starts
Gil: Not taking the bait? I'm the one on the hook, line, and sinker this time.
Gil: Ol' Gil's going to be sleeping with the fishes for real.
On offer accepted:
Gil: I may have been washed up, but my aquarium critters don't have to be!
Gil: We're all having sushi tonight!
On offer declined:
Gil: Ol' Gil's luck is turning around. Larry Kidkill is reopening the zoo. I'll betcha baboons to beluga whales I can sell him the Aquarium.
Gil: You can't have a zoo without Ol' Gil or fish gills!
Family Fun Pt. 1
Sarah Wiggum starts
Ralph: Happy Christmas, mama!
Sarah Wiggum: Ralph, Christmas isn't until the end of the year when Santa comes.
Ralph: I thought Santa came every night, laid on our couch and ate cheese balls.
Sarah Wiggum: That’s your Daddy, sweetie.
Ralph: I already got you a present -- my long hair. I just can't get it off my head.
Sarah Wiggum: Let me help you.
Task: Make Sarah Wiggum Cut Ralph's Hair
Time: 8h
Requires: Ralph
Task: Reach Level 26 and Build the Wiggum House
Sarah Wiggum: We are supposed to go to the Aquarium for family day. Where is your father?
Ralph: He’s at the North Pole with his reindeer!
Sarah Wiggum: Let’s just go with that. Mommy has to pick up some things at the store. Be good, sweetie.
Ralph: ‘Cause Santa will find out!
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Family Fun Pt. 2
Sarah Wiggum starts
Sarah Wiggum: Is this all the wine you have, Apu?
Apu: I may have more boxes of wine in the back.
Sarah Wiggum: Just to be sure, I better buy it all.
Apu: Are you throwing some kind of huge party?
Sarah Wiggum: Just the opposite. I'm buying up all the wine before my AA meeting tonight.
Sarah Wiggum: Just knowing it’s here is torture. After I buy it can you flush it down the toilet?
Apu: That will be the first thing down my toilet for a good cause!
Task: Make Sarah Wiggum Drink Boxed Wine
Time: 12h
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Family Fun Pt. 3
Sarah Wiggum starts
Sarah Wiggum: Is that you, Marge? I barely recognized you.
Marge: Lisa and Homer got me a gift card to Jake's. They said I work too hard and deserved it. Isn't that sweet!?
Sarah Wiggum: Oh, look. Clancy and Ralph just texted me saying the same thing. I work hard and deserve it too.
Marge: I didn't hear your phone ding.
Sarah Wiggum: I do work hard, I do! I do! I do!
Task: Make Sarah Wiggum Visit Jake's Unisex Hair Palace
Time: 1h
Location: Jake's Unisex Hair Palace
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Family Fun Pt. 4
Wiggum starts
Wiggum: Hey honey, how was your day?
Sarah Wiggum: Where have you been? We were supposed to go to Family Fun day at the Aquarium!
Wiggum: That's today? I thought that was one of those things we talk about but never do.
Sarah Wiggum: I can't believe you can just forget like that, Clancy.
Wiggum: I'll make it up to you, Poppin’ Fresh. We can go to the Aquarium right now!
Task: Make Wiggum Family Go to Aquarium
Time: 4h
Location: Springfield Aquarium
Sarah Wiggum: This has been a perfect day with my two little angels. Time for a family photo!
Ralph: Oh look, the sea cows are wrestling!
Wiggum: Hey, they have ice cream bars shaped like little penguins!
Sarah Wiggum: Clancy? Ralph? Where did you run off to?
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Family Fun Pt. 5
Wiggum starts
Wiggum: Guh! They taste like actual penguins. Sarah?! Ralph?! Where are you? Better fire a few rounds so they can find me.
Squeaky Voice Attendant: You shot the Yum Yum fish tank! You can't have weapons in here, you're banned for life!
Wiggum: I'm the law. You can't ban me. I can only ban myself! So… Chief Wiggum, you're banned!
Ralph: The water pandas taught me how to slide on my tummy. They're my Mommy and Daddy now!
Sarah Wiggum: There you two are!
Wiggum: I knew you'd recognize the sound of my gun.
Sarah Wiggum: Actually I followed the trail of dead fish to you.
Task: Make Sarah Wiggum Go Home in Shame
Time: 4h
Location: Wiggum House
Task: Make Wiggum Go Home With Pride
Time: 4h
Location: Wiggum House
Task: Make Ralph Go Home in Ignorance
Time: 4h
Location: Wiggum House
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
Atlantis
Auto starts
Milhouse: Look, Bart! It's Atlantis, the lost city!
Milhouse: I want to marry a mermaid. Let's go check it out!
Bart: You go ahead. I don't do fish or girls.
Milhouse: Fine, then you're not invited to our underwater wedding.
