Treehouse of Horror XXVIII: Walkthrough
A Bull in a Magic Shop Pt. 1
Auto starts
Lisa: I still need a wand, robe, an animal familiar, a couple books...
Homer: Heck no. I'm not wasting my “I'm-faking-a-sick-day” to take you costume shopping. Halloween is so far away it scares me. Eeeagggh! See. Scared.
Lisa: But if I don't start work on it now, it'll just be a dumb costume. I need cosplay grade or better this year.
Bart: Why are you trying so hard to impress the weird anime kids? And the weirder adults?
Lisa: If you ever become part of a real fandom, you'll understand.
Task: Make Lisa Use Fandom Powers to Annoy Homer
Time: 6s
Location: Simpson House
Requires: Homer
Lisa: There's even a new district called Charmer's Market in town that panders to everything I'm gushing about. Can we go? Can we? Can we?
Homer: No. Not in a million years. Not even if my Dad particles are teleported there and back... No!
Lisa: But they have a ton of junk food, just with stupid fancy-sounding names.
Homer: Sounds stupid-endous! And even dumb-licious!
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
A Bull in a Magic Shop Pt. 2
Homer starts
Homer: So, let's get this dress shopping over with. Where to? How ‘bout the nearest computer? You can buy things online, like a normie millennial.
Lisa: Where's the thrill in that? I need a quest to acquire my robes and wands! The journey is as important as the accoutrements.
Lisa: That's why we must cross the Magic Station into Charmer's Market!
Homer: I'd ask questions about what you just said but honestly, I wouldn't understand your answers.
Task: Build Charmer's Market
Task: Make Springfielders Pretend They're Wizards
Time: 6s
Location: Charmer's Market
Task: Make Homer Mock Kids and Adult Kids
Time: 6s
Location: Charmer's Market
Comic Book Guy: I'm looking for a Magic Tap Ball doubles partner. Rough touch rules. BYOB: Bring Your Own Broom.
Martin: I like my stuffed owls just as ornery as the real ones! And I'm willing to trade my lunch money to procure it!
Milhouse: I cast “AMEX-O” with my dad's credit card to buy a bag of funky tasting jelly beans!
Homer: Honey, Bart should've come with us. He'd have a field day making fun of all these freaks.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
A Bull in a Magic Shop Pt. 3
Homer starts
Homer: Is this the last store? I can't walk another step unless you can cast a wizard spell on my aching feet.
Lisa: I promise this is the last stop. Besides, the wand is the most important piece!
Lisa: You must have a special bond with a wand. It must call to you. Some say it takes years to find a wand that-
Homer: *stare* Got it!
Task: Make Homer Drool Over Old Wand
Time: 6s
Location: Charmer's Market
Lisa: Dad, you can't just take it! That's pick-pocketing, or wand-pocketing, or something.
Homer: I'll pay for it. I'm just trying it out in my back pocket to see if it makes my butt look cool.
Homer: *snap*
Lisa: You just sat on it, didn't you?
Homer: Yeah, but how's my butt look?
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 1
Lisa starts
Lisa: Did you feel that?! The whole place shook when the wand snapped! Maybe that wand was a little more special than the others.
Homer: Is that a shot at my weight?
Lisa: I'm just saying that maybe that wand was a little more special than the others.
Homer: I hope it IS special. Half of it broke off inside me.
Homer: I think it's speaking to me, promising me donuts and wealth to buy more donuts.
Lisa: That's…a little unsettling. That also sounds familiar. Like I've read this before.
Task: Make Lisa Re-Read Angelica Button Series
Time: 6s
Location: Simpson House
Lisa: I think these books hold the clues to what happened back at Charmer's Market. I think it has to do with the Angelica Button-verse merging with Springfield!
Marge: Phew, okay. I'm just glad you're not drifting into Equalia again.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 2
Lisa starts
Lisa: Dad, I found out who owned that wand!
Homer: Great. Do you know if they have a lenient return policy?
Lisa: Forget returning it! Springfield merging with the magical world means the threat of Don't-Say-His-Name is real!
Homer: We shouldn't be afraid to call people by their given names.
Lisa: Don't-Say-His-Name is his given name!
Homer: Wow. His parents shoulda thought a little longer on that one.
Task: Build Magic Academy
Task: Make Homer Guess Name
Time: 6s
Location: Simpson House
On job start:
Homer: Maybe he just hates his name. I'll bet he got stuck with Eugene. God, I hate Eugene. I hate it so much!
Lisa: No, saying his name is what can lead him to us. And then he can use his powers to suck the essence out of everyone!
Homer: Sounds like Eugene has some issues.
On job end:
Lisa: Building a school to teach kids magic is a way to stop him… and his giant beasts.
Homer: I'd love to discuss these giant beasts but it's dinner time. So let's put a pin in it for now.
