@RipuAncestor So happy you said something! I really love your insights and observations, and they help me process and understand my own experience better!
That's what I love about hearing other people's stories and experiences: they really help me to learn, understand, and put together pieces.
This whole conversation is making me happy and warm-feeling--thank you!
@rednenemon I'm sorry that you've had unhappy experiences with people face-to-face. Most of my f2f interactions are neutral to positive, with unpleasant ones being the extreme exception. I've had more unpleasant experiences online than f2f, but fortunately, even those have been rare.
It also seems, red, that you've got a really great understanding of online relationships! (Of course, I was thinking of you and Trip when I mentioned that some people form great online relationships and can really make them work for them.) It's great to know that in general online relationships work for you! I also like the way that you seem to have expectations that fit the nature of online relationships and bring out the best of them--I can use you as a role model! :)
@Twiggy Your kind words really make me happy!
@lisabee2 It feels good to know we're not alone, doesn't it? And I also like the way we're exploring this to gain understanding.
@Twiggy and @RipuAncestor I really like both of your observations about rooms and seeing forum threads as rooms. I'm the same with crowded rooms: If I even go in them (and if given a choice, I'll usually just head outside under the clouds), then I'll stand along the wall or in the corner, preferably with a clear path to the door, and watch, too.
Thinking about this made me consider how I view the threads here as rooms:
I really see the Kindness Bench as a bench in a nice secluded part of a public park, with lots of gardens and flower borders around it and big shade trees-maples! :) And I always keep an eye in this corner so that whenever anyone pops over, I can stop by with a smile, just to let the person know they're not around. I may not have the right words to help, but I can stop by and smile. And sometimes, just knowing you're not alone is enough.
I see the Book Club as a big round room in a library! Since I organize it, I always put on my work apron with lots of pockets and show up to contribute and get work done! I like it.
I see the reading circles I belong to as spots in a big communal home. Puffclaws feels to me like a garden with a lots of garden rooms where we can sit in twos and threes and chat. Art Commune feels like a big country kitchen, and I always feel welcome there. If I'm the only one there, I feel like I can pour a cup of tea, pull out my journal, and express myself, looking out the window at the butterflies over the garden. When others are there, I feel like I can join them at the round table, talking, sharing, and just listening. I always feel like I belong in the reading circles--and, in fact, that's what reading circles were created for! To give writers a spot where they could feel at home with friends!
I see the Writers' Lounge as a corner cafe. Often, I'll just walk by and look through the window. If it's too crowded, I tend to stay outside. If I see a little cluster of friends chatting, I'll pop in. If I see someone new, I'll stop by to welcome them. If no one or just a few people are there, I might pop in and chat!
I tend to see other people's threads as their homes, and if I'm friendly with them or invited (through tagging), I might come to visit!
This helps, for me, to view these online places as physical spaces. I think that gives me a better understanding of my own feelings and responses towards my communication and interaction styles there.
How about you? How do you view the different spaces in here?