Task: Make Milhouse Fail to Find a Bride in Atlantis
Time: 4h
Location: Atlantis
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Spoon is Mightier Than the Sword Pt. 1
Knifey Spooney starts
Knifey Spooney: My first-time stateside. A lot smaller than I expected.
Knifey Spooney: I gotta find a good spot to grab a bevvie.
Task: Make Knifey Spooney Drink at Moe's
Time: 12h
Location: Moe's Tavern
Task: Reach Level 15 and Build Moe's Tavern
Knifey Spooney: This snake pit reminds me of my favorite bottle-o back home! America ain't so bad.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Spoon is Mightier Than the Sword Pt. 2
Knifey Spooney starts
Knifey Spooney: The perfect bottle-o of scum and villainy. But can't spend my whole trip drinkin'. Gotta see the sights.
Snake: Not so fast, crocodile skin. Fork over your money, or you'll be tasting my cold steel knife!
Knifey Spooney: You call that a knife?
Task: Make Snake Confront Knifey Spooney
Time: 4h
Location: Moe's Tavern
Task: Make Knifey Spooney Intimidate Snake With His Spoon
Time: 4h
Location: Moe's Tavern
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Spoon is Mightier Than the Sword Pt. 3
Snake starts
Snake: Dude, that's not fair! Where’d you get a spoon that big?
Knifey Spooney: It's not a spoon. Now this, this is a knife.
Knifey Spooney: Now I believe one of us was about to hand over all their money.
Snake: I think I hear my jail cell calling me. Bye!
Knifey Spooney: That bloke deserves a good bootin'. Good thing I don't leave home without mine.
Task: Make Knifey Spooney Patrol Springfield Wearing the Boot
Time: 4h
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Spoon is Mightier Than the Sword Pt. 4
Auto start
Bart: You're that weird guy we met in Australia. What are you doing here?
Knifey Spooney: Oh right, you're the kid that almost started a war.
Bart: Wars are easy. Homework is hard.
Knifey Spooney: If you say so, kid. Say, you up for a game of Knifey Spooney?
Bart: When am I not?
Task: Make Knifey Spooney Challenge Bart to a Game of Knifey Spooney
Time: 4h
Location: Brown House
Task: Make Bart Play a Game of Knifey Spooney
Time: 4h
Location: Brown House
Bart: C'mon, you gotta give me a chance to break even. Best out of 67!
Knifey Spooney: I think you've had enough.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Spoon is Mightier Than the Sword Pt. 5
Knifey Spooney starts
Knifey Spooney: No one in this town can challenge me at Knifey Spooney?!
Bart: I take offense to that.
Ned: I might be able to give you a fun-run for your money.
Knifey Spooney: This muzzy-lipped bloke is a joke, right?
Ned: You're sportin’ a cookie duster from down under yourself there, whisker mister!
Task: Make Knifey Spooney Challenge Springfielders to a Game of Knifey Spooney
Time: 4h
Location: Brown House
Task: Make Ned Dominate at a Game of Knifey Spooney
Time: 4h
Location: Flanders House
Knifey Spooney: This bloke's bottling his blood's worth! I'm bodgy compared to you. You have to teach me your ways.
Ned: I've got my first disciple! Follow me on the path to Ned-leousness knowledge.
Ned: First thing: recite the Lord's prayer backward while sortin’ knives and spoons in the silverware drawer.
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
Three-Eyed Whale
Auto starts
Smithers: Sir, is that whale another result of chemical spillage from the plant?
Mr. Burns: Nonsense, Smithers. I may drip but my plant nor I have any spillage issues.
If the user has Mr. Burns: Task: Make Burns Be in Denial of Three-Eyed Whale
Time: 4h
Location: Squidport Entrance or Control Building
Task: Tap Three-Eyed Whale
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
3:10 to Yo Yo Pt. 1
Yo Yo starts
Yo Yo: Can you believe it!? We are in the human world, the Toad Spirit must have teleported us here.
Lisa: Oh my gosh, Yo Yo! You're real!? And you speak English! Springfield English!
Yo Yo: Yes, we are very real but from another plane of existence. We have to catch the worm train back home.
Lisa: I don't know where worm trains come from, but good luck!
Task: Make Yo Yo Give Kangee a Snack
Time: 4h
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
3:10 to Yo Yo Pt. 2
Yo Yo starts
Yo Yo: Excuse me, strange being, have you seen a worm train?
Moe: Who youse calling strange? And leave my worms outta this!
Yo Yo: Uh-oh, Kangee, I think we upset it. We best be going.
Moe: And don't come back!
Moe: Unless it's family night at the bar, then bring your whole crew. It's a fun time for everyone.
Task: Make Yo Yo Bound Around to Find Worm Train
Time: 4h
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
3:10 to Yo Yo Pt. 3
Yo Yo starts
Yo Yo: Mister, have you seen the worm train?
