Schemes and Dreams

The joy of serialized storytelling. I've had a few misteps and things I would have done differently in retrospect. It's challenging.

I think even if Nancy and Malcolm never appear again, they'll have done their part and done it well... and if you ever decide you need them, they'll be out there.

YIKES to all storylines here, Judith is definitely a tricky woman, and I don't envy those around her. She's completely self-obsessed and has ISSUES, and it makes me wonder what fame quirks she actually has in game - I'm thinking definitely that one that your sim has to look in the mirror every few hours, and the one where her emotions are explosive. Malcolm and Nancy... i don't even have the words. They're just deliciously evil. I can't believe they'd actually discuss the murder Mimi just for the crime of being herself and thriving, it shows the depth of their shame and discomfort - why can't they just let her be? Why must they publicly humiliate her?
I read the discussion about your intentions for them, and I get it. If you don't want them to be recurring characters in your story then whatever - leave them out. The writing process is a journey and we live and learn. Either way, I'm sure it was a fun exercise to write about their conversation and their intentions, even if you don't plan to take then much further than this.
As for Thorne and Octavia, he certainly seems like a handful.. imagine posing for the paps in your own home! Inviting them to invade your personal space without okaying it with your partner - Octavia was rightfully angry, but it sure is a shame that they caught her blowing up like that - that sure isn't going to do anything good for her reputation. I bet the tabloids will have a field day with this, smh.

Judith’s biggest problem is she’s never heard the word no. Her mother used Judith as a surrogate to realize her own failed dreams of fame and fortune. In the end she achieved that but she created a monster. Nancy and Malcolm are the dark heart of homophobia and transphobia. At the risk of giving away too much, Nancy will be the one walking away from their confrontation publicly humiliated. Mimi is already up there with Danielle and Londyn as favorites. Mimi has such a fascinating journey ahead. Thorne is all about Thorne. In his warped way he…I wouldn’t say he loves Octavia all that deeply, but he does care about her. He just can’t get over himself to truly love anybody. The two paps hatching their embellished story may not have quite the happy ending they’re expecting.?

Thanks for sharing that insight into Judith, Nancy, and others.

In my previous comment, I focused on Nancy being awful instead of Malcolm because she's Malcolm and Mimi's mother. I feel that there's something particularly awful about being so cruel to your child and then not correcting your other child when he talks casually about killing them (or only being against their murder for self-interested reasons). The parent is not parenting. But I definitely think Malcolm is awful too. Poor Mimi. <3

With AAVE - I don't know AAVE, but I wonder about when Octavia is most likely to use it. To me and I'd be curious to hear your perspective on this because everyone has an interesting perspective, Octavia would be most likely to use it around other African-Americans as well as close friends and least likely to use it when she's flustered or made angry by people of other races. I feel like most African-American women who work their way up are extremely sensitive to the ramifications of losing their cool in public and wouldn't really use AAVE in those situations because of how likely it is to be used against them and have already experienced tons of racist microaggressions against them - there's that whole angry black woman stereotype and people generally are more likely to see them as uneducated and undeserving, etc. because they're not using the English taught in school. I feel like the media may play into this stereotype of African-American women going off on non-African Americans using AAVE but I don't think that reflects reality. :confused: idk. I think African-American women are also less likely to use it with non-African Americans simply because the people they're frustrated with and trying to make a point to might not understand them. I'm personally very interested in languages and cross-cultural stuff so I often think about what languages/words people are likely to use and when/why.


ETA: Regardless, I feel particularly sad for Octavia here because her anger is justified, but those around her seem to either ignore/dismiss/gaslight her which should make someone angry (Thorne) or are going to take advantage of her anger to be able to paint her as the bad guy (Madison and Darrin) when all she did was yell and make them leave her house.

This is why I'm so scared to tackle this. You have a much better feel for this than I do. It's very scary trying to do something like this, because it is so easy to get this wrong and I do not want to offend anyone. I have a growing feeling that I got it wrong with her. I was nervous about even trying it at all and I haven't been comfortable with how it came out in this chapter. It's a part of her character and the others that I'm really not sure I should continue. This next chapter is going to feature Mimi and some of the other characters so I have some time to get more feedback and to do a lot more learning and deliberating before I get back to Octavia, Malaika, and Sheniqua.

You haven't caused any harm at all, but I think mistakes should be expected when people write about experiences that aren't their own. Wouldn't it be nice to have a team of editors, sensitivity readers, etc. like some professional authors have to help out? Since we don't have teams behind us, covering experiences that aren't our own is just going to be an ongoing challenge. I don't think you should stop writing diverse characters. Your stories are great. But I also don't think you should feel pressured to use AAVE if it's stressful. It doesn't necessarily add or subtract from any of the characters' authenticity.

Thank you for the encouragement. This is something I want to do, but I have so much to learn. I will wait until I feel better prepared before I try it again though. Getting it right and doing it respectfully is the only thing that matters.

I appreciate everything @haneul has said.

One thought I had, being from a big international city and now living in a small town, is that when you live in a big city you hear people talking differently from one another all the time. Everyone's got their own "accent" so to speak, whether it's the accent of their home country, or their home neighborhood, or the jargon of the people they hang out with. Racial differences are part of that but only part. You've created a big-city ensemble cast from many walks of life for your story. So if you think about the whole ensemble and the diversity of how they speak, you have a choice whether to show their individual accents by how words are spelled, or what slang they choose, etc. It does land a little oddly to have only Octavia's accent spelled out in that way.