Quest reward: Wizard Lisa, Wizard Bart, Magic Act Milhouse, $100 and 10 XP
Magic Scratch-R
Auto start
Homer: Hey Apu, can I get a Scratch-R? My kid is obsessed with a fake magic school, and I'm going to need some real tuition money soon.
Apu: Why don't you try our new mystical and very supernatural Scratch-R?
Homer: Sweet magician's mojo, not you too, Apu?!
Apu: You know what they say: if you can exploit a fad for profit, do it!
System Message: Try your luck on the Magic Scratch-R during the Treehouse of Horror XXVIII event! Available now, at the Kwik-E-Mart!
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 3
Lisa starts
Marge: It's hideous! And nasty! Puberty sure messed with your magic friends, Lisa.
Troll 1: *picks nose*
Lisa: Those are goblins, Mom!
Bart: These are the bad guys you were so worried about? Big deal.
Lisa: Nah, goblins are like rodents. A little mystical, sure, but really kind of vanilla.
Task: Tap Mystical Pests
Homer: Is this the worst Eugene can throw at us? His mystical tricks are kinda lame.
Lisa: His name isn't Eugene! And he's only just begun to reveal his powers.
Homer: All I'm saying is, I've seen better magic tricks at a backyard Milhouse birthday party!
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 4
Homer starts
Homer: All this fear-mongering about mythical creatures makes me hungry. Must be part of their magic.
Kearneymon: Boo.
Homer: *munch* Ahhhhh! *munch*
Lisa: That's one of them! If only there was time to say I told you so!
Lisa: *waves wand* I cast “ENTRAP-O”!
Task: Place Kearneymon's Alley
Task: Make Lisa Try to Capture Kearneymon
Bart: Wow, all that wand waving and you didn't stop it from rampaging down Evergreen Terrace.
Lisa: But I did figure out how to drain the dark mana out of it. That's what keeps the beasts in Don't-Say-His-Name's control.
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 5
Lisa starts
Lisa: Chief Wiggum, this is getting out of control. Shouldn't the police be getting into this mess?
Wiggum: On foot patrol, I've stepped into a lot of messes. But the girl's right. These goblins are becoming a problem. We should escalate to excessive use of force already!
Martin: There aren't enough trained witches and wizards in Springfield to knock these pests down!
Wiggum: Ralphie came home from school with a wizard's hat… or maybe it was a dunce cap. I'm not sure.
Task: Place Magic Tower
Task: Use the Magic Tower
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 6
Lisa starts
Lisa: Mayor Quimby, as a founding member of your “Kids Council on Stuff”, I believe we have a real problem on our hands.
Quimby: Er, on our hands and on our shoes. These foul creatures are leaving behind globs of glowing golden flakes. If these globs turn into potholes, the voters will trash my Mayoral sash!
Martin: The goblins protect the gold in the Angelica Button-verse. They're guardians of their currency!
Comic Book Guy: Their nose snot is also worth a fortune at the Charmer's Market gift shop.
Quimby: A fortune, you say? Then I declare it a new Springfield currency!
Task: Craft an Item at Charmer's Market
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 7
Lisa starts
Lisa: How can you exploit these poor goblins for their boogers?!
Quimby: Extracting their nose gold is perfectly humane. Chief, I want you to dig deep into their skulls to get every last bit of goo.
Wiggum: Will do. And when we've de-boogered Springfield, we're off to Shelbyville and beyond.
Lou: Ah, we don't have that authority, Chief. Shelbyville is not an “open-carry” wand town.
Wiggum: You make me sick, Lou… always following the law.
Quimby: I'll draft some quick legislation. A license to carry in one place should work everywhere else.
Task: Tap Mystical Pests in Other Springfield
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 8
Skinner starts
Skinner: Why are the kids ripping branches off the trees on school property? They're making Willie cry.
Willie: They've stripped me trees more naked than a Scotsman's under-kilt!
Miss Hoover: We ran out of wands. Even in a fantasy setting our budget still sucks.
Ralph: My wand is leaking.
Miss Hoover: *sigh* All right children, there will be a special after-school class to explain what we've all just seen.
Task: Unlock Lewd
Task: Collect Wands
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 9
Lisa starts
Lisa: Great job, everybody! These mystical beasts weren't expecting us to fight back.
Martin: Marvelous! We're on our way to unraveling Don't-Say-His-Name's spell on these beasts.
Homer: Did you just say Don't-Say-His-Name?!
Martin: Maybe I did just say Don't-Say-His-Name or maybe I didn't just say Don't-Say-His-Name. Who's asking? What's your name?
Homer: Uh... I'm not sure.
Task: Capture Kearneymon
Task: Make Homer Keep Asking Whose Name Can't They Say
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Homer: I mean seriously, legally, can his parents even name him that?
Homer: When he's carded at Moe's what's on his driver's license?
Lisa: I'm not saying it! Read the books if you really want to know.
Homer: Unless it's a pop-up book and it pops up right in my eye, I'm not reading anything.
