Welcome to The Freezer Bunny Club! This reading circle is an open space for the members to share our stories and discuss them with each other. Each week, starting on Mondays, we will focus on reading/catching up on one of the stories. The author can post a list of discussion questions, and/or ask for advice, suggestions, or thoughts on certain aspects of their stories and writing in order to foster meaningful and constructive discussions. Though each of the stories will get the spotlight in a rotating fashion, general questions, happy sharing of screenshots, and cheering along of any of the stories in the circle at any time is also encouraged!
Our fifteenth week of discussion, from September 21st to 27th, is focused on Ridley Residence by @Skeilah!
Make sure to check the post below for detailed information about the stories and archived discussions. (The adorable freezer bunnies in the banner were made by SimLaughLove!)
Alright everyone... here's what I've got for KCLKF. Thank you so much for reading. I know everyone's at different places in the story, but for now, we'll say Arcs 1-7. If you can't quite make it by weeks end, that's fine. This story is intended to a coming-of-age tale (with fantasy, supernatural, crime/mystery elements included). It is also very loosely based on my own experiences as a younger teen/young adult.
General Questions: 1. All my Sims stories take place in the future (with an alternative history on Earth) on another planet (Simterra). What do you think of the worldbuilding? Does everything make sense? What additional questions do you have about the world building? 2. I put little Author's Notes at the bottom of every chapter. Are they useful? Do you like them? Do they help clarify things from the chapter? 3. The chapters are broken into arcs. Is this helpful? Do you find the breaks natural? (sometimes I use cliffhangers) >:) 4. What is your initial impression of Kass, my main character/the protagonist? 5. The first part of the story is most definitely slice-of-life with some elements of supernatural/fantasy and mystery thrown in. Do you like it? How is it similar or different to other slice-of-life stories you've read? 6. Any thoughts on my writing style? The length of chapters? The pacing?
What do you think of the Prologue (the first five chapters)? Do you feel like it gives you a good introduction to Kass, her family, and backstory? Do you have additional questions about her family/past?
What do you think of the introduction of Kass' relationship with her mom and sisters? Does it feel realistic? What about the introduction of her friends, Ayesha and Gage?
a) What are your thoughts about Clark? Thoughts about VJ? b) Andi and Kass discuss faith. What are your thoughts about my take on the Jacoban/Peteran faith from Sims Medieval? c) Andi and Kass also discuss dating and Kass proceeds to think about her love life. Did it feel realistic? d) Also, this arc introduces one of the many mysteries in this story. How do you think I handled its introduction?
a) Howard drops a bit of a shock on Kass. How do you feel about this father/daughter reunion? What about the introduction of EXCES? b) Amy struggles with depression. Did that show in the chapters? c) Kass also exhibits signs of anxiety. Does that show in the chapters? d) What do you think about Kass' job offer?
Okay now for some fun... a) what did you think of Kass and Ayesha's interactions? b) What about the meetup with Davis? How do you feel about a relationship between Kass and Davis? c) What about when the girls went to the high school to "spy?"
a) How do you think Kass' relationship with her family and friends are developing? What about with Davis? b) Any thoughts on the developing politics? c) Thoughts on the unfolding mysteries?
Other Questions to answer based on where you are (no spoilers in the questions really):
1. Kass is intended to be a flawed character. She isn't perfect, but I feel this makes her more realistic. Do her flaws annoy you or deepen her character? Or something else entirely? What do you see as her strengths/gifts? 2. Do you have a favorite character so far? Do you have a least favorite character? Who do you want to know more about? 3. Do you have a favorite scene/chapter thus far? 4. Any future predictions based on where you are in the story? 5. What questions do you have for me? Any other thoughts you'd like to share?
I'm going to do the questions in parts again. I just got to Arc 16, so I'm ahead. You'll have something to read every day and I won't overwhelm myself because there are quite a few questions.
General Questions
1. All my Sims stories take place in the future (with an alternative history on Earth) on another planet (Simterra). What do you think of the worldbuilding? Does everything make sense? What additional questions do you have about the world building?
I've said it before, but I love your worldbuilding. You insert so many intricate details, it feels like it's a place that actually exists. The politics, religion, mafia's, diseases, background stories. It really does feel like the Fullbright family (and everyone else) has lived a whole life before we got to read about their story. Right now, I don't have questions about the worldbuilding. Well, maybe one. How much of the supernatural elements present in the game do you use? It's clear aliens are a part of your world, but how about faries, vampires, werewolves etc.? So far, everything makes sense. You seem to have a knack for tackling questions I might have in your narrative.
