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6 years ago

Thanksgiving and Black Friday 2018: Walkthrough

Bird-Brained Schemes

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Homer: Oh man, I got a great deal on this Thanksgiving turkey -- it weighs 90 pounds!
Lisa: You didn’t get a deal, you got an Emu.
Homer: Is that like a Groupon?
Lisa: No, it’s a vicious bird!
Homer: Yeah, a delicious bird.
Lisa: Ugh, why do you keep misinterpreting everything I say?!
Homer: Because this giant turkey keeps squawking!
Lisa: It’s an Emu, and you have to return it!

Task: Make Homer "Return" Thanksgiving "Turkey"
Time: 4h
Location: Springfield Retirement Castle or Brown House

Kent Brockman: Emu-vin’ on up! A wild Emu has been living in the Retirement Castle for over a week.
Kent Brockman: After inspecting its cramped living conditions, officials say the Emu and residents can no longer be categorized as “Free Range".

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Blood is Thinner Than Gravy Pt. 1

Moe starts

Moe: Ah, my favorite time of the month: Calendar Flipping Day.
Moe: This calendar next to it to lets me know when to flip the page.
Homer: Wow, the whole month of November, and not one social event written down. Not even Thanksgiving dinner.
Moe: Yeah, I keep my life extra lonely to, uh, save on ink...
Moe: Yeah, sure. I'm living the American Dream.
Homer: I think I understand what you’re hinting at, Moe.
Moe: You do?
Homer: Sure! You’re more than welcome to use my pen in case someone invites you over!

Task: Make Homer Ignore Moe's Cry for Help
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Task: Prep Meals

Moe: Least I can use the pen to sign the foreclosure papers on my house.
Moe: Aw nuts, it doesn’t work.
Morty: Speaking of not working, retired life is treating me great!
Moe: How’d you get in here?!
Marv: Also speaking of not working, your lock is broken.
Minnie: Dad already used that set-up, dummy!
Moe: Now my whole family's here?! And they’re doing shtick?!
Moe: This is worse than spending every waking moment of my existence alone.

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Blood is Thinner Than Gravy Pt. 2

Moe starts

Moe: And here I thought making this bar look family-friendly would've scared you rodents off.
Morty: Why would you start a "family business" without involving your family?
Moe: ‘Cause none of your business!
Morty: But I know all the ins and outs: stab your enemy and move the knife in and out.
Moe: I don’t got time to talk to youse. I gotta do something much less off-putting: clean the terlets.

Task: Make Moe Avoid His Family
Time: 4h
Location: Uncle Moe's Family Feedbag
Task: Prep Meals

Moe: I thought bringing back Uncle Moe's Family Feedbag would bring families to me on the holidays.
Moe: Instead all I get are these childless millennials that only order avocado toast.
Moe: Eh, at least I can pass off these spoiled potatoes as avocados.

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Blood is Thinner Than Gravy Pt. 3

Marge starts

Marge: Homer, what I’m about to say isn’t easy for me...
Homer: You’re leaving me?! Please, baby, I can change!
Homer: Oh, who am I kidding, I can’t change. You’re better off without me--
Marge: I’m not leaving! I was going to say you should invite Moe to Thanksgiving!
Homer: Oh.
Marge: Glad to know you’d give up on our marriage so fast...
Homer: Baby, I can change! Actually, maybe you’re better off--
Marge: Just ask Moe to dinner!

Task: Make Moe Spend Thanksgiving at the Simpsons
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Task: Prep Meals
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Blood is Thinner Than Gravy Pt. 4

Minnie starts

Minnie: This is quite a lovely event you’ve planned, Marge. Where’d you hire these tiny butlers?
Marge: They’re my children.
Minnie: You think I could book ‘em for my Uncensored Russian Dash Cam Car Accident movie night?
Bart: I start at fifty dollars a day, plus expenses.
Marge: No! Minnie, why don’t you help me in the kitchen?
Minnie: I don’t cook -- I usually drink my dinner -- but I suppose I could learn to do both.

Task: Make Minnie Drink and Help Marge in the Kitchen
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Task: Prep Meals

Minnie: I gotta tell ya, I’m pretty useless in the kitchen.
Marge: You must have some skills. Have you ever peeled a carrot or diced an onion?
Minnie: I’ve peeled out in a car after cheating at dice against a guy named Onion...
Marge: Kinda convenient the guy’s name was Onion...
Marge: Let’s just start with some stirring.

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Blood is Thinner Than Gravy Pt. 5

Moe starts

Moe: Everything is delicious, Midge! What’s your secret?
Marge: Ask your sister. She was quite the helper!
Moe: Wow, Minnie, I’m impressed. I woulda thought you’d be in there cookin’ up drugs or something!
Minnie: I was!
Moe: Whaaaaa?
Minnie: When Marge turned her back, I stirred some pot in the pot.
Homer: That, and only that, explains why I’ve already eaten four helpings!
Moe: Minnie, you ruined dinner! That’s it, put your loafers up!

Task: Make Minnie and Moe Have a Shoe Fight
Time: 8h
Location: Mattress King Dinner Table
Requires: Moe
Task: Prep Meals

Marge: Stop! You’re getting shoe polish on my good napkins!
Moe: Sorry about that, Midge. We Szyslaks have our own code of justice.
Marge: Does it always involve shoe-slapping?!
Moe: Yes.

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Blood is Thinner Than Gravy Pt. 6

Marge starts

Marge: This is terrible! All the Thanksgiving food has been spiked. Plus Minnie put drugs in the dinner before the shoe-fight.
Marge: Oh no, the kids!
Minnie: Relax, I didn’t put any pot in the kid’s food.
Marge: Phew...
Minnie: I put ADD meds in theirs.
Bart: I just wrote essays about the first through tenth Thanksgivings!
Homer: Who cares about the boy’s education -- where are we going to get food?!
Moe: Well, we could go to the saddest place in town...
Homer: The homeless food pantry?
Moe: Sadder. The Taste of Springfield Festival on Thanksgiving day.

Task: Make Simpsons Visit Taste of Springfield
Time: 8h
Location: Taste of Springfield Festival
Task: Make Szyslaks Visit Taste of Springfield
Time: 8h
Location: Taste of Springfield Festival

On job start:
Marge: This is awful. Our Thanksgiving tradition is ruined!
Homer: Look, they do wine tasting.
Marge: Ooh, maybe I can become one of those acceptable alcoholic moms!
Marge: Hooray for new Thanksgiving traditions!

On job end:
Moe: Well, Minnie, you found a way to put your own twist on Thanksgiving.
Moe: It was violent, rage-filled, and borderline illegal, but ain’t that what this holiday is really about?
Homer: And you brought our family closer together...
Bart: We’re taking turns holding Mom’s hair back while she barfs up all that wine!

Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP

Recipe for Criticism Pt. 1

Minnie starts

Minnie: That Taste of Springfield festival inspired me!
Minnie: If those bozos can make a living cooking food, so can I!
Minnie: Marge taught me how to stir, but there’s gotta be more to it than that...
LunchLadyDora: No, it’s mostly stirring. And some slopping. And lots of yelling at people to eat the food.
Minnie: Yeah, but you’re not making the big bucks.
Minnie: I’ll learn to cook from the same place I get my medical treatment: the Internet.

Task: Make Minnie Learn to Cook
Time: 4h

Minnie: Cooking is a hassle. I’ve got flour all over my face and I wasn’t even cooking with it!
Minnie: I need to try a different approach.
Minnie: I’ll become a chef the Szyslak way.

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Recipe for Criticism Pt. 2

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Minnie: Please, you’ve got to teach me about being a chef.
Krusty: Me? It's been years since I touched a pan...and that was to smack Julia Child when she got handsy during a segment on Carson.
Minnie: Exactly! You don’t cook, yet your name’s on everything from the burgers to the toilet paper.
Krusty: That's cause they're made from the same stuff.
Krusty: All right, I’ll teach you everything I know!

Task: Reach Level 7 and Place Krusty Burger
Task: Make Krusty teach Minnie About the Restaurant Business
Time: 1h
Location: Krusty Burger
Requires: Minnie

Minnie: Wow, that really didn’t take long at all.
Minnie: Like, a shockingly short amount of time.
Krusty: Turns out I don’t really know anything.
Minnie: You’re worthless!
Krusty: Hey! Now you’re getting the hang of running a restaurant! Screaming at people who are trying their best!

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Recipe for Criticism Pt. 3

Minnie starts

Minnie: Stupid online lessons and know-nothing clown.
Minnie: I just want to bring people joy through food, which I hate and have no passion for! Why is this so hard?!
Luigi: Why don’t you try some of my pasta? Best in town!
Minnie: Wow, this takes my mind off my troubles... and puts it on how bad this pasta is!
Luigi: But... it’s my momma’s secret recipe!
Luigi: She taught me you poke holes in the plastic before you put it in the microwave.

Task: Make Minnie Leave a Bad Online Review
Time: 12h
Location: Luigi's or Brown House

Minnie: Wow, telling that guy his food is terrible really picked up my spirits.
Minnie: Although I do feel bad about badmouthing his dear old mother on the Internet...
Minnie: Because she doesn’t go online, so she won’t know how bad I trashed her!

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Recipe for Criticism Pt. 4

Minnie starts

Minnie: Man, my post about Luigi’s is blowing up faster than The Hindenburg...
Minnie: ...that German restaurant I also trashed online.
Minnie: Face it: I was never gonna be a master chef. Cooking just isn't a skill I was born with.
Minnie: But tearing down people’s dreams with my words?
Minnie: I'm a natural!

Task: Make Minnie Become a Social Media Food Critic
Time: 1h
Location: Moe's Tavern

Minnie: I thought I’d be good at this, but I never dreamed I’d be great.
Minnie: Unfortunately I’m too great. The restaurants I reviewed all went out of business.

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Recipe for Criticism Pt. 5

Minnie starts

Minnie: What will I do now? I don’t know how to cook, I can’t trash other people’s cooking...
Minnie: Guess my career in the food business is over.
Luigi: Good riddance! When momma catches up with you, she’s gonna drive you outta town!
Minnie: Wait a minute, that gives me an idea!
Luigi: Don’t hurt momma, she’s-a all talk!
Minnie: No, I’m going to get a job driving around making food deliveries!

Task: Make Minnie Work For A Food Delivery App
Time: 24h
Location: Kwik-E-Mart

Minnie: This is great! I get to eat all the loose french fries I want, infuriate people by being late...
Minnie: And when I’m bored, I’ll screw up people’s orders on purpose.
Minnie: I love the food biz!

Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP

Golden Opportunity Pt. 1

Homer starts

Homer: Marge, kids, come quick!
Marge: What's wrong? Is it the big one? Are you finally having the stroke your doctor has been warning you about?
Homer: Well that might be happening too, but check this out... I got a Golden Token in the mail!
Homer: I guess that means I either inherited a golden coin factory, or we're about to be pulled into a charming fantasy story.
Lisa: The note says you can spend it on a Golden Mystery box.
Homer: Oh. Well at least we won't have to read a bunch of text.
System Message: You have recieved a free Golden Token! Spend it on the Golden Mystery Box for a huge reward!

Quest reward: 1 Golden Token

Task: Spend a Golden Token on a Golden Mystery Box

System Message: More Golden Tokens can be purchased with limited time donut bundles!
System Message: Purchase Donuts to earn unique items, including a Donut-generating Lard Lad Factory!

Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Golden Opportunity Pt. 2

Homer starts

Homer: The Golden Mystery Box is gone.
Bart: What are you gonna do with the tokens?
Homer: I tried using them in a payphone to see if I could travel back in time like Bill & Ted, but instead I just traveled back in time like stupid Doctor Who.
Lisa: Wait, are you saying the tokens give you the power to harness time travel--
Homer: Ooh, I can trade them in for donuts!
System Message: Unused Golden Tokens can be traded in for donuts in the store!

Task: Spend a Golden Token on Donuts
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP

Golden Opportunity Pt. 3

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Task: Spend a Golden Token on Donuts
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
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