Make me laugh for eggs!!

Sorry MOD. :D

2 Morons are talking. The one says

Moron 1: Hey, do you know time is money?
Moron 2 quickly runs to the nearest store and buys 1.000.000 clocks

I laughed so hard :P

rolybert7 wrote:
I have a crapload of eggs to give away but you have to make me laugh. Post something funny!! I will pick 4 winners on Sunday and give em out.

Right now I have 4600 eggs.


If you PM me you will not be eligible(so don a you a pm a me :mrgreen: Bad Italian accent :mrgreen: ) and I will also be watching the egg scamm threads. If your name comes up dont bother with this contest. Guilty or not!

Two dyslexic men walk into a bra.

What's the difference between Arjen Robben and time? Time passes.

A man is dining in a fancy restaurant, and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He had been checking her out since he sat down, but lacked the nerve to talk with her.

Suddenly she sneezes and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.

"Oh my, I am so sorry," the woman says as she pops her eye back in place. "Let me buy you dessert to make it up to you."

They enjoy a wonderful dessert together, and afterwards, the woman invites him to the theater followed by drinks. After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap...and stay for breakfast the next morning.

The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed! Everything has been incredible!

"You know," he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?"

"No," she replies...

... "You just happened to catch my eye!"

mltomei478

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

And god said to John "come forth and receive eternal life"

But John came fifth and ended up with a toaster.

this is my second post here so don't have to count it in, but in the spirit of funny things I just came across this which I found very hilarious :D poor thing..

http://veryhilarious.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/static-electricity-cat.jpg



Ps. thanks Sherryt07 for reposting my youtube video with embedding :wink:

Blonde at ATM:

Blonde behind her: Your code is ****

Blonde : No, it's 7426!