I put little Author's Notes at the bottom of every chapter. Are they useful? Do you like them? Do they help clarify things from the chapter?
The author's notes are one of my favourite aspects of your story! I love reading what your fictional terms are based on, but I mostly love it when you tell us a little about your own life and how it influenced the story. I don't know if I'd call them useful per se. I don't need them to understand the story, but I do like them. I roll with whatever you give me in the actual text.
3. The chapters are broken into arcs. Is this helpful? Do you find the breaks natural? (sometimes I use cliffhangers) >:)
Hm, I'm not so sure about the arcs myself. For an arc, I think about a story arc which in my mind means it's a smaller part of a bigger story. I feel like you might have too many. They could be bigger than they are right now. I don't know if arc is the right word. I can't specifically remember a cliffhanger at the end of one of first seven arcs, but I do remember that I got excited to read the next arc the following day. They do provide a nice stopping point for me.
4. What is your initial impression of Kass, my main character/the protagonist?
I think you might have noticed, but my initial impression of Kass wasn't great. I don't think she starts out particularly likable. She's definitely realistic, but she wouldn't be someone I'd want to hang out with. It's the immature way of going about things she sometimes has that annoys me. Maybe I would have liked her more when I was still somewhat immature and younger, but I feel like she might fall in the 'too young for me' category at this time in my life. She does have her likable moments though. I am getting more used to her throughout the story and I can she is improving. I hope she becomes even more mature later on.
5. The first part of the story is most definitely slice-of-life with some elements of supernatural/fantasy and mystery thrown in. Do you like it? How is it similar or different to other slice-of-life stories you've read?
I love slice-of-life. It's my favourite genre to read. I'm nosey, so I love feeling like I'm bursting into someone's life and getting to know everything about them. Drama's and soap opera's are some of my favourite shows to watch. I feel like I never want the story to end because I get so attached to the characters. I have less of that with stories from other genres whether that be on TV or in books/simlit. I think yours differs from other slice-of-life's I have read because it includes some mysteries. I don't think I've encountered a whole lot of that before. It's a nice change of pace and it keeps me wondering what's going to happen next. I'm not majorly attached to the characters yet though, but that might still come.
6. Any thoughts on my writing style? The length of chapters? The pacing?
You write clear prose. It's much more detailed than the way I write, but I like it. You describe people Kass sees in the café or on the street, how they look, what they're wearing. It makes for a lively and realistic story which I'm here for. Sometimes I feel like the chapters go on for a little too long, especially if there are no pictures to break it up but I've still managed to finish an arc a day so you kept me reading anyway.
The pacing was something I had to get used to. I haven't read something before that included so many chapters/parts going over a single day. I expected Kass to go to college pretty soon after starting, but that wasn't the case. I'm on arc 15 and we're on June 10th now and we started on, what, June 1st? So, it's going pretty slow but I don't mind, really. As long as the story stays interesting. I am hoping for a time skip at some point though.
What do you think of the Prologue (the first five chapters)? Do you feel like it gives you a good introduction to Kass, her family, and backstory? Do you have additional questions about her family/past?
The prologue included some of my favourite chapters. I remember feeling an affinity for Kass' grandpa after reading her description of him and I was so excited to meet him later on. The way you formatted it into an essay was something I thought was super unique and I loved reading Kass' writing. It did provide a great introduction. It gave me a good starting point to see what Kass' had experienced up until that point and we could really take off from there. I think I asked all of my questions in the comments on your blog. Maybe this one: What was Kass like when she was little? We haven't seen them as kids very much. What did Kass like as a kid, how was her relationship with her siblings etc.? I think it'd give some good context of who Kass grew up to be.
What do you think of the introduction of Kass' relationship with her mom and sisters? Does it feel realistic? What about the introduction of her friends, Ayesha and Gage?
I'm having a hard time remembering what happened in Arc 2 and how everyone was introduced, so I'll have to go back and look.
Right. I didn't like Amy very much, because of the way she dealt with the situation where one of the sisters stole Kass' stuff. She did still seem like a real mom though. Kass seemed to love her a whole lot and care for her. Kass' relationship with Andi is my favourite, although I like Carina as a standalone character more. Carina is sassy and pessimistic which I can relate to, but I feel like Kass and Andi get along better. Carina feels more troubled than either of them.
