Cutest Lil' Jazz Singer (3/12) Blog story discontinued

14 years ago

Blue Skies

Mama keeps dinner surprisingly simple this evening. I thought for sure since Howie brought a girl over she'd prepare something a little more special. I guess she was just tired. I'm glad she didn't ask me to do dinner. I'm a terrible cook. I guess she didn't want to ask Justice either since he was busy practicing.

I just love how my parents support the band. Oh yeah! They said I could sing with them as long as the gig wasn't on a school night! I'm both at once excited and scared outta my wits.

So, after dinner, Mama, Daddy, Howie and Marian all sit down to "have a chat". I'm sitting on the front porch, and I can hear them through the open kitchen window.

Marian fills in my parents on a recent art exhibition that featured a few of her pieces. I'm guessing Mama and Daddy are bored, because I sure am.

"But that's not why I brought her over tonight. I mean, yes, I wanted you to meet her." Howie says. "I wanted to let you know the news first. I've asked Marian to marry me, and she said yes."

WHAT?!?

The kitchen gets real quiet. REAL quiet.

I hear the smile in my father's voice, "Congratulations, son!"

Mama is real quiet.

"Welcome to the family, Marian." Dad says to her.

Mama finally speaks, "What did you say your last name was?"

"Gonzales." Marian answers. I don't know how Mama reacts because she's quiet again.

"We were hoping to have the ceremony here, if that's okay." Howie says.

"Where y'all planning to live?" Mama asks.

"Marian has a small apartment that will do... for now." I can hear the smile in Howie's voice as well.

"I see." Mama says.

Justice walks outside to sit down next to me. I stop paying attention to the kitchen. Darren on the phone in the living room talking to some girl kind of jumbles up what's going on inside.

"I take it you heard?" he asks.

"Yep." is all I answer.

"Whoever woulda guessed Howie would be the first?" he jokes.

"First to get married?"

"Yeah. I always thought it would be Marcus." he says.

"Marcus is too mean to keep a girl." I say and we both laugh.

"Maybe if he had a girl he wouldn't be so mean." Justice says with a smile.

I hear a chair scoot across the floor in the kitchen.

"Mama, you okay?" I hear Darren ask. "Hang on, Katy. Um, I'll call you back later."

"Mama!" Darren hollers.

I stand up and turn around to look in the window. Mama has passed out. Darren is next to her in seconds. Daddy jumps up from his chair and kneels down next to her as well.

As Daddy picks her up, Mama starts to complain, "I'm fine. I'm fine. Just a little tired still."

"Sasha, we need to go see the doctor." Daddy says.

"No, we don't need to go see the doctor. I tell you I'm fine." she sighs. "Why do you always haveta take me to the doctor? It's a waste of time. He'll just say I need to rest."

"You know perfectly well that he said if you have another spell like this to come and see him." Daddy softly scolds.

Justice and I insist upon going with them. Daddy relents and lets us. They get Mama in a room and she goes to sleep real quick.

They tell us the doctor should be in soon, but it feels like forever to me.

I hear the door open, and the doctor walks in.

He looks up and smiles a kind smile, and my knees feel like they've turned to jelly. Ever have a moment when it feels like time has slowed down to a much slower speed and you notice EVERYTHING around you?

Justice walks over and starts talking to him. I don't even hear what they're saying. That doctor's eyes strike away everything else around me to where they're all I notice.

I really hope I'm not being obvious. I just can't stop looking at him.

He's.... beautiful.

I feel my stomach twist in a knot. Fear? Excitement? I have no idea.

He looks over at me, and I feel like I want to faint.

Geez Louise! What is WRONG with me? Stop looking at him!

I try and fail.

He finishes talking to Justice, and Justice starts talking to Daddy. Then, the doctor walks... over.... to.... me! If I weren't literally backed into a corner I might've run away. I want to run away. I don't know why, but I can't seem to control the frantic pace my heart has taken up.

I put a hand to my forehead in an effort to mentally ward him off. I make an extreme effort to control my breathing.

Look at Mama, not me.

He speaks.

"Hi, I'm Doctor Marshall." He reaches to shake my hand and I mutely stare at it and don't move. He smiles and lowers his hand.

Rude, Gloria. Rude.

I force myself to stop looking at his eyes and look away.

"I'm Gloria, Sasha's daughter." I say, but I don't try to renew an effort to shake his hand.

"Are you alright?"

Do your doctoring on my Mama, doctor man. I can't take you near to me like this.

I take in a shaky breath, "Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little scared."

In more ways than one.

"Don't worry." the doctor says with a smile. "She's going to be okay. This is a nasty set-back, but we'll do what we can to make her well again."

"I don't understand." I say.

