"EmmaVane;c-18055447" wrote:
"PenguinFoop;c-18054928" wrote:
If the person that I married decided he/she wanted another spouse as well. I would wish them the best and leave the relationship so they could fulfill that desire.
The difference between this and consensual polygamy (even consensual polyamory) is that in the example above you entered an agreement with one person, who then tried to change that agreement without consulting you. This is like a breach of contract in law terms.
If a person takes a (or several) consenting partner(s)/spouse(s), then takes (an) additional partner(s)/spouse(s) with knowledge by, but without the consent of existing one(s), this is a breach of contract with the existing partner(s)/spouse(s).
If a person takes on an additional partner/spouse without knowledge (and by default, also consent) by the existing partner(s)/spouse(s), this is again a breach of contract with the existing partner(s)/spouse(s).
However...
If a couple find themselves interested in a third party, discuss it together, then discuss with the third party and that third party joins in the relationship, then that is a mutually beneficial agreement between 3 consenting adults.
If 3 single people meet, hook up casually and then decide to stay as a throuple, this is a mutually beneficial agreement between 3 consenting adults.
If a person is involved with 2 others, who know of each other but only have a platonic relationship between them and the two partners don't mind (or actively enjoy) sharing the same partner, then that is a mutually beneficial agreement between 3 consenting adults.
Now on to how to do this in game and make everyone happy:
We would need two separate toggles (checkboxes, not radio buttons) to allow polyamory:
- Consensual polyamory (allow multiple partners with consent from existng partner(s)).
- Non-consensual polyamory (allow multiple partners without consent, cheating) - Note: Player initiated always allowed.
And a third toggle to allow or disallow poly marriage.
With these options you could:
- Disallow consensual poly relationships. Disallow cheating from non-consensual poly relationships.
- Allow consensual poly relationships and allow them to marry. Disallow cheating/bigamy from non-consensual poly relationships.
- Allow consensual poly relationships but not allow them to marry. Disallow cheating from non-consensual poly relationships.
- Allow consensual poly relationships and allow them to marry. Allow cheating/bigamy from non-consensual poly relationships.
- Allow consensual poly relationships but not allow them to marry. Allow cheating from non-consensual poly relationships.
- Allow consensual poly relationships and allow them to marry. Disallow cheating/bigamy from non-consensual poly relationships.
- Allow consensual poly relationships but not allow them to marry. Allow cheating from non-consensual poly relationships.
This way everyone is covered, and it also resolves the accidental cheating when Flirty and in group chats.
I understand and agree with what you're saying. Marriage has always been a contract between individuals (some being forced into said contract). Again, it's up to the individuals in the relationship. I personally wouldn't do it. And my original concerns have still gone unanswered.
You explain quite well how adding another member to the relationship works. The problem is that people are as much, if not more governed by emotion more than logic. So what I'm talking about is the emotional side of it.
What happens if three people get into a consensual relationship and one of them gets jealous that the other two are spending more time together than with that one? Or if there turns out to be a personality clash between two? One person will have to make a choice. This happens in monogamous relationships often enough. Add more people and you substantially create the potential scenario.
This is why
I personally would not be involved in that situation. People are too incapable to deal logically with emotional situations. I am not saying that people should not be allowed to do it. I'm just saying that if you do, you are more than likely setting yourself up for mental and emotional damage. So since this happens so often in monogamous relationships, why add more chances for it to happen? I mean, if it's about feelings and not physical desire, then become bff's with one or the other. You don't have to share a bed for that. If it's about physical desire, then doesn't that mean that at least one person in the relationship isn't physically attractive enough for one of the others? That's got to have a nagging subconscious affect.
As for in the game, it is only a game but a game about simulating life. This means that if you were to add a feature, you have to add the goods and bads of that feature to show at least some hint realism with it. Add a washing machine, then that washing machine has to be capable of breaking. Add weather and there must be storms. Any aspect of any scenario has to have good and bad in order for the human mind to accept it. This is why utopia is such a grand aspiration but is realistically unattainable.
Anyway, this discussion is turning, at least in my mind, too much about changing society than changing a game. So I'll just say that with that in mind, if we can't even keep the conversation game-based in here, how can it remain game based in the game?
