8 years ago
My thoughts on the Google x K-2SO deal
So I walked into a bar and tried to buy a drink. The bartender said, "Sorry sir, we can't sell you any alcohol. But if you're Mexican, we have free drinks for you."
I looked to my right, and there was a Mexican dude winking at me. "Drinks on the house, hermano."
Confused, I asked the bartender, "But why do they get free drinks and I can't even buy them?"
The bartender smoothly put on a Make America Great Again hat and replied, "Because Mexico paid for it."
"I'm sorry?"
"Mexico sponsored this bar, we now give exclusive drinks for Mexicans only. If you're not Mexican, you can't drink here. However, if you like, I can offer you a 4/50 of a glass of water for free?"
"I'm good, thanks, I'm hydrated enough."
Someone shouted, "Remember last month they gave a free shot of wine to Chinese people and a free shot of tequila to Mexicans? This is payback!"
Someone else yelled, "Yeah, go ask your own country to pay for your drinks, you f--king whiner!"
I looked back at the bartender. "Can I at least pay for a drink myself? I'm not asking for a free handout or anything."
Another guy looked up and sneered, "Get over it, genius. If you want a drink so bad, go set up your own brewery and drink all you want."
"Actually, I just heard back from my manager. We are allowed to sell you drinks, but it's going to cost you a bit more than usual."
"Like how much more?"
"Well, let's do some math here... 6000 pesos for 3/5 of a drink. So 10000 pesos for a drink."
"What?! That's crazy. First, I don't even have pesos, and secondly, I'm not paying that much."
"Oh come on! That's only about $480 in American money. Plus, I'll give you 25% more pesos value when you buy my drinks!"
As I turned around and walked out the door, I heard, "Make sure you hurry! The offer expires in 9d 16h!"
I looked to my right, and there was a Mexican dude winking at me. "Drinks on the house, hermano."
Confused, I asked the bartender, "But why do they get free drinks and I can't even buy them?"
The bartender smoothly put on a Make America Great Again hat and replied, "Because Mexico paid for it."
"I'm sorry?"
"Mexico sponsored this bar, we now give exclusive drinks for Mexicans only. If you're not Mexican, you can't drink here. However, if you like, I can offer you a 4/50 of a glass of water for free?"
"I'm good, thanks, I'm hydrated enough."
Someone shouted, "Remember last month they gave a free shot of wine to Chinese people and a free shot of tequila to Mexicans? This is payback!"
Someone else yelled, "Yeah, go ask your own country to pay for your drinks, you f--king whiner!"
I looked back at the bartender. "Can I at least pay for a drink myself? I'm not asking for a free handout or anything."
Another guy looked up and sneered, "Get over it, genius. If you want a drink so bad, go set up your own brewery and drink all you want."
"Actually, I just heard back from my manager. We are allowed to sell you drinks, but it's going to cost you a bit more than usual."
"Like how much more?"
"Well, let's do some math here... 6000 pesos for 3/5 of a drink. So 10000 pesos for a drink."
"What?! That's crazy. First, I don't even have pesos, and secondly, I'm not paying that much."
"Oh come on! That's only about $480 in American money. Plus, I'll give you 25% more pesos value when you buy my drinks!"
As I turned around and walked out the door, I heard, "Make sure you hurry! The offer expires in 9d 16h!"