"We just don't understand why she's not getting better." he says.

I feel my face screw up in worry.

"But, she's going to be okay?" I ask.

"I'm pretty sure this is just a temporary set back. She just needs to rest some more."

Pretty sure? I need more than pretty sure, Mr. Cute Doctor-Man.

"But, how come you don't know why she isn't getting better as fast as you thought she was going to?" I ask.

I see a look of understanding in his beautiful eyes. "We don't know everything. There is still the occasional case that confuses us. But, I've seen things like this happen in the past and seen people get better."

And seen people NOT get better?

He walks over and checks Mama's vital signs, makes a note on a clipboard, and walks back over to me.

"My office is on the floor right below us if you feel like you need to talk to someone. You look like you're really worried. You don't need to worry. Your mother is going to be fine." he says to me with a smile and a kind voice.

I nod my head.

The doctor walks out into the hallway with my Daddy, and they talk. Daddy comes back in and the three of us sit there staring at each other. We don't sit there long, however. Daddy and Justice head to the cafeteria to find some coffee. I just wander the halls aimlessly. I don't want to be in the hospital room all by myself with Mama. It scares me.

I see an office door with "Dr. Marshall, M.D." on it. I knock on it. His voice says to come in.

"Gloria!" he looks up in surprise.

I don't know why he looks surprised. I don't know what expression is on my face. I kind of feel numb, but I know I'm definitely scared. I wonder if that's why I mindlessly found my way to his office.

"Are you okay?" he asks. "What am I saying? Of course you're not okay. You don't look okay. Have a seat."

I take the chair he indicated. "No, I don't think I'm okay."

His voice is gentle, "What can I do to help?"

"Would you stop beating around the bush and tell me just how sick my Mama is?" I finally get the courage to ask.

His eyes are sad. "Your Mama could get better..."

"Or she couldn't." I finish.

His eyes dart down to his desk, then look back up at me, "Yes. She could die. Your father... asked me not to tell you. I hope you don't tell him I told you anyway. I wasn't going to.... but when asked directly... I'm not going to lie."

I start breathing real fast. Mama could die. Mama could die. Mama could die.

"No. She's not gonna die! Not when we all need her." I stand up real fast and sway on the spot. That irritates me-the swaying. I can't make it stop.

The doctor hops up from his chair and walks around his desk. "You're right! She could just as easily get better! I'm in no way saying give up."

"But you said she could die!" I accuse.

"She could. She also could not. At least your father convinced her to come here so we could watch her and make sure she pulls through this spell."

"Explain what you mean by 'this spell'." I ask.

"We don't really understand what is happening with her. All we can tell is that it's probably a complication from when she had scarlet fever. Her body just can't seem to recover."

You're a doctor! You're supposed to know! What do you mean you don't understand!

That annoying swaying starts up again. Mr. Doctor-Man looks worriedly at me.

"Gloria? Perhaps you should sit down." he recommends.

"No. I wanna go find my Daddy and get him to tell me what you just told me. How can he say I don't need to know!" I say as the room tilts irritatingly.

Dr. Marshall reaches an arm out to catch me. "Gloria, you need to sit down for a few minutes first. You're hyperventilating."

Of course, I know he's right. "No, I'm not." I say stubbornly. "I wanna go find Daddy."

And you are WAY too close.

"Gloria...." I hear his voice from what sounds like underwater.

I fainted.

Dr. Marshall smiles slightly down at me, "Welcome back." He puts something back into his pocket.

"I fainted?" I groan. Oh that makes me so mad! Now he's going to think I'm some weak-kneed woman that swoons at the drop of a hat.

He laughs softly, "Don't be so hard on yourself. It happens."

"Not to me it doesn't!" I argue back.

I move to stand up, but he motions politely for me to stay seated. I mildly glare at him.

"I still need to go find my Daddy." I say stubbornly.

"I took the liberty of sending someone to find either your father or your brother." he says as the door opens.

Justice walks in. I continue my slight glare at the cute doctor.

Justice and Dr. Marshall go and talk quietly to one another. I don't WANT to listen to whatever it is they're saying. I just sit there in the comfy chair and stare at the city lights out the window.

Then we get up to leave. Dr. Marshall pats me on the back and tells me to take it easy. I say nothing to him. I do my best not to look at him. I don't want to see the beautiful eyes of the man that told me my Mama could die.

His eyes make me start thinking of that song "Blue Skies." Great. Now I have that song in my head.

He has beautiful blue sky eyes.

Humph. If he lets my Mama die I'll never forgive him.

------------------------------------------
Blue Skies by Irving Berlin. This link sung by Ella Fitzgerald.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nB-xqDZbEVQ

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