When we meet Ayesha, it feels like Kass and her are polar opposites and have nothing in common except growing up together. I like the way they tease each other and hang out. I think a lot of people have friends they grew up with who turned out to have completely different interests. You can grow apart or stay friends and I'm glad Kass and Ayesha stayed friends (so far). We obviously saw Gage immediately get into a fight with Kass. I felt like both parties were in the wrong there. Gage could have feigned some understanding for Kass and vice versa, actually. It shows that both sides have some maturing to do and try and work on their communication skills if they want to have this long-distance friendship. Miscommunication happens more often over the phone than in real life, because you can't see someone's face. So a better communication face-to-face might a step in the right direction already. I'm not a huge fan of Gage myself, but I'm glad Kass has such a good friend in him.
1. All my Sims stories take place in the future (with an alternative history on Earth) on another planet (Simterra). What do you think of the worldbuilding? Does everything make sense? What additional questions do you have about the world building? It took me a while (read: the author notes) to realize I was reading something in the future, and at first I was a little confused because of all those names I didn’t knew, but all of my questions while reading were taken away while reading the author’s notes. If those weren’t there, I don’t know if I would understand a thing about it, but now I do!
2. I put little Author's Notes at the bottom of every chapter. Are they useful? Do you like them? Do they help clarify things from the chapter? For me personally they are SUPER useful. Like I said up here, without those, I think I would be lost in the story, making things up myself.
3. The chapters are broken into arcs. Is this helpful? Do you find the breaks natural? (sometimes I use cliffhangers) >:) I only read the first arc by now but I think they are helpful. It makes everything more easy to read for me (I am a simple minded person hehe). At first I didn’t really knew what arcs were (because I don’t use them myself) so my simple mind was a little confused. But now that I get it, I think for your story, they are useful.
4. What is your initial impression of Kass, my main character/the protagonist? I like how you include things that happened to yourself in Kass her life story. It makes it so real and to some things I can relate so much already. I’m like diving into a story where parts of it could be my own life. I already like Kass a lot because of all the realness in the story, in her story. I’m looking forward to the rest!
5. The first part of the story is most definitely slice-of-life with some elements of supernatural/fantasy and mystery thrown in. Do you like it? How is it similar or different to other slice-of-life stories you’ve read? I liked it, but I’m mostly looking forward to the rest of the story. For me, the first part of the story is just to understand everything, and the rest is the actual story. Like, you need to go through this to know the rest? Positive thing: I’ve read stories without a prologue. So, there’s a whole family and I don’t know anything about it and I need to find it out all by myself. I liked the fact that everything was written in front of me without the need to search everything, write everything down, …
This is why I like to start with only one sim, without a family (like Liz) and the family will build itself while playing the game. No need to explain things, hahahahaha!
6. Any thoughts on my writing style? The length of chapters? The pacing? At first I’m always like ‘oof that looks long’ but I’m done reading before I know it. I really like your writing style and the length of the chapters is great! It’s totally different from how I write but I don’t always like my own writing, hahaha. You’re going into detail just enough to understand everything and not make it boring.
What do you think of the Prologue (the first five chapters)? Do you feel like it gives you a good introduction to Kass, her family, and backstory? Do you have additional questions about her family/past? It took me a while and I’m sure I’ll forget some parts, but I can search them up again and I think I got the main things in my mind to go on with the rest of the story. You did a good job on the prologue :)
Sul sul everyone! I wanted to let you know I have a non-spoiler family tree available on my blog now. I'm working on finishing up the main characters profiles and general character lists. I had hoped to finish over the weekend, but it didn't happen.
General Questions:
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote: I'm going to do the questions in parts again. I just got to Arc 16, so I'm ahead. You'll have something to read every day and I won't overwhelm myself because there are quite a few questions.
Yes, take your time. No rush. Thanks for reading ahead.
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote:
I've said it before, but I love your worldbuilding. You insert so many intricate details, it feels like it's a place that actually exists. The politics, religion, mafia's, diseases, background stories. It really does feel like the Fullbright family (and everyone else) has lived a whole life before we got to read about their story.
Thank you so much. That's great to hear! I hoped the Riviera/Fullbright family would feel realistic and like someone you might know. I had a lot of fun developing the world and the background for KCLKF (and its subsequent larger world - Simterra).
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote: Right now, I don't have questions about the worldbuilding. Well, maybe one. How much of the supernatural elements present in the game do you use? It's clear aliens are a part of your world, but how about faries, vampires, werewolves etc.? So far, everything makes sense. You seem to have a knack for tackling questions I might have in your narrative.