System Message: You have completed the Act 1 story! Keep expanding your Magic Academy and capturing Beasts, Act 2 starts soon!
Quest reward: 100 Event Currency and 20 XP
Wand Surplus
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Task: Collect Wands
Quest reward: 1/2/3 Donuts
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Hocus Bogus Pt. 1
Auto starts
Lisa: Alright, I think we're getting the hang of the capturing part. Juice boxes all around!
Martin: That's only half the battle. We need to train them to follow our commands.
Milhouse: What sort of commands?
Martin: To rip and tear our enemies apart like lions!
Milhouse: Any chance we could just nuzzle and lick them like sheep?
Task: Enchant Kearneymon
If the user has Ralph: Task: Make Ralph Sneak Some Juice
Time: 4h
Location: Wiggum House
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Hocus Bogus Pt. 2
Milhouse starts
Milhouse: This is kinda cool. We're like caretakers for these giant beasts. What should we feed them?
Lisa: Fairy dust. Ground coarsely, preferably. They'll get fussy if you don't serve it right.
Milhouse: My Mom says the stuff she sprinkles in my cereal is fairy dust. It makes me less fussy... and very sleepy.
Task: Make Willie Dig Up His Stock
Time: 4h
Location: Willie's Shack
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Hocus Bogus Pt. 3
Lisa starts
Lisa: Mom, part of the magic of going to a boarding school is living away from home!
Marge: I'm sorry, Lisa. Either you're staying at home with a curfew, or you're paying the cost of room and board away from home.
Lisa: Fine. I'll get a student loan... or better yet, maybe I can be a resident assistant. Ooh, I can be in charge of planning all the social events!
Task: Place Dormitory Tower
Task: Make Magic Academy Kids Skip Social Events
Time: 4h
Location: Dormitory Tower
Task: Make Lisa Be a Try Hard Resident Assistant
Time: 4h
Location: Dormitory Tower
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Hocus Bogus Pt. 4
Homer starts
Homer: Hey, it's that pimply-faced squeaky guy that serves me food everywhere. What are you doing at my house?
Squeaky Voice Teen: I'm here on behalf of the beast walking app Rawr to walk your dragon or other mythical creature.
Homer: You've got to walk them, too?! This is worse than having a kid!
Homer: Just see to it that they do their “business” in Flanders' yard.
Task: Summon Kearneymon
Time: 4h
Location: Kearneymon's Alley
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Hocus Bogus Pt. 5
Homer starts
Homer: I'm trying to ask an important question here, and everyone is busy monster hunting!
Lisa: What's your question?
Homer: What's the dude's name?! I need to know! I must know! I demand to know! Pleeeeeeeeaaaaasssssseeeee?
Task: Make Homer Plead to Know the Name
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Homer: What if we tried sign language? Or Morse Code? Or semaphore? Or Pawnee.
Lisa: You'd have to learn any of those.
Homer: D'oh! How ‘bout burping? I'm fluent in that.
System Message: You have completed the Act 2 story! Keep expanding your Magic Academy and enchanting Beasts, Act 3 starts soon!
Quest reward: 100 Event Currency and 20 XP
Mystical Beast Mania
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Task: Collect Fairy Dust
Quest reward: 1/2/3 Donuts
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Say His Name, Say His Name Pt. 1
Auto starts
Miss Hoover: We're short on toads again.
Skinner: Toads? We still dissect toads in magic school?
Miss Hoover: No, Transmogrification. These are Toad Princes... still with a penchant for eating flies.
Sherri and Terri: Our toad promised us riches if we help him get back to his realm. We're just not sure whether he means gold or more flies.
Task: Collect Toad Princes
If Hocus Bogus Pt. 4 wasn't completed: Task: Summon Kearneymon
Time: 4h
Location: Kearneymon's Alley
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Say His Name, Say His Name Pt. 2
Homer starts
Homer: I didn't want to do this. But, Lisa, if you don't tell me this guy's name, you're grounded.
Homer: We have rules in this house. And rule #1 is: no cowering in fear of some stupid name.
Lisa: Fine! If I write it down, will you just shut up about it?
Homer: I'll try. I can't promise. I'm told I have quite a mouth on me.
Task: Make Homer Read Name Out Loud
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Homer: Monty-mort. Montymort. Lord Montymort. Doesn't sound so terrifying to me.
Lord Montymort: *poof* How in the boiling cauldron did I get here?
Homer: Ah! Ah, the girl said your name!
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Say His Name, Say His Name Pt. 3
Lisa starts
Lisa: It IS you! The most despicable antagonist in the Angelica Button series! This is both frightening and really cool at the same time.
Lord Montymort: Silence, little girl. My monsters should have demolished this pathetic town by now. Slithers! What in the blazes is taking them so long?
Slithers: It appears it's become trendy to capture and train them, sss-sir. People and their exotic pets, you know?
Lord Montymort: Well, if my monsters won't do it, then it's up to their master. Doesn't anyone realize I have a magical-essence-sucking quota to meet?
