Sexy Pirate ... What is he saying?

I clearly must have a hearing problem ... but for the life of me no matter how much I try to isolate the Sexy Pirate, I cannot understand half of what he says. I get the first two or three words of each line he speaks, but the remainder fades away into unintelligibility.

I've already googled 'tsto sexy pirate lines' and find absolutely nothing out in the wild (tsto addicts and tstopix come up nada), so I'm hoping somebody among this crowd has deciphered his argot and is willing to share.

Please and thank you!