**BIG hugs, BabyDollAnne**
You have lots more people who care about you. I care about you! I'm across an ocean and a continent, so I can't pop over to meet you at the cafe for tea and cookies... except for virtually!
Here's tea! Here's cookies! :)
I wonder if you feel up to getting out a little bit each day and going someplace where you can see a smile and share a friendly word with someone...
You know, when you think of what you're feeling, a lot of it is how we're wired: we are wired to interact with people, to feel that we belong in a tribe or in a village, because when our species evolved, it was necessary that we belonged. If we didn't belong, we and our offspring might not survive! So through the evolution of people, it became hard-wired into us that we maintain feelings of connection.
When you look at the society and worlds that most of us live in now, belonging to a clan, tribe, or village isn't necessary for our survival: in the current Western culture and world, we can survive as loners. Yet, at the same time, our brains still have all the wiring from when we needed to belong to others. That's why, when our boyfriends leave for a few weeks and our best friends aren't available, we can feel miserable: it's just our coding acting up, screaming to us that we need these others to survive. I felt this way on vacation last week because I didn't see a lot of people each day!
So, what do we do? Sometimes, it helps to remind ourselves that what we feel is the response of our evolutionary coding to the current situation. Then, we can reassure ourselves that we'll be just fine, we'll survive, and we can watch with curiosity how we feel when our evolutionary coding gets triggered...
Then, we can take small baby steps of action... This is where going out can help. I have noticed that some of my social needs to connect can be fulfilled even by a friendly smile from a stranger! When I walk past people, and I smile to them, and they smile back, I notice shifts in my brain chemistry, and I start to feel happier, feel like I belong, and my social needs begin to be filled! The same when I share friendly words with the person behind the counter at Starbucks or the store. So... a lot of your social needs and feelings of loneliness can be met even with small, quick exchanges with strangers, little "hi's" and smiles and "how are yous?"
You know that your boyfriend and best friend will be back soon, so once they do, they'll be available to help meet those needs for deep connections that sensitive souls like you (and I) have... And in the meantime, little interactions might help the days feel less lonely while you wait for their return.
You might think of yourself as a Sim... If you were a Sim, and your Social bar were deep in the red, what would you do for yourself before the Social Bunny arrived?
And big hugs, and lots of tea, and let's have another cookie! <3
(And remember: there are so many, many people who care deeply about you!)
