I agree with your point, but the good news is flying sucks anyway. You're not missing anything. Just ignore them as best you can, is my advice.
The only BF with good fun flying where you didn't need to be a flightsim enthusiast to enjoy it was BF1.
The planes in that were a simple joy to fly and were actually well 'connected' to the battle. You could actually assist with objectives and there was real jeopardy from AA and even LMG users to keep it exciting. Fun and not unbalanced.
In BF6, as with any BF with jets, the flying is pretty much just attack run, fire counter measures, fly away until counters recharge, repeat.
(Yes, I have played them in previous BFs just to prove I could master it and to do the associated challenges, but they are awful).
And for any other player it's just random unavoidable annoying death from above.
My advice: If you want to play jets, go get a combat flightsim. It will do a better job and won't mean thousands of players on the ground sending you hateful vibes.