I have avoided the butler in TS4. The butler in TS3 drove me crazy and I decided I just can't have anyone in my household that I don't have direct control over. In TS3, my butler was an over-achiever and took over the family. I couldn't develop a relationship with my babies or toddlers because the butler was always there first when they had a need. Every time I threw a party the butler cleaned up all the food before the guests could eat. And even though I built a beautifully appointed butler's suite with it's own kitchen and living area (and assigned her bed ownership), she never went in that area. She slept in the family beds. When she crawled in bed with my Sim's husband I had to let her go.