You misremember. It is possible to specify custom pronouns but for relationships you are stuck with what they now feel that you should refer to your wife/husband as. I don't understand why they didn't just add Spouse to the relationship dropdown in the name of inclusion instead of deliberately choosing to exclude everyone that would prefer they could still call their wife their wife and their husband their husband. But you are right since it was done deliberately it definitely is not a bug so belongs in feedback.