FlamingoKicker What you are seeing with getting all those phone calls is neighborhood stories at work. Once they start, you will see a few almost every day depending on how you've set it in each Manage Household tab. The sims that die from those calls generally don't show up in your rel panel as you have never actually met them despite the wording of the wall posts you are getting. Any of them you have actually met while still alive, should be in your rel panel for around 90 days after they die unless they had already dropped out of the panel due to relationship culling.
Hope this helps.