Lord Montymort: I'll start with the portly oaf and the pesky girl that brought us here.
Lisa: Not if I can help it! I'll find your weakness! I have powers of my own!
Task: Place Magic Academy Ruins
Task: Make Lisa Search Books for Exploits
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Task: Make Homer Hide His Essence
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
The Vestige Pt. 1
Bart starts
Bart: So, how do we beat him? Guns? Knives? Age shaming?
Comic Book Guy: Or do we say his name backwards? Destroy a bunch of his cursed childhood trinkets?
Lisa: According to the books, it's none of those. It says the key to beating Montymort is…physically beat him.
Bart: That's why God created bullies!
Task: Make Springfielders Duel Montymort
Time: 4h
Time: Magic Academy Ruins
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
The Vestige Pt. 2
Lisa starts
Lisa: You can't win, Lord Montymort! We won't let you destroy our town.
Lord Montymort: You fools can't stop me! I've got a monopoly on magic. Time to tap into those resources now!
Homer: Of all the giant things to attack Springfield, this must be the weirdest and wrinkliest one.
Lisa: Enchanted beasts! Fight in the name of Springfield!... while I ignore the fact that I'm forcing mythical creatures to fight!
Task: Make Beasts Battle Montymort
Time: 4h
Time: Magic Academy Ruins
Kang: Foolish humans. You thought you could escape our menace for three seasons in a row? Prepare to di--
Kang: What in Rigellian Hell is going on down there?!
Kodos: No idea. We really have been away too long.
Kang: Let's bail. We know enough not to butt in on another invader's decimation of Earth.
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
The Vestige Pt. 3
Lisa starts
Lisa: The mystical beasts did it! He's knocked out cold.
Martin: Huzzah! We have beaten the evil Lord Montymort. His name has no power anymore! Montymort! Montymort! Montymort!
Lord Montymort: But it's annoying me.
Lord Montymort: You think I'm defeated that easy? I've got at least a trilogy's worth of untapped storyline left. You haven't seen the last of me!
Bart: Man, they always know how to drag these things out. Let's speed up his plot line.
Task: Defeat Lord Montymort
Lord Montymort: What have you done?! I feel as powerless as the middle-class's ability to enact policy change.
Lisa: Fighting us repeatedly burned your magical reserves up! We've finally beaten you!
Quest reward: Lord Montymort, 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
The Vestige Pt. 4
Homer starts
Homer: Woo hoo! We kicked the crap out of an old man!
Quimby: Lord Montymort, as judge, jury, defense, prosecutor, and inattentive audience, I find you guilty of trying to suck the magic out of everyone.
Lord Montymort: Do your worst! I've lived for centuries, through countless hellscapes… including fruit-flavored gum and fidget spinners.
Quimby: I hereby sentence you to three life sentences…
Lord Montymort: It will be a breeze.
Quimby: ...to be served out here in Springfield.
Lord Montymort: Nooo! Please, take my life instead. I beg of you!
Task: Make Montymort Serve His First Life Sentence
Time: 8h
Location: Springfield Penitentiary, Police Station or Brown House
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
The Vestige Pt. 5
Lisa starts
Lisa: Can we keep the Magic Academy?
Skinner: Another school would take from our school supply budget. We'd be forced to steal golf pencils and use triple-sided paper.
Lisa: What if we made it a for-profit school?
Lisa: We could use those profits to hire more teachers and create scholarships for the poor!
Quimby: Or fund a new parade convertible for this city's mayor?
Task: Make Springfielders Go Shopping at Charmer's Market
Time: 8h
Location: Charmer's Market
Task: Make Springfielders Pay to Attend Magic Academy
Time: 8h
Location: Magic School
Task: Make Lord Montymort Clean Up Beast Droppings
Time: 8h
Location: Kearneymon's Alley
Homer: Everything seemed better when I didn't know his name.
Homer: I know how to fix that—bang the old noodle into a steel pole. *BANG* *BANG*
Lisa: Dad, no!
Homer: Dad, who?
System Message: You have completed the event story! Keep expanding your Magic Academy and enchanting Beasts!
Quest reward: 100 Event Currency and 20 XP
Post-Magical Depression
Auto starts
Task: Collect Toad Princes
Quest reward: 1/2/3 Donuts
Happy Halloween 2017
Auto starts on October 31st at 11am GMT
Angelica Button: Why are all the Normies getting into costumes and traveling door to door?
Lisa: It's Halloween! Everybody dresses up to go around asking for candy.
Angelica Button: Sounds like panhandling to me. We've eradicated that in my universe.
Lisa: Really?! You've evolved as a society beyond these silly customs?
Angelica Button: No, we just sent all the panhandlers through an interdimensional portal to a mysterious place called “San Francisco”.
System Message: Happy Halloween! Instead of a trick, have some treats on us!