Yes! All supernaturals exist in this world, and some make appearances later. Each supernatural group has a "parent" race, if you will. There are other aliens in this universe/star system. So for example, if you've read 1.17, Abe makes a comment about Kass moving "like a bat out of Titanav" (the Kr'v homeworld). Vampires or (the politically correct term would be) pyres are half Sim/half Kr'v. The Kr'v are a vampiric alien race that live in the star system.
There are others mentioned throughout KCLKF briefly like extraterrestrials or XT's are a cross-breed of Xekzoi(the main aliens, the ominous "big bad" - the green skins) and Sims. The fae are half Sim/half Satur. Enchanters/spellcasters are half Sim/half Norn. And so on.
@everyone Actually you can read up on all the aliens/supernaturals in my Simworld over on my other blog here... if anyone's interested. I'll eventually have full articles devoted to each species/race.
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote:
Hm, I'm not so sure about the arcs myself. For an arc, I think about a story arc which in my mind means it's a smaller part of a bigger story. I feel like you might have too many. They could be bigger than they are right now. I don't know if arc is the right word. I can't specifically remember a cliffhanger at the end of one of first seven arcs, but I do remember that I got excited to read the next arc the following day. They do provide a nice stopping point for me.
Yeah, I thought about calling them "parts" instead of "arcs." That would probably make a lot more sense. :sweat_smile: I will definitely keep this in mind when I write the next story in the series.
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote:
I think you might have noticed, but my initial impression of Kass wasn't great. I don't think she starts out particularly likable. She's definitely realistic, but she wouldn't be someone I'd want to hang out with. It's the immature way of going about things she sometimes has that annoys me. Maybe I would have liked her more when I was still somewhat immature and younger, but I feel like she might fall in the 'too young for me' category at this time in my life. She does have her likable moments though. I am getting more used to her throughout the story and I can she is improving. I hope she becomes even more mature later on.
Kass will mature over time, but it's probably going to happen slowly so it may not be as quick as you (or I) like. I think some of Kass' immaturity can be attributed to her fairly sheltered life and her controlling grandparents/parent. She's also dealing with neglect and abuse to some extent. However, she needs to own her choices and be more sensitive to others feelings/thoughts/wishes. It doesn't help that her mamma doesn't exactly do this. Kass, in many respects, is a product of nature/nurture (her family and her environment). This is very much a coming-of-age point in her life, and she's not handling things gracefully just yet.
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote:
I love slice-of-life. It's my favourite genre to read. I'm nosey, so I love feeling like I'm bursting into someone's life and getting to know everything about them. Drama's and soap opera's are some of my favourite shows to watch. I feel like I never want the story to end because I get so attached to the characters. I have less of that with stories from other genres whether that be on TV or in books/simlit. I think yours differs from other slice-of-life's I have read because it includes some mysteries. I don't think I've encountered a whole lot of that before. It's a nice change of pace and it keeps me wondering what's going to happen next. I'm not majorly attached to the characters yet though, but that might still come.
I remember some mystery/elements of crime in some dramas/soap operas, but probably not slice-of-life. Kass's story is only partly slice-of-life and as I go on, it gets less so to some extent. Hopefully, you'll get attached to at least one or two of the characters. :grimace:
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote:
You write clear prose. It's much more detailed than the way I write, but I like it. You describe people Kass sees in the café or on the street, how they look, what they're wearing. It makes for a lively and realistic story which I'm here for. Sometimes I feel like the chapters go on for a little too long, especially if there are no pictures to break it up but I've still managed to finish an arc a day so you kept me reading anyway.
I have several pictureless chapters. I think I said in a comment over on the blog that it's usually when a) my imagination runs away with me, or b) I can't quite capture what I want in game. Long chapters are kinda my thing. :grimace: There are probably sections I could cut or even whole chapters, but at the end of the day, this is me writing SimLit for fun and not for a work-type setting so I usually write until it feels done.
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote:
The pacing was something I had to get used to. I haven't read something before that included so many chapters/parts going over a single day. I expected Kass to go to college pretty soon after starting, but that wasn't the case. I'm on arc 15 and we're on June 10th now and we started on, what, June 1st? So, it's going pretty slow but I don't mind, really. As long as the story stays interesting. I am hoping for a time skip at some point though.
