FC 27 Ice Skating?

Dear (in any case) EA

Have I missed something? Isn’t FC 27 supposed to be a football anymore, but ice skating?

If not, then why do the players slide around the pitch like a car that’s lost control on black ice, and you can’t even stop them with a manual control?

I went to the transfer market looking to buy Alexei Yagutin, but he wasn’t there. Then I went to the store hoping to find a deal for 999.9 FC points and a 350% discount to buy ice skating shoes, but nothing. 

If the field isn’t icy and it’s still just a football game, could it be that there’s some oil on it, making it slippery? Baby oil? Olive oil? EA oil? 

What's going on? I'm worried about my players' physical well-being. The way that the **bleep** pitch slides, he’s going to tear a knee—a torn ACL, a year on the sidelines—and what am I supposed to do then? I don’t have any more money for transfers. If I make one more, they’ll cut off my power, and I won’t be able to play, and you guys won’t be able to milk me for money either.

Do something right away—I’m begging you.

Thanks in advance for not answering.