Quest Rewards: 10 Donuts
Auto starts
Lisa: I still need a wand, robe, an animal familiar, a couple books...
Homer: Heck no. I'm not wasting my “I'm-faking-a-sick-day” to take you costume shopping. Halloween is so far away it scares me. Eeeagggh! See. Scared.
Lisa: But if I don't start work on it now, it'll just be a dumb costume. I need cosplay grade or better this year.
Bart: Why are you trying so hard to impress the weird anime kids? And the weirder adults?
Lisa: If you ever become part of a real fandom, you'll understand.
Task: Make Lisa Use Fandom Powers to Annoy Homer
Time: 6s
Location: Simpson House
Requires: Homer
Lisa: There's even a new district called Charmer's Market in town that panders to everything I'm gushing about. Can we go? Can we? Can we?
Homer: No. Not in a million years. Not even if my Dad particles are teleported there and back... No!
Lisa: But they have a ton of junk food, just with stupid fancy-sounding names.
Homer: Sounds stupid-endous! And even dumb-licious!
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
A Bull in a Magic Shop Pt. 2
Homer starts
Homer: So, let's get this dress shopping over with. Where to? How ‘bout the nearest computer? You can buy things online, like a normie millennial.
Lisa: Where's the thrill in that? I need a quest to acquire my robes and wands! The journey is as important as the accoutrements.
Lisa: That's why we must cross the Magic Station into Charmer's Market!
Homer: I'd ask questions about what you just said but honestly, I wouldn't understand your answers.
Task: Build Charmer's Market
Task: Make Springfielders Pretend They're Wizards
Time: 6s
Location: Charmer's Market
Task: Make Homer Mock Kids and Adult Kids
Time: 6s
Location: Charmer's Market
Comic Book Guy: I'm looking for a Magic Tap Ball doubles partner. Rough touch rules. BYOB: Bring Your Own Broom.
Martin: I like my stuffed owls just as ornery as the real ones! And I'm willing to trade my lunch money to procure it!
Milhouse: I cast “AMEX-O” with my dad's credit card to buy a bag of funky tasting jelly beans!
Homer: Honey, Bart should've come with us. He'd have a field day making fun of all these freaks.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
A Bull in a Magic Shop Pt. 3
Homer starts
Homer: Is this the last store? I can't walk another step unless you can cast a wizard spell on my aching feet.
Lisa: I promise this is the last stop. Besides, the wand is the most important piece!
Lisa: You must have a special bond with a wand. It must call to you. Some say it takes years to find a wand that-
Homer: *stare* Got it!
Task: Make Homer Drool Over Old Wand
Time: 6s
Location: Charmer's Market
Lisa: Dad, you can't just take it! That's pick-pocketing, or wand-pocketing, or something.
Homer: I'll pay for it. I'm just trying it out in my back pocket to see if it makes my butt look cool.
Homer: *snap*
Lisa: You just sat on it, didn't you?
Homer: Yeah, but how's my butt look?
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 1
Lisa starts
Lisa: Did you feel that?! The whole place shook when the wand snapped! Maybe that wand was a little more special than the others.
Homer: Is that a shot at my weight?
Lisa: I'm just saying that maybe that wand was a little more special than the others.
Homer: I hope it IS special. Half of it broke off inside me.
Homer: I think it's speaking to me, promising me donuts and wealth to buy more donuts.
Lisa: That's…a little unsettling. That also sounds familiar. Like I've read this before.
Task: Make Lisa Re-Read Angelica Button Series
Time: 6s
Location: Simpson House
Lisa: I think these books hold the clues to what happened back at Charmer's Market. I think it has to do with the Angelica Button-verse merging with Springfield!
Marge: Phew, okay. I'm just glad you're not drifting into Equalia again.
Quest reward: $100 and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 2
Lisa starts
Lisa: Dad, I found out who owned that wand!
Homer: Great. Do you know if they have a lenient return policy?
Lisa: Forget returning it! Springfield merging with the magical world means the threat of Don't-Say-His-Name is real!
Homer: We shouldn't be afraid to call people by their given names.
Lisa: Don't-Say-His-Name is his given name!
Homer: Wow. His parents shoulda thought a little longer on that one.
Task: Build Magic Academy
Task: Make Homer Guess Name
Time: 6s
Location: Simpson House
On job start:
Homer: Maybe he just hates his name. I'll bet he got stuck with Eugene. God, I hate Eugene. I hate it so much!
Lisa: No, saying his name is what can lead him to us. And then he can use his powers to suck the essence out of everyone!
Homer: Sounds like Eugene has some issues.
On job end:
Lisa: Building a school to teach kids magic is a way to stop him… and his giant beasts.
Homer: I'd love to discuss these giant beasts but it's dinner time. So let's put a pin in it for now.
Quest reward: Wizard Lisa, Wizard Bart, Magic Act Milhouse, $100 and 10 XP
Magic Scratch-R
Auto start
Homer: Hey Apu, can I get a Scratch-R? My kid is obsessed with a fake magic school, and I'm going to need some real tuition money soon.
Apu: Why don't you try our new mystical and very supernatural Scratch-R?
Homer: Sweet magician's mojo, not you too, Apu?!
Apu: You know what they say: if you can exploit a fad for profit, do it!
System Message: Try your luck on the Magic Scratch-R during the Treehouse of Horror XXVIII event! Available now, at the Kwik-E-Mart!
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 3
Lisa starts
Marge: It's hideous! And nasty! Puberty sure messed with your magic friends, Lisa.
Troll 1: *picks nose*
Lisa: Those are goblins, Mom!
Bart: These are the bad guys you were so worried about? Big deal.
Lisa: Nah, goblins are like rodents. A little mystical, sure, but really kind of vanilla.
Task: Tap Mystical Pests
Homer: Is this the worst Eugene can throw at us? His mystical tricks are kinda lame.
Lisa: His name isn't Eugene! And he's only just begun to reveal his powers.
Homer: All I'm saying is, I've seen better magic tricks at a backyard Milhouse birthday party!
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 4
Homer starts
Homer: All this fear-mongering about mythical creatures makes me hungry. Must be part of their magic.
Kearneymon: Boo.
Homer: *munch* Ahhhhh! *munch*
Lisa: That's one of them! If only there was time to say I told you so!
Lisa: *waves wand* I cast “ENTRAP-O”!
Task: Place Kearneymon's Alley
Task: Make Lisa Try to Capture Kearneymon
Bart: Wow, all that wand waving and you didn't stop it from rampaging down Evergreen Terrace.
Lisa: But I did figure out how to drain the dark mana out of it. That's what keeps the beasts in Don't-Say-His-Name's control.
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 5
Lisa starts
Lisa: Chief Wiggum, this is getting out of control. Shouldn't the police be getting into this mess?
Wiggum: On foot patrol, I've stepped into a lot of messes. But the girl's right. These goblins are becoming a problem. We should escalate to excessive use of force already!
Martin: There aren't enough trained witches and wizards in Springfield to knock these pests down!
Wiggum: Ralphie came home from school with a wizard's hat… or maybe it was a dunce cap. I'm not sure.
Task: Place Magic Tower
Task: Use the Magic Tower
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 6
Lisa starts
Lisa: Mayor Quimby, as a founding member of your “Kids Council on Stuff”, I believe we have a real problem on our hands.
Quimby: Er, on our hands and on our shoes. These foul creatures are leaving behind globs of glowing golden flakes. If these globs turn into potholes, the voters will trash my Mayoral sash!
Martin: The goblins protect the gold in the Angelica Button-verse. They're guardians of their currency!
Comic Book Guy: Their nose snot is also worth a fortune at the Charmer's Market gift shop.
Quimby: A fortune, you say? Then I declare it a new Springfield currency!
Task: Craft an Item at Charmer's Market
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 7
Lisa starts
Lisa: How can you exploit these poor goblins for their boogers?!
Quimby: Extracting their nose gold is perfectly humane. Chief, I want you to dig deep into their skulls to get every last bit of goo.
Wiggum: Will do. And when we've de-boogered Springfield, we're off to Shelbyville and beyond.
Lou: Ah, we don't have that authority, Chief. Shelbyville is not an “open-carry” wand town.
Wiggum: You make me sick, Lou… always following the law.
Quimby: I'll draft some quick legislation. A license to carry in one place should work everywhere else.
Task: Tap Mystical Pests in Other Springfield
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 8
Skinner starts
Skinner: Why are the kids ripping branches off the trees on school property? They're making Willie cry.
Willie: They've stripped me trees more naked than a Scotsman's under-kilt!
Miss Hoover: We ran out of wands. Even in a fantasy setting our budget still sucks.
Ralph: My wand is leaking.
Miss Hoover: *sigh* All right children, there will be a special after-school class to explain what we've all just seen.
Task: Unlock Lewd
Task: Collect Wands
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Angelica Button and the Mystical Beasts Pt. 9
Lisa starts
Lisa: Great job, everybody! These mystical beasts weren't expecting us to fight back.
Martin: Marvelous! We're on our way to unraveling Don't-Say-His-Name's spell on these beasts.
Homer: Did you just say Don't-Say-His-Name?!
Martin: Maybe I did just say Don't-Say-His-Name or maybe I didn't just say Don't-Say-His-Name. Who's asking? What's your name?
Homer: Uh... I'm not sure.
Task: Capture Kearneymon
Task: Make Homer Keep Asking Whose Name Can't They Say
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Homer: I mean seriously, legally, can his parents even name him that?
Homer: When he's carded at Moe's what's on his driver's license?
Lisa: I'm not saying it! Read the books if you really want to know.
Homer: Unless it's a pop-up book and it pops up right in my eye, I'm not reading anything.
System Message: You have completed the Act 1 story! Keep expanding your Magic Academy and capturing Beasts, Act 2 starts soon!
Quest reward: 100 Event Currency and 20 XP
Wand Surplus
Auto starts
Task: Collect Wands
Quest reward: 1/2/3 Donuts
------------------------
Hocus Bogus Pt. 1
Auto starts
Lisa: Alright, I think we're getting the hang of the capturing part. Juice boxes all around!
Martin: That's only half the battle. We need to train them to follow our commands.
Milhouse: What sort of commands?
Martin: To rip and tear our enemies apart like lions!
Milhouse: Any chance we could just nuzzle and lick them like sheep?
Task: Enchant Kearneymon
If the user has Ralph: Task: Make Ralph Sneak Some Juice
Time: 4h
Location: Wiggum House
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Hocus Bogus Pt. 2
Milhouse starts
Milhouse: This is kinda cool. We're like caretakers for these giant beasts. What should we feed them?
Lisa: Fairy dust. Ground coarsely, preferably. They'll get fussy if you don't serve it right.
Milhouse: My Mom says the stuff she sprinkles in my cereal is fairy dust. It makes me less fussy... and very sleepy.
Task: Make Willie Dig Up His Stock
Time: 4h
Location: Willie's Shack
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Hocus Bogus Pt. 3
Lisa starts
Lisa: Mom, part of the magic of going to a boarding school is living away from home!
Marge: I'm sorry, Lisa. Either you're staying at home with a curfew, or you're paying the cost of room and board away from home.
Lisa: Fine. I'll get a student loan... or better yet, maybe I can be a resident assistant. Ooh, I can be in charge of planning all the social events!
Task: Place Dormitory Tower
Task: Make Magic Academy Kids Skip Social Events
Time: 4h
Location: Dormitory Tower
Task: Make Lisa Be a Try Hard Resident Assistant
Time: 4h
Location: Dormitory Tower
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Hocus Bogus Pt. 4
Homer starts
Homer: Hey, it's that pimply-faced squeaky guy that serves me food everywhere. What are you doing at my house?
Squeaky Voice Teen: I'm here on behalf of the beast walking app Rawr to walk your dragon or other mythical creature.
Homer: You've got to walk them, too?! This is worse than having a kid!
Homer: Just see to it that they do their “business” in Flanders' yard.
Task: Summon Kearneymon
Time: 4h
Location: Kearneymon's Alley
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Hocus Bogus Pt. 5
Homer starts
Homer: I'm trying to ask an important question here, and everyone is busy monster hunting!
Lisa: What's your question?
Homer: What's the dude's name?! I need to know! I must know! I demand to know! Pleeeeeeeeaaaaasssssseeeee?
Task: Make Homer Plead to Know the Name
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Homer: What if we tried sign language? Or Morse Code? Or semaphore? Or Pawnee.
Lisa: You'd have to learn any of those.
Homer: D'oh! How ‘bout burping? I'm fluent in that.
System Message: You have completed the Act 2 story! Keep expanding your Magic Academy and enchanting Beasts, Act 3 starts soon!
Quest reward: 100 Event Currency and 20 XP
Mystical Beast Mania
Auto starts
Task: Collect Fairy Dust
Quest reward: 1/2/3 Donuts
------------------------
Say His Name, Say His Name Pt. 1
Auto starts
Miss Hoover: We're short on toads again.
Skinner: Toads? We still dissect toads in magic school?
Miss Hoover: No, Transmogrification. These are Toad Princes... still with a penchant for eating flies.
Sherri and Terri: Our toad promised us riches if we help him get back to his realm. We're just not sure whether he means gold or more flies.
Task: Collect Toad Princes
If Hocus Bogus Pt. 4 wasn't completed: Task: Summon Kearneymon
Time: 4h
Location: Kearneymon's Alley
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Say His Name, Say His Name Pt. 2
Homer starts
Homer: I didn't want to do this. But, Lisa, if you don't tell me this guy's name, you're grounded.
Homer: We have rules in this house. And rule #1 is: no cowering in fear of some stupid name.
Lisa: Fine! If I write it down, will you just shut up about it?
Homer: I'll try. I can't promise. I'm told I have quite a mouth on me.
Task: Make Homer Read Name Out Loud
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Homer: Monty-mort. Montymort. Lord Montymort. Doesn't sound so terrifying to me.
Lord Montymort: *poof* How in the boiling cauldron did I get here?
Homer: Ah! Ah, the girl said your name!
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
Say His Name, Say His Name Pt. 3
Lisa starts
Lisa: It IS you! The most despicable antagonist in the Angelica Button series! This is both frightening and really cool at the same time.
Lord Montymort: Silence, little girl. My monsters should have demolished this pathetic town by now. Slithers! What in the blazes is taking them so long?
Slithers: It appears it's become trendy to capture and train them, sss-sir. People and their exotic pets, you know?
Lord Montymort: Well, if my monsters won't do it, then it's up to their master. Doesn't anyone realize I have a magical-essence-sucking quota to meet?
