The Mushroom Cloud Chronicles (Reboot)Chapter 3: The ReasoningCaptain Harmon Rabb, Jr,: The primary role of a drill instructor is to create chaos and stress - the reasoning behind that is the fact that soldiers and sailors will have to operate as a team under such stresses in combat. In the training scenario, a drill instructor uses intimidation and yelling to induce the stress response in the recruit so that he/she conforms to working as a team or cracks under pressure and quits. We are faced with a situation unlike any that we have faced before. Knowing that we are pawns under the nuclear umbrella and that we are less than one and a half minutes to midnight on the Doomsday Clock. Thus we are applying pressure to these recruits like they haven't seen before. It is absolutely necessary.
Now that I know what we are up against, I know exactly why we are so hard on these recruits. These are the people that we have to rely on with each other's lives. We have to know that we can depend on them in times of crisis. None of this application of stress is meaningless.
But it still doesn't stop me from cracking up when I see Animal give River McIrish a good once over when he is shocked to see the attire that she "formed up" in.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xqykNj1-kaU/WkfYypMAGMI/AAAAAAAAIa8/-sB6GHzScC0ZetGdPDIq8A-vMoeIlWKmQCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%252895%2529.jpg "Cadet McIrish, you look like you just had a morning romp in the hay; you look way too happy for 1200hrs. You look absolutely disheveled. Did you just crawl out from under the bed?"
"No, sir...no romp in the hay, sir... but I did crawl out of bed, sir. Was just playing the piano when you called us into formation, sir!"
"THAT WAS NOT WHAT I WAS ASKING, CADET MCIRISH! I ASKED IF YOU CRAWLED OUT FROM UNDER THE BED! Because that's what you look like!
"Sir, No SIR!"
River McIrish: I may be getting screamed at by him, but it certainly doesn't dampen my infatuation with him. OMG...close up out of the corner of my eye, I can see his ribbons on his chest and my god, does he ever have a lot of them...
https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ooH-k_2X0jo/WkfdtlIxEkI/AAAAAAAAIbI/tJ2u6Qt_HaIhMFGABtzS0jUxRfCzK0o_wCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%252896%2529.jpg Captain Harmon Rabb, Jr,: (coughs)Well, getting back on point...Animal proceeds to char Leighton Sekemoto even more. "You will have a high and tight by 0500 AM, Mr. Sekemoto so that you don't confuse the living plum out my drill instructors or you will be made to clean out the toilet with your head. Do I make myself clear?!" and Leighton yells out a petrified, "Sir, Yes, Sir!!!"
"You sound like an baby squirrel...grow a pair!!!"Animal's roar is painful even to my ears from across the bunker.
It's at this point that Meg gets up from the computer and flashes me an evil grin across the bunker. She and Animal are matched up way too well. They have an equally evil sense of humor as she proceeds to swap outfits from her red nightie to her Captain, JAGC, uniform...and marches forward to Madison Van Watson and hones in on her very apparent weakness. "Cadet Watson, you are on half rations and you'd better get your plum on that machine until you are at the proper weight for cadet training... THAT GOES FOR YOU TOO, Cadet Hatch!!!" It may have been cruel to single out Cadets Van Watson and Hatch for their extra weight, but cadets have to be at optimal weight for military training. They may have to carry a fellow soldier if they go down in battle or become incapitated in any way shape or form. The military is not politically correct, they cannot be. We don't have that luxury.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Zu8TPKDcV_A/WkfeAs9YqqI/AAAAAAAAIbQ/yyN7Gnfj6o8zRXMGckWpjJYXwCmgqyoKwCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%252897%2529.jpg I was handing out uniforms...to cadets and they were quickly dressing themselves and falling back in to line. Meanwhile Meg was shredding Madison Van Watson. "Maybe I should put you on quarter-ration. Looks like you need it!"
https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-XKto4fOcCyw/WkfecR96xAI/AAAAAAAAIbc/hALm9h6cMtY5D-cBwJ_X8PAkCXHOa2_sQCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%252899%2529.jpg The stress of seeing Meg at point-blank range, an intimidating scowl on her pretty face, caused Madison Van Watson to plum up big time.
"SIR, YES, SIR!!!"
I could see Meg's ire rise a few hundred degrees, her eyes narrowed and she roared: It's amazing the set of lungs on that gorgeous blonde Navy JAG Captain. Animal's a lucky man. "Cadet Van Watson: "DO YOU HAVE VISION PROBLEMS?!!! DO I LOOK LIKE A SIR TO YOU?!!! DO I HAVE A SET OF BALLS AND A WANG?!!! Last I checked I did not. WHAT IS MY GENDER!!!? CADET!!!!"
"MA'AM!!!"
