Unplayable online due to lag

So me and my girl loaded the game up yesterday on 2 xboxs. Nat open on both. The first race was great and perfectly in sync. We went to a hideout then decided to do another race and unfortunantly completely out of sync. Its so bad that when I stayed next to my girls car while she was in first on her screen, on mine she was just sitting their, the cops busted her on my screen and on her screen it showed she was busted!! I'm guessing my Xbox was host. How ridiculous.