The Parker Saga

Chapter Four A: Where It All Began

Windenburg was a quaint little town not far from Henford-on-Bagley. The little timber-framed bungalow in the Windslar neighbourhood looked cosy, which Joshua found reassuring.
In answer to his knock, a woman with dark brown curly hair came to the door.
"Hi, I'm Ayesha," she said. "You must be... Joshua Parker, is that right?"
"Yeah, that's me."
"Come on in."

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Although Joshua had never been to counselling before, he guessed that the room was decorated pretty typically. Blue was the predominant colour, no doubt chosen for its calming nature. There was even a little box of tissues on the coffee table. Joshua didn't know if he'd need them or not.
"So... you've come from Henford-on-Bagley, yes?" Ayesha asked.
"I have. But I grew up in Del Sol Valley."
"Ok," Ayesha said, scribbling in her notebook. "This is just a question for diversity monitoring purposes, but can I ask if you're an occult?"
"Yes," Joshua replied. "I'm a Spellcaster. But I wasn't born one, I underwent the Rite of Ascension as a teenager."
"Right," Ayesha nodded. "Are you married?"
"Yes," Joshua said, and Ayesha noticed the smile creeping onto his face. "We've got four daughters, two sets of twins. The oldest set just became teenagers."
"Do you have a job?"
"Yes, I'm a mechanical engineer."

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"So, what brings you here today?"
"Umm..." Joshua replied. It was such an obvious and simple question, yet he suddenly felt tongue-tied. There wasn't a simple answer.
"Don't worry," Ayesha smiled. "It's surprisingly common for people to go silent when they hear that question."
"Well..." Joshua said, "I didn't... I didn't have a great childhood."
But I kind of did, he thought. It wasn't like I grew up poor, I had everything I wanted... in a material sense.

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"Were you an only child?"
"Yes," Joshua said. "Mum wanted a girl... I don't know why she didn't try for another child. Unless she did and just didn't ever conceive..."
"Your mother wanted a girl? But only had you?"
"Yeah..." Joshua sighed. "She told me as much, once. So that was disheartening."
"I can imagine," Ayesha sympathised.
"I'd just told her I wanted to do mechanical engineering at university... so it all came out," Joshua sighed. "She wasn't doing as well in her career as she wanted... I'd never wanted to do acting, I preferred the idea of Scouts..."
He lapsed into silence, and Ayesha waited patiently.

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"That's tough," Ayesha said.
"Yeah. I guess I just wasn't ever good enough for her."
"Wow, as bad as that?" Ayesha asked, and Joshua nodded. "Is your mother still alive?"
"No. She died a while ago now. My dad died more recently."

They spoke a little more about what Joshua could expect from the sessions, then the time was up.
"Thank you for today," Ayesha said in the hallway. "I'm just going to give you a little homework. Would you mind filling in this form, just about your feelings, and I can determine if you're suffering from a specific mental illness or not."
"Is it a problem if not?"
"No. You may have a number of symptoms of, say, anxiety or depression without meeting the official diagnostic criteria, but you can still benefit from therapy. You sound like you have some unresolved issues relating to your childhood and adolescence, and hopefully I can help you achieve some sense of closure."
"Right. Thank you very much, Ayesha. Is it OK to use your first name?"
"Of course. Whatever you feel comfortable with."

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