Am I cursed or something?

This game might be prime example of my Control/Deathmatch experience. I am no pro, or anything, but this team balancing is something I encounter in 7-8 out of 10 games in these modes. I went afk to watch some Youtube after I took this ss and the game ended 32 - 21 for enemy team... I wouldn't mind this at all if it everything in Apex wanted so fixated on team score and win or lose if at least dm was actually DEATHMATCH. Do you have **bleep**ty experience or did someone curse my account 😂 btw this Wraith left almost instantly or did they since it had usual xp farmign jumbled name. Btw I am really asking a question just to check if I cursed or sth, spare me pointless GIT GUD, SKILL ISSUE etc comments 😅