Grampa: What the...? A flying Kangaroo! When I was in the war I flew a bunch of different animals... a jackrabbit...
Yo Yo: Oh, look at that, I actually think I see the worm train over there. Gotta go, bye!
Task: Make Yo Yo Avoid Grampa
Time: 4h
Location: Krusty Burger
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
3:10 to Yo Yo Pt. 4
Cletus starts
Cletus: Brandine, you see what I'm seeing?
Yo Yo: Kangee is pretty isn't she?
Cletus: Pretty tasty! We goin' eat good tonight.
Brandine: I'll fire up the stew pot!
Yo Yo: Hurry, Kangee, get us out of here!
Task: Make Yo Yo Escape Cletus
Time: 4h
Location: Brown House
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
3:10 to Yo Yo Pt. 5
Yo Yo starts
Yo Yo: Kangee, look! The worm train! We can finally go home!
Lisa: Yo Yo, wait! I've seen how the movie ends. You can't go back to your time. Besides, Springfield isn't so bad.
Yo Yo: Based on my experience, it's a pretty bad place. And I need to save Aunt Ginzee from the Toad Spirit.
Lisa: You never liked her anyway. Besides, what if she's happy with the Toad Spirit?
Yo Yo: She does make me brush my teeth before bed and got me socks for my birthday. You're right, she's the worst!
Lisa: Give Springfield another chance. We arrest people who give bad gifts!
Task: Make Yo Yo Give Springfield Another Chance
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Yo Yo: This might just be a good fit for us, Kangee. If we can avoid the people trying to kill and eat us.
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
Giant Lobster Scorpion
Auto starts
Willie: Look at the size of ya. You'd be a tasty treat on Willie’s dinner plate. That’s if Willie ate off dinner plates.
Squeaky Voice Attendant: Uh, Sir, you can't eat the Lobster Scorpion.
Willie: This crusty groundskeeper will eat any crustacean he wants. Now outta my way!
Task: Make Willie Try to Eat a Lobster Scorpion
Time: 4h
Location: Giant Lobster Scorpion
Task: Tap Giant Lobster Scorpion
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Tower of Babel
Auto starts
Ned: That, boys, is one of man's greatest mistakes. They tried to build a tower to heaven.
Rod: I want to go to heaven! Let's climb it!
Ned: No Rod, you diddly don't. The Lord dealt out a mighty powerful punishment on the people who built this tower.
Rod: Being punished is my favorite hobby!
Ned: Then your punishment is no punishment!
Task: Make Ned Be Condescending About Tower of Babel
Time: 4h
Location: Tower of Babel
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Rosh Hashanah Pt. 1
Rabbi Krustofsky starts
Rabbi Krustofsky: God, I was thinking, we never have guests over.
God: I wouldn't be able to walk around in my robe if we had guests, Krustofsky. You know I like my alone time.
Rabbi Krustofsky: How about just one guest? I would love to see my son.
God: Oh my Me. I can't say no to that face. Fine. But only for one day.
Task: Make Krusty Go to Jewish Heaven
Time: 4h
Location: Jewish Heaven
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Rosh Hashanah Pt. 2
Auto starts
Rabbi Krustofsky: It's good to see you again, son! I've missed you.
Krusty: Hi, Dad. Hey-Hey, God. What's the kid doing here?
Jesus Christ: S’up?
God: Trying to get him away from video games. Jesus, put the controller down!
Jesus Christ: Whatever.
Rabbi Krustofsky: Krusty, I'm glad you're spending New Year's Day with me. Did you bring my Shofar?
Krusty: It’s right in my big clown pocket!
Task: Make Krusty Blow His Shofar
Time: 4h
Location: Jewish Heaven
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Rosh Hashanah Pt. 3
Auto starts
God: It's time for you to go, Krusty.
Rabbi Krustofsky: I hate saying goodbye.
Krusty: Tell ya what, how about we eat some Krusty Burgers together before I go?
Rabbi Krustofsky: Guess I can't get any deader. Sure.
Task: Make Krusty Share a Last Meal
Time: 4h
Location: Jewish Heaven
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Rosh Hashanah Pt 4
Auto starts
Devil Flanders: Hottily-hoodily, underground neighborino! Welcome to H-e-double bent paper clips!
Krusty: What the-? How did I end up here? God said he was sending me home.
Devil Flanders: I'll bet he didn't specify which home. Pull up a pitchfork and get poking.
Krusty: I have to get out of here!
Task: Make Krusty Try to Escape Jewish Hell
Time: 4h
Location: Jewish Heaven
Krusty: This clown can't stay down. You gotta get me back up to Springfield.
Devil Flanders: What do I get by letting you go?
Krusty: I'll give you the souls of everyone who eats a Krusty Burger.
Devil Flanders: They have to eat AND digest it.
Krusty: Guh. That’s asking a lot.
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP
