Removing NPCs from my household

Urg so this situation is a bit frustrating lol.

I meant for my second sim to become my first sims husband, but instead I clicked friendship.

At the time my “roommate” was a female and I didn’t think that I could change the gender and such. So to do the quest I found another sim to marry which happened to be the same sim that my other sim was in a toxic relationship with.

I’ve since changed my ”roommate” to look like my actual husband and I would love to be able to be in a relationship with that sim.

Lmao but I accidentally clicked friendship when it was still a female and that doesn’t go away I guess.

So really I guess I have two questions.

Is there anyway for me to kick out my first sims husband he is non playable. I wouldn’t mind it so much but being him and my then female “roommate” had a fling they hit on each other. Which is mega weird now that the sim is a HE LOL

The second question is if not can I retire my first sim (the wife of this rogue sim) and that guy disappear and I make a new me. Sorry guys this is kinda confusing and I apologize. 

I was able to edit the edit the rogue sims appearance, but not the physical features. Basically the sim I married has a different eye color than my husband in real life, is scrawny not muscled at all, and has big ears. Otherwise I guess I wouldn’t care too much. Too bad you’re not allowed to COMPLETELY edit them.

I don’t know if another option would be to retire the “roommate” and promote the rogue sim. Would that give me full customization?