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"DarthAndy;c-1850143" wrote:

"USAFmedic129;c-1849997" wrote:

"DarthAndy;c-1849860" wrote:
Last big thing - inflicts fear
Next big thing - immune to fear, gives courage
Next big thing - monkeys with courage and gets stacks of...let's say pancakes.
Next big thing - eats those pancakes

Do they even try anymore?

Imagine if all this was leading up to a porkins meta
It would be glorious :smiley:

Other than the new gear you'd need that is. 150 napkin salvage

Jek Porkins: Hot Dog champion. Eats more hot dogs than Joey Chestnut.

Fast Food: at the start of turn, Jek will attempt to open a bag of Cheetos. Success = a dazing hit. Failure = Jek is dazed and confused for 1 turn.

McDonalds: Jek will double fist a large drink and a Big Mac, if successful the enemy team will be dumbfounded. Failure causes friendly team to throw their hands up in disgust.

Stay on Target: A donut rolls onto the field which Jek blindly follows. If the path of the donut goes through the enemy line, enemies bumped by Jek will fall down incapacitated for 1 turn. If Jek is unable to catch the donut he returns to the line hungry. -50% attention span.

Eject! Eject! If Biggs or Wedge are part of the team, Jek gets an extra turn due to insulin boost from Wedge. Jek may become blinded by French fries in the cockpit causing him to crash and burn.
Zeta: why would you waste one on this guy?