"Good, at least you sounded off like
you have a pair!!!"
https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-cossHvqCdc4/WkfgKhZJ0VI/AAAAAAAAIbo/NZqg8nd9n8U-4DpU7FR7yBipsXx8VVLcACLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528100%2529.jpg "Are you eyeballin' me, Cadet Hart?!!! YOUR EYES BEST BE DRILLING IDENTICAL PARALLEL HOLES IN THE WALL... EYES FRONT!!!!"
https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-g4tUAn7ney0/Wkfgc8QXFsI/AAAAAAAAIbs/zsIiW2FKHmsIX1Uf7x3NZmK3FL6inUvRACLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528101%2529.jpg Cadet Bebe Hart:
OMG OMG OMG OMG...I'm so scared...https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-cqDJbitELS0/WkfgygUxOoI/AAAAAAAAIb4/A7wxGxGd5KI03chPkM0BMO_KGeuGVqdUQCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528103%2529.jpg At least Jared Frio got with the program and decided that he was about to obey any and all orders...before he got flayed by the vice-admiral. For once, Jared was smart.
https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-00W9YOZey7g/Wkfg-b0IXbI/AAAAAAAAIb8/wJ51fSveyzUP1FkaMM4unmwpt2j4h_sXwCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528104%2529.jpg Ah...and the light of my life. Colonel Sarah "Mac" Mackenzie, Marine Corps, decided to come out in Marine uniform. She decided to apply an extra bit of attention to Jared Frio. "Why, Jared, you look like you want my phone number..." she said with a hint of a saccharine touch. "Would you like that? Do you think I'm attractive?"
"Ma'am? Um...yes..." Jared asked questioningly, looking admiringly at her. That was a mistake
https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-dmuIpurAwoQ/WkfhvESCygI/AAAAAAAAIcI/aT3TDb_JMs01u4ZXPYJdYujj_3WZAyChgCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528106%2529.jpg "Well, Mr. Frio, you're not going to get my phone number...because Captain Rabb already has it. And you'd best get that greasy Elvis into a high n' tight...EH ESS EH PEE!!!! DO YOU READ ME?!!!"
"MA'AM YES MA'M!!!!"
https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xAzObnKO06Y/Wkfio5xcgbI/AAAAAAAAIcY/j0aPZkfM5XIG0QnSIPBrUyzB5ANfxk9yQCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528107%2529.jpg Mac turned her eyes towards Stiles McGraw who had been rotating his eyeballs in his skull looking Mac over...and bellowed. "Mr. McGraw, you'd best not be admiring my twin assets out the corner of your eye or I will run your plum around the flagpole until you dryheave your guts out!!!" Cadet McGraw's eyes clicked forward so fast I could hear them snap into place.
https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tya-B03iUJ4/WkfjG2WMn6I/AAAAAAAAIcg/v3ht55bZTfkxdi7iumPqzpxPgwGBMnB7ACLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528109%2529.jpg And Captain Liandra Gracen, JAGC, she was such a cute little redhead whose Irish temper belied her diminutive stature. She was a cute little pixie type, with gorgeous long flowing locks that she kept tied back in a regulation off the shoulder but not regulation messy bun. She decided to join in on the action, zeroing in on Cadet Blair Wainright who had just been issued a set of BDUs and a tee that she had changed into. "Why, you look nice..." she chirped.
https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-VwOP-ndang8/WkfkfWVTqbI/AAAAAAAAIcs/FvRGIEuip6ktInSnwxPMSTwKu8tinilwACLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528110%2529.jpg "I think you and I could be best friends...Wouldn't that be nice. Don't you? Would you and Cadet Kennedy like that?"
https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-RDtDAKWykMc/Wkfkff5fzLI/AAAAAAAAIcw/RPNIKLJR6ko5Q4krZiutIYkuWSew601XgCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528112%2529.jpg "Well...don't get used to the idea!!!" She snapped...turning off the friendly vibe and morphing into her JAGC Judicial, drill-sergeant mode. "You and I are on completely different wave-lengths. Until you become an officer, you are no where near my calibre. You'd best get squared away and understand that you are an enlisted in the Navy or Marines. And you'd best do that soon."
https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-qHmK1aE_KYY/WkfllGoxPkI/AAAAAAAAIc8/uHahm_2iKVQIQaYpCXYsfaKEn4eUKlJsgCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528114%2529.jpg "You went to the police academy, did you not? Cadet Wainright? There they instilled military discipline in you, did they not?"
"Ma'am Yes, Ma'am!!!"
"Well, this is the police academy on steroids, you'd best get your plum together and do it fast!!!"
https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-BGFVK2oWrAA/WkfmAT-opyI/AAAAAAAAIdA/WsOAm0f9AqQZvv4229KLhEivwmY6tOVUgCLcBGAs/s1600/Screenshot%2B%2528115%2529.jpg We didn't have time for niceties. With the world going to heck in a hand-basket, we didn't have that kind of luxury. We needed people we could rely on and if we had to break a few eggs, we were going to meld these people into the type of people that we could really rely upon...in times of crisis. Because the world was going to get a lot harsher if the politicians and higher-ups couldn't get their act together in time before the missiles got launched.