I won't really time skip like you're hoping until the next story actually. This was a deliberate stylistic choice on my part. Mostly because by the middle-end there's so much to resolve. I didn't really think too much about how much time is spent in one day. I more so focus on letting the story unfold (in my mind) naturally, which sometimes means I dwell on a certain day for awhile. We started on May 27th. By the end of arc 16, we're on June 11th. (FYI, I have 13 months in my Sim world calendar of 28 days).
"Skeilah;c-17568058" wrote:
It took me a while (read: the author notes) to realize I was reading something in the future, and at first I was a little confused because of all those names I didn’t knew, but all of my questions while reading were taken away while reading the author’s notes. If those weren’t there, I don’t know if I would understand a thing about it, but now I do!
Opps... I hoped it was straightforward, but if you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask.
"Skeilah;c-17568058" wrote:
I like how you include things that happened to yourself in Kass her life story. It makes it so real and to some things I can relate so much already. I’m like diving into a story where parts of it could be my own life. I already like Kass a lot because of all the realness in the story, in her story. I’m looking forward to the rest!
I tried to draw from my own late teens/early adulthood experiences for writing Kass. In a way, I started writing her story as therapy, a way to work through stuff that happened to me. When I started playing the Sims and then writing Kass' story, I rediscovered a love for writing (and even myself) that I had lost. It helped me remember how much I love telling stories. I'm glad you're enjoying it.
"Skeilah;c-17568058" wrote:
I liked it, but I’m mostly looking forward to the rest of the story. For me, the first part of the story is just to understand everything, and the rest is the actual story. Like, you need to go through this to know the rest? Positive thing: I’ve read stories without a prologue. So, there’s a whole family and I don’t know anything about it and I need to find it out all by myself. I liked the fact that everything was written in front of me without the need to search everything, write everything down, …
This is why I like to start with only one sim, without a family (like Liz) and the family will build itself while playing the game. No need to explain things, hahahahaha!
Oh I wish I could write like that. But I feel like every Sim, every character, deserves to have their story told. I find myself wondering about their lives, their families, their dreams, their backgrounds... and then I go down the rabbit hole. :grimace: :lol: But I enjoy doing it so...
"Skeilah;c-17568058" wrote:
At first I’m always like ‘oof that looks long’ but I’m done reading before I know it. I really like your writing style and the length of the chapters is great! It’s totally different from how I write but I don’t always like my own writing, hahaha. You’re going into detail just enough to understand everything and not make it boring.
I am a long chapters kind-of gal. I know not everyone has that desire to write long chapters or read them, especially in SimLit. When I started writing, I started writing for me as a therapeutic way to deal with some stuff that happened a long time ago. I was also coming out of a really horrible job when I started writing KCLKF the first time and I had lost a lot of confidence. I started writing again as a way to bounce back and rediscover something I loved. So I didn't care much about chapter length. This time around, I've been a little more deliberate but I didn't want to lose the essence of the original so much of the chapters are told at the original length (or eek... longer). I tend to just write until it feels finished and sometimes that's really long (even for me).
The prologue included some of my favourite chapters. I remember feeling an affinity for Kass' grandpa after reading her description of him and I was so excited to meet him later on. The way you formatted it into an essay was something I thought was super unique and I loved reading Kass' writing. It did provide a great introduction. It gave me a good starting point to see what Kass' had experienced up until that point and we could really take off from there. I think I asked all of my questions in the comments on your blog. Maybe this one: What was Kass like when she was little? We haven't seen them as kids very much. What did Kass like as a kid, how was her relationship with her siblings etc.? I think it'd give some good context of who Kass grew up to be.
There are actually some chapters with Kass as a kid. One you should've already read in Arc 9 with the girls at their grandparents summer cabin in Moonlight Falls. There's one or two more in the story. Kass was a very independent and inquisitive child. She also is a bit fiery and stubborn. Kass has always been pretty close with her sisters so this is the first time in her life where they're starting to grow apart and it's hard for everyone. They enjoyed playing games and dressing up and pranking each other. Kass has also always enjoyed reading, particularly fantasy adventure, and writing (and subsequently research). Language arts was her best school subject, but she struggled in school around the age of 9 because she was bored and needed to be challenged. She changed to a private school and that helped.
I didn't like Amy very much, because of the way she dealt with the situation where one of the sisters stole Kass' stuff. She did still seem like a real mom though. Kass seemed to love her a whole lot and care for her.
You're not exactly meant to like or understand Amy. She's got some major unresolved issues that spill out into her wishy-washy parenting. Sometimes she's too strict, and sometimes she's incredibly lax. She's also checked out a lot of the time (mostly due to undiagnosed/untreated depression and anxiety).
