How do I locate a dead sim's tombstone or urn?

I know of one way, but it requires the MCCC mod.

@FlamingoKicker1, my understanding is it should be there. Maybe in the ghost's inventory or in the household inventory for the house where the deceased lived if other living folks still live there?

Used to be that only active sims or those who died on the active lot generated tombstones, but I guess that was changed in a patch a year or so ago. I did a google search on this just a few days ago myself. One thing I can tell you is that the google search revealed a lot of people have problems finding urns/tombstones in circumstances where a ghost dies off-lot.

Summoning the ghost to your lot, bring them back from the dead, and then re-killing them with MCCC seems to be a popular solution. The mod to show sim info is a good tool to use to find where the ghost is, if you are willing to use mods. You could install the mod, find the ghost, and then uninstall the mod even, if you aren't down with using mods.

There was a thread about this topic recently, and for the life of me, I can't find it. >.<

Anyways, I had a similar experience where I really wanted to keep a Sim's urn, but it was nowhere to be found. Sims would go to mourn in front of the bed, as far as I could tell. This was my method to get the ghost and the urn, if you really, really don't want to use mods...

Unfortunately, there's no easy way to summon a ghost if a writer didn't make a book about them before they died. I usually just move everyone out of the ghost's lot except a vampire, because they can hibernate in a coffin indefinitely. Let time speed up and if it slows down suddenly for reasons other than a phone call, odds are the ghost is in the house somewhere. If you have City Living, the ghost might also invite you to a festival. However, you cannot invite them into the household during a social event. In this case, save when you arrive at the festival, then cancel the social event and quickly ask the ghost to hang out. (They tend to vanish right when the social event ends, so the save lets you try again.)

You need to have the friendship bar nearly completely full for the "Invite to Household" option to come up. When the ghost is in your household, the urn cannot be destroyed. So you can demolish the lot the urn is on and it will automatically go to the household inventory. I don't know if there's other ways of making the urn incapable of being destroyed, but if there are, it would be useful to know.

Thanks. These are good advice. The sim was an Elder so even if I rejuvenated her she would probably die again anyway just from being old so no big loss. I was just curious what happened to her. More likely her urn is in her son's inventory (or more accurately the household inventory). I will check there next time I play that household.

Look through their relationship panel at all the sims they know. In Sims 4 when a sim dies, their picture is still there, but their photo will look grey.

Also, they don't even have to be friends with the sim that died, just witnessed the death of any sim will result in a sad moodlet as well.

I got several insightful replies in this thread:

is-there-a-smart-way-to-locate-a-sims-gravestone