Between2Worlds [Story] 06/04
https://i.ibb.co/xYcr7Zv/B2-WPart2-Banner.jpg Prologue here. Prologue here.
Forum Discussion
Part 3!
Writing
Writing
Spoiler
- Were there any themes that stood out for you in this story? How do you think I handled them?
this story had quite a few themes. coming of age, finding yourself, but also serious themes like crime, manipulation and trauma. I think they were all handled appropriately.
- What do you think of my balancing action/non-action scenes, thrill/non-thrill? Were you able to wind down before the next one, or is the story's arrangement fine with you? Some have told me they needed to take a break from the story because it was so uh full on(?). How was it for you?
I think it was fine. I didn't read it in one go (didn't had the time), but I like it when a story is dense and has multiple layers and lots of actions.
- There’s a shift in my writing style/length between chapter 1-5 and the rest of the story. I also experimented with different mediums. What do you think of:
The comic strip? Was its organisation easy to follow? Were the Speech bubbles clear who’s talking and who’s next?
I think I have commented that I think the comic is very well done.
Picture Sequences: Did you prefer the speech text organised around the subject in the picture? Or placed at the bottom and color coded?
I am not sure. Aesthetically it's prettier to have the text at the bottom. But I usually struggle a little to connect text and speaker, so a (Name):(text) would be helpful for me when the text is at the bottom, but that also interrupts the reading flow, so I guess everything would be semi-optimal xD still I like this style of storytelling a lot, I guess tumblr got me used to it xD
Do you like this randomness of switching mediums? :lol:
I always love your pictures and the details you put in them, so every time I see a comic or pic+text story, I am happy to get extra candy :grin: I don't really care what medium you use, they're all well executed though.
At some point I tried to add more descriptions/elaboration of the setting and ambience than moving the story along. (Chapter 14.2 and 14.21) What do you think of the writing in these chapters compared to the rest of my writing? Do you have a preference? (If there’s no difference you can say that too. :lol: )
Lol. I didn't notice if the writing is different :joy: But I really liked the intensity of those chapters.
- I overly rely on pictures to describe the setting than write it out. Does this style work for you?
Yes, since you add the pictures, the obvious description is not needed.
- Romance is hard to write and personal. There are some scenes and pictures that were too much for me in the story, but I’m a conservative person. How were they for you? Were any of them cringey? If yes, which one? so I can work on those. And do you have suggestions?
Nope, not cringey. I cringe at overly detailed or sterile descriptions of sexual acts (me, personally), but you relied mostly on pictures which I am perfectly fine with (even if they would be very explicit). However, I giggled when Athena suddenly had an undershirt that would be visible with the dress she wore before. I thought it was cute xD
One advice, if those scenes make you too uncomfortable but you insist they are important for your story development, you can show that they happened in one or two screenshots (censored by the right angle/cut etc.) without showing what explicitly happened. A story doesn't need pictured intimacy to be good :)
- Were there any themes that stood out for you in this story? How do you think I handled them?
this story had quite a few themes. coming of age, finding yourself, but also serious themes like crime, manipulation and trauma. I think they were all handled appropriately.
- What do you think of my balancing action/non-action scenes, thrill/non-thrill? Were you able to wind down before the next one, or is the story's arrangement fine with you? Some have told me they needed to take a break from the story because it was so uh full on(?). How was it for you?
I think it was fine. I didn't read it in one go (didn't had the time), but I like it when a story is dense and has multiple layers and lots of actions.
- There’s a shift in my writing style/length between chapter 1-5 and the rest of the story. I also experimented with different mediums. What do you think of:
The comic strip? Was its organisation easy to follow? Were the Speech bubbles clear who’s talking and who’s next?
I think I have commented that I think the comic is very well done.
Picture Sequences: Did you prefer the speech text organised around the subject in the picture? Or placed at the bottom and color coded?
I am not sure. Aesthetically it's prettier to have the text at the bottom. But I usually struggle a little to connect text and speaker, so a (Name):(text) would be helpful for me when the text is at the bottom, but that also interrupts the reading flow, so I guess everything would be semi-optimal xD still I like this style of storytelling a lot, I guess tumblr got me used to it xD
Do you like this randomness of switching mediums? :lol:
I always love your pictures and the details you put in them, so every time I see a comic or pic+text story, I am happy to get extra candy :grin: I don't really care what medium you use, they're all well executed though.
At some point I tried to add more descriptions/elaboration of the setting and ambience than moving the story along. (Chapter 14.2 and 14.21) What do you think of the writing in these chapters compared to the rest of my writing? Do you have a preference? (If there’s no difference you can say that too. :lol: )
Lol. I didn't notice if the writing is different :joy: But I really liked the intensity of those chapters.
- I overly rely on pictures to describe the setting than write it out. Does this style work for you?
Yes, since you add the pictures, the obvious description is not needed.
- Romance is hard to write and personal. There are some scenes and pictures that were too much for me in the story, but I’m a conservative person. How were they for you? Were any of them cringey? If yes, which one? so I can work on those. And do you have suggestions?
Nope, not cringey. I cringe at overly detailed or sterile descriptions of sexual acts (me, personally), but you relied mostly on pictures which I am perfectly fine with (even if they would be very explicit). However, I giggled when Athena suddenly had an undershirt that would be visible with the dress she wore before. I thought it was cute xD
One advice, if those scenes make you too uncomfortable but you insist they are important for your story development, you can show that they happened in one or two screenshots (censored by the right angle/cut etc.) without showing what explicitly happened. A story doesn't need pictured intimacy to be good :)