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote: Kass' relationship with Andi is my favourite, although I like Carina as a standalone character more. Carina is sassy and pessimistic which I can relate to, but I feel like Kass and Andi get along better. Carina feels more troubled than either of them.
I love Cari! She's based pretty much on my middle sister and that's exactly how my sister was when she was Cari's age! I did have a super close relationship with my kid sister when I was younger, so that part heavily influences Andi's/Kass' relationship.
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote: When we meet Ayesha, it feels like Kass and her are polar opposites and have nothing in common except growing up together. I like the way they tease each other and hang out. I think a lot of people have friends they grew up with who turned out to have completely different interests. You can grow apart or stay friends and I'm glad Kass and Ayesha stayed friends (so far).
I made a lot of comments about Ayesha/Kass' friendship over on the blog so I won't add too much here. While they are opposites in many respects, opposites do sometimes attract. They do genuinely care for each other and as you'll see in later chapters, while Ayesha likes to have fun, she can also tell it how it is and she isn't afraid to hold back. Something Kass needs.
"Duvelina;c-17567953" wrote: We obviously saw Gage immediately get into a fight with Kass. I felt like both parties were in the wrong there. Gage could have feigned some understanding for Kass and vice versa, actually. It shows that both sides have some maturing to do and try and work on their communication skills if they want to have this long-distance friendship. Miscommunication happens more often over the phone than in real life, because you can't see someone's face. So a better communication face-to-face might a step in the right direction already. I'm not a huge fan of Gage myself, but I'm glad Kass has such a good friend in him.
I would say for Gage, they tend to bring out the worst in each other sometimes, and other times I think they bring out the best. You'll see a chapter later (when Kass is a kid) and meets Gage. Minor spoiler alert. They get into a fight. I think that's part of the "thrill" for Gage, but it may not be the best for Kass. He's an argumentative kind-of guy, but Kass can be pretty insensitive too.
You're probably right. Miscommunication can happen more readily over the phone or via text/computer messages. However, it does happen sometimes face to face, especially when one or both parties is in denial about something (which is what's happening often with Kass and Gage).
Hi @AdamsEve1231 ! I'm really liking your story so far, but I'm not that far in yet so I want to catch up a bit more before answering your questions. Expect an essay of a post somewhere around Friday. :smiley:
a) What are your thoughts about Clark? Thoughts about VJ?
I had a bad feeling about Clark, just like Kass. But I think that's mostly because we see things from Kass' perspective.
VJ seems like a good guy. We haven't seen a lot of him, but I feel like he'll treat Andi right.
b) Andi and Kass discuss faith. What are your thoughts about my take on the Jacoban/Peteran faith from Sims Medieval?
I have played TSM, but never very much with the Jacoban and Peteran priests, so I didn't know much about those faiths anyway. For me it feels like you've invented some sims religions and I'm fine with that. Can't say much about your take on them.
c) Andi and Kass also discuss dating and Kass proceeds to think about her love life. Did it feel realistic?
It did feel realistic. I think it might be one of my favourite conversations so far. My sister is 11 years older than I am, so we were never very close. I've certainly never had those kind of conversations with her, so I can't speak from my own experience but I didn't 'cringe' or anything. Sometimes conversations can feel very forced in stories, so you don't want to read it because something like this would never happen in real life. I don't have that with your story. I feel like the dialogue is realistic and could for sure happen. I could relate to Kass' thoughts about focusing on her studies and not really dating in high school. I did date, but I didn't date anyone inside my own school because that'd have been so awkward when it would have inevitably gone wrong. School always came first though.
d) Also, this arc introduces one of the many mysteries in this story. How do you think I handled its introduction?
Are you referring to the mystery surrounding Clark? Oh man, that was really just the beginning. Mystery after mystery keeps popping up. My poor heart is waiting for revelations. I love it. It keeps up the pace and always makes you wonder about something. This introduction to the mystery of who Clark was made me doubt him just as much as Kass did. So that's a sign of good writing.
What are your thoughts about Davis? Did you like his interlude?
YES. My opinion of Davis is coloured in by what I've seen of him in future arcs but I adore Davis. I wasn't so sure of him at first, but he turned out to be such a fun character. I hope Kass will stick with him (and not Gage). I like stepping out of Kass' head and seeing the situation from someone else's perspective and Davis' interlude did that. It made me like him more. Gage's interlude did the same thing, although I don't like Gage as much.
