For proms: If you have the NRaas SP Careers module (not the NRaas Careers mod the SP Careers module) you might try:
City Hall or computer>NRaas>StoryProgression>General Options>Options: Situations>Options: Grads/Proms/Curfew>
Prom Chance Per Day>Default is 50%. Maybe change to 0. (This is the chance that the game will schedule a prom.)
Prom Cooldown>I think the default is 14 (in my game at university it's 33, but that might be because I'm playing on a longer lifespan). Maybe set this shorter.
When you are ready for a prom then go change the chance per day back to 50% or higher and shorten the cooldown.
If you want a sim to age up immediately click on the sim>NRaas>MasterController>Intermediate>Trigger Age Transition. I think that will work with inactives, but I don't think I've ever actually done so (I use that for actives all the time). I'd invite the inactive sim over to visit, then try that command (and exit without saving if anything goes wrong).
Sim>NRaas>Status>Personal should tell you a sim's age and days to transition.
edit: you can disallow teens from finding jobs with SP under the teenagers caste. I don't know if it's possible to delay them getting part time jobs though. Not sure how to slow down relationships forming other than slowing down SP's romance manager entirely. You're better off asking on the NRaas site.