Lord Montymort: I'll start with the portly oaf and the pesky girl that brought us here.
Lisa: Not if I can help it! I'll find your weakness! I have powers of my own!
Task: Place Magic Academy Ruins
Task: Make Lisa Search Books for Exploits
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Task: Make Homer Hide His Essence
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
The Vestige Pt. 1
Bart starts
Bart: So, how do we beat him? Guns? Knives? Age shaming?
Comic Book Guy: Or do we say his name backwards? Destroy a bunch of his cursed childhood trinkets?
Lisa: According to the books, it's none of those. It says the key to beating Montymort is…physically beat him.
Bart: That's why God created bullies!
Task: Make Springfielders Duel Montymort
Time: 4h
Time: Magic Academy Ruins
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
The Vestige Pt. 2
Lisa starts
Lisa: You can't win, Lord Montymort! We won't let you destroy our town.
Lord Montymort: You fools can't stop me! I've got a monopoly on magic. Time to tap into those resources now!
Homer: Of all the giant things to attack Springfield, this must be the weirdest and wrinkliest one.
Lisa: Enchanted beasts! Fight in the name of Springfield!... while I ignore the fact that I'm forcing mythical creatures to fight!
Task: Make Beasts Battle Montymort
Time: 4h
Time: Magic Academy Ruins
Kang: Foolish humans. You thought you could escape our menace for three seasons in a row? Prepare to di--
Kang: What in Rigellian Hell is going on down there?!
Kodos: No idea. We really have been away too long.
Kang: Let's bail. We know enough not to butt in on another invader's decimation of Earth.
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
The Vestige Pt. 3
Lisa starts
Lisa: The mystical beasts did it! He's knocked out cold.
Martin: Huzzah! We have beaten the evil Lord Montymort. His name has no power anymore! Montymort! Montymort! Montymort!
Lord Montymort: But it's annoying me.
Lord Montymort: You think I'm defeated that easy? I've got at least a trilogy's worth of untapped storyline left. You haven't seen the last of me!
Bart: Man, they always know how to drag these things out. Let's speed up his plot line.
Task: Defeat Lord Montymort
Lord Montymort: What have you done?! I feel as powerless as the middle-class's ability to enact policy change.
Lisa: Fighting us repeatedly burned your magical reserves up! We've finally beaten you!
Quest reward: Lord Montymort, 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
The Vestige Pt. 4
Homer starts
Homer: Woo hoo! We kicked the crap out of an old man!
Quimby: Lord Montymort, as judge, jury, defense, prosecutor, and inattentive audience, I find you guilty of trying to suck the magic out of everyone.
Lord Montymort: Do your worst! I've lived for centuries, through countless hellscapes… including fruit-flavored gum and fidget spinners.
Quimby: I hereby sentence you to three life sentences…
Lord Montymort: It will be a breeze.
Quimby: ...to be served out here in Springfield.
Lord Montymort: Nooo! Please, take my life instead. I beg of you!
Task: Make Montymort Serve His First Life Sentence
Time: 8h
Location: Springfield Penitentiary, Police Station or Brown House
Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10 XP
The Vestige Pt. 5
Lisa starts
Lisa: Can we keep the Magic Academy?
Skinner: Another school would take from our school supply budget. We'd be forced to steal golf pencils and use triple-sided paper.
Lisa: What if we made it a for-profit school?
Lisa: We could use those profits to hire more teachers and create scholarships for the poor!
Quimby: Or fund a new parade convertible for this city's mayor?
Task: Make Springfielders Go Shopping at Charmer's Market
Time: 8h
Location: Charmer's Market
Task: Make Springfielders Pay to Attend Magic Academy
Time: 8h
Location: Magic School
Task: Make Lord Montymort Clean Up Beast Droppings
Time: 8h
Location: Kearneymon's Alley
Homer: Everything seemed better when I didn't know his name.
Homer: I know how to fix that—bang the old noodle into a steel pole. *BANG* *BANG*
Lisa: Dad, no!
Homer: Dad, who?
System Message: You have completed the event story! Keep expanding your Magic Academy and enchanting Beasts!
Quest reward: 100 Event Currency and 20 XP
Post-Magical Depression
Auto starts
Task: Collect Toad Princes
Quest reward: 1/2/3 Donuts
Happy Halloween 2017
Auto starts on October 31st at 11am GMT
Angelica Button: Why are all the Normies getting into costumes and traveling door to door?
Lisa: It's Halloween! Everybody dresses up to go around asking for candy.
Angelica Button: Sounds like panhandling to me. We've eradicated that in my universe.
Lisa: Really?! You've evolved as a society beyond these silly customs?
Angelica Button: No, we just sent all the panhandlers through an interdimensional portal to a mysterious place called “San Francisco”.
System Message: Happy Halloween! Instead of a trick, have some treats on us!
Quest Rewards: 10 Donuts
