Yeah, the dots are part of the run-on sentences :-) The other part is the comma splices- where a comma is where a full stop/period should be. So for example, we'll take a paragraph from what you've just posted:
The original:
"If she's walking around half naked for his benefit, if she's trying to get some attention from him it's definitely not working, he doesn't bat an eyelid, while me, I would so have taken advantage of the situation by now, not sat there reading the newspaper!!"
Without the splices:
"If she's walking around half naked for his benefit, if she's trying to get some attention from him, it's definitely not working. He doesn't bat an eyelid! While me, I would so have taken advantage of the situation by now- not sit there reading the newspaper!"
So stuff like that. Forgive me for going into examples and all that. I was an editor on my school's newspaper for a long time, and all my friends have me correct their papers and essays so I can't help myself from going into detail :lol:
I see. I have been checking the blog constantly over the weekend waiting for an update (I had nothing to do as my car broke and I couldn't go home as I had planned), but it makes sense that you would have to do that. I know Story Progression causes my saves to lag so awfully after a generation or so. I usually end up just turning it off.
This first part of the side story is already keeping me entertained. I was a bit anxious of Gravel's and Coral's attraction and how it might hurt Slate, but now that I can see that he doesn't really care about Coral I'm rooting for her ending up with Gravel :mrgreen:
