The Freezer Bunny Club - A Reading Circle

Hmm, maybe I should add a third option of "neither" to the cats or dogs question, then :D

Your chapters feel like they're the right length. This last one was longer than usual and I did notice that a bit, but I do enjoy your story so much I didn't particularly mind. 3.000 words overall seems like a good length. As long as there's some Arthur in it ( :D ).

Thank you for the feedback! I'll try to keep an eye on not letting the chapters go on for too long. :blush: Looking forward to the rest of your feedback!

Definitely dogs. #TeamNinja

Dangit! I should have known Ninja is too strong a foe to defeat :D

Ehhhhhm, who's Richard again???? :D Is he that little black-haired boy? I even remember Agravaine more than Richard HAHAHAHAH oops.

Woops, maybe I should have put Agravaine on the banner instead of Richard, then :D Thank you for the feedback. He's a big driving force behind Morgana's behaviour in my mind, but in the story he's only appeared one time, so it's good to get a reader's perspective on this. Noted for the future!

Merlin is going to come back at a very delicate time. WATCH MY WORDS.

Are you a mind reader, too? :o

Have you tried hitting the shift-button? :') Idk that's how I always take my pictures. Hit shift-button, 'walk' around with WASD, changing angles with my mouse (I always have my computer mouse in the screen so I need to click until it's away and then I can move around as much as I want) and when I take a picture, I hit C.

Wait, shift is still a thing? I'm going to try that when I'm done with work today. Thanks for the tip!

Now I'm wondering... How on earth did you do Morgana's magic?

Adobe fireworks, random sparkly effects from the internets and a lot of frustration :lol: It was the game version of a person on set being told to put out their arm with the special effects guy going "It'll look awesome later! I promise!"

I'm with you! That white pose statue likes to irritate me when I use it. It NEVER stands on the place where I want it.

Yes! First ally obtained!

Oof, I need to think about that but I'll give every character something soon! (I'm too lazy to think about it now and I still have a whole week hehe)

Okay! I look forward to it o:)

Shifting perspectives is an important writing technique to build a relationship between the character and reader. As long as it is structured clearly within the chapter you can peek into several perspectives and readers will go along with it. IMO there is a time when it will be too much. When ‘head-hopping’, it is usually done with a purpose I.e. you want to show their backstory, inner thoughts/dilemma which is so so important for reader/character intimacy. If shown too many without connection to one another, it may come across as rushed, but if they both are dwelling on the same issue, or one causes the effect of the other, the story will flow seamlessly between the perspectives.

Thank you for your perspective! I've seen people divide chapters into two parts before - one from the perspective of A, and one from B, while they go through the same event. That's an interesting way of doing it too, but I always end up skipping through parts of B because we already know what happened from the last chapter.

In one of my comments, I asked about Morgana because while she is the main character. I find her so endearing and lovely that I have not yet found a weakness in her. She is a perfect all-round character who isn’t too arrogant and isn’t too pure, considerate of others and a healthy trust/mistrust. A very good balance. There are no problems with characters like this, (There are so many like this too actually) but it does put Morgana at a disadvantage compared to Arthur and Gawain. To err is human and at this point, Morgana’s lack of weakness makes me unable to relate to her.

I can relate to wanting to be like her and I do like her, but I feel so much closer to Arthur and Gawain because I can imagine a time when I was just as arrogant, or just as pure at some point in my life, but not so much to being perfect. Especially when Morgana is a budding spellcaster, she is going to become quite an unstoppable force in the future. So to enrich her character, it’ll be good to portray her not in her best moments. It’ll be good for us too! Because once we know what is her kryptonite, readers will be actively looking out for it because we’re invested in her wellbeing and we don’t want her to get hurt like that again!

Thank you for bringing up Morgana. Her flaws are very clear in my head, but you're right that they haven't really shown themselves in the story yet. I'll keep that in mind, and try to show them a little clearer in future chapters.

It goes into their teens and Richard looks like a promising young chap so. Arthur and Gawain are showing signs of brotherhood/good relations. Merlin is safe from harm so… Hi Romance! You can start budding now. Btw I have no idea about the orignal Camelot so I’m purely saying this of my own imagination.

Haha, I see that most of the future ships will probably be coming from you o:) There's definitely potential for it though, yeah! That reminds me, I have no idea how medieval courtship works. Better read up on that before they turn into teenagers.

I think you're worrying about obscure details again. :smile:

I know :sweat_smile: figured it couldn't hurt to ask, hehe.

Hmm.. I’m using a camera mod for my pictures. I don’t know if you find my photos ‘dynamic’ but you could try the mod. I can’t give you a good overview on this because I had this installed since forever so I’m not sure if there’s any difference between ingame default picture taking or this xD

Oooh, there's a whole mod for that? I'm going to try Skeilah's suggestion first tonight, but if that doesn't work, I'll definitely check it out!

LOL. I have no words. But of course I’m with you! Let’s take em down!

Hahaa, two allies! Statue won't know what hit it.