The Sims News: The Future Is Plumbob Green!

>The year is 2036
>The Sims 4 has announced its 86th Expansion Pack, Get Rhinoplasty
>Bug fixes have a staggered release date: you must buy the latest DLC to get them right away, or must wait three months for the public release
>The 82nd EP, Get to Jury Duty, But it's a Rabbit Hole, has broken the game so bad that it won't even turn on anymore
>But the pack is a fan-favorite because it has a whopping 3 lots across 2 neighborhoods, and they're all enormous, at 20x15. 
>The new limited-time event, True Fans' Celebration, gives you new items (all reskins of DLC items) for every piece of DLC you buy within the allotted time frame 
>Game Packs and Stuff Packs have gone extinct
>Kits are now just reskins of basegame items
>Kits are released 20 times a quarter and make up 99% of all content updates
>A new pack type is introduced: Grab Packs. Basically mini refreshes sold as different packs
>Get to Witches' Wands is the new Grab Pack: Get 6 new wands (all reskins of RoM wands) and a limited set of magic spells. 
>The spells are accessible for witches if you bought Realm of Magic or the Get to Witching - the latter is an EP that brings back witches, because content is more recycled than ever before
>Loading screens now feature ads for packs you don't have
>NPC Sims will appear in game with content you don't own, including clothes, traits and life states. They lose this content if you add them to your household. This is to motivate you into buying content and complete your game
>Pop-up ads interrupt the game every three IRL hours
>Buy 3 tickets to the new Sims movie, and you'll get a code for a poster you can add to your game! Tickets start at $130 per person
>New meshes have not been created in 5 years. Every new item is a reskin of something else 
>Despite the last 15 years proving otherwise, Sims fans still hope they will acknowledge the Sim's 4 πst anniversary
>The Gallery's search features are so broken, they display content from inZoi
>The Simology panel now includes Disabilities, Psychoses, Fandoms, Religious Beliefs, Stomach Contents, Political Beliefs, and Satisfied With the Player's DLC Purchases meter. Opening the Simology panel crashes the game
>The Sims has a new TV show! Hopefully it will last longer than a season
>EAxis is under fire for their collab with a new make-up brand, as all of the IRL collab items leak nuclear waste
>EAxis refuses to comment. In fact, communication with EA has completely broken down
>On the plus side, we got leaks for EP 87: Get to Buying My Pet Second Stuff
>Still no cars