Disappearing Sim Workaround
I know EA said this was patched out, but it just happened to me today for the first time, assuming this is what was actually happening to other people and not a new thing.
I played for awhile and everything was fine, came back to my game later and the adult female from my household was missing. She was in the thumbnails only. I went into SimPe to check things out and she was not listed. Additionally, there was some random male Sim listed as being in their household, even though he wasn't actually there either.
Back in my game, I used testing cheats to spawn the tombstone of life and death, chose add neighbor to family, and scrolled through all of the names until I found her. She was added back to the family and was still there after three times saving and quitting. I do not know if she could potentially disappear again or if there will be any further issues if you leave it here. In game, everything looked fine.
In SimPe, she was still not listed and the other Sims memories were of the random male Sim instead of her. I found that name in the Sim Descriptions and it was her. For some reason, even though her name appeared correctly in game, it had been changed in the character information listed for her. I fixed her name and now everything displays as it should. Two more short play throughs, saves, and quits and she is still there.
Edit: Despite me having previously installed both patches, my game popped up today saying it needed updated again. So it's possible it got interrupted and didn't actually finish before. But, I know Sims occasionally disappeared before Legacy, so this may be helpful to someone anyway.