Dorian - Magister's birthright will not trigger

I am having the exact same problem. I speak with Dorian, tell him I want us to get to know each other better, which supposedly begins a romance with him. He warns that people will talk, I say "Let them" and he says something like "We'll see how this goes." I can talk to Dorian again and the exact same options are there to begin the romance as if I had not just had this conversation with him. I go downstairs to Solas' room and wait...nothing. I did a few side quests and returned to Solas's room...nothing. I went back up to Dorian but the only conversation option available is the same one I had already done repeatedly that supposedly begins the relationship with him. I went back to Solas' room. Nothing. I went to Val Royeaux to see if Ponchard was in the Vestibule. Nope. He's nowhere to be found. I double checked to be sure that Dorian's other two quests are complete, and they are. I have chosen every romance option in the past and never told him I wanted to keep it platonic or anything like that. I am 43 hours into the game and was considering starting over but then found out I can't restart with the inquisitor I have already built. I am so frustrated now that I don't even want to play this game anymore after waiting all this time for all the bugs to be worked out for the Game of the Year edition.

Oh, and I advanced the main story by completing the Wicked Eyes, Wicked Hearts quest and took Dorian along but he doesn't act like we are involved at all...shouldn't we have had the option to dance since we are supposedly in a relationship? Upon returning to Skyhold I went to talk to him again. He talked about the ball and said he hoped I tried the ham. After that the only conversation option is the same one that supposedly starts the relationship. I went back through all of the before mentioned steps (waiting in Solas's room, doing side quests, going to Val Royeax) and nothing happens. I have saved, reloaded, restarted my PS4, and I still can't get the messenger to show up in Solas' room.

I have already completed the quest where Mother Giselle tells you that Dorian's father wants to meet him at the tavern in Redcliffe. After that quest I talked to Dorian about what happened at the tavern. He told me his story, I romanced him, maxed out the conversation to the point I mentioned earlier. His final quest should trigger after that. From what I have read, a messenger from Leiliana brings you a letter when you enter Solas's room telling you to meet Ponchard at Val Royeaux to get Dorian's amulet back. I have already completed Dorian's One Less Tiventer quest as well as the one given to you by Mother Giselle.