I have a pretty high tolerance for lackluster romance (hence why I'm still chasing Lucanis even despite it all).
I suspect that Veilguard is what Dragon Age II wanted to be, given more proper development time. The friend/romance progression feels a lot to me like Dragon Age II, except with so much more content to bloat the time between new companion scenes. I like the side quest content, generally, but the bloat can make it feel like you never really get to talk to your companions, and all NPC arcs stagnate for weird amounts of in-game time. When you add the fact that the convo wheel has been removed in favor of Awkwardly Standing In Someone's Room, it really feels like Rook rarely gets to talk to their companions.
A lot of those things are probably too large to fix. I wish all of the romances had been treated with more care, but having to fight against silly RP calls to engage with one of the tamest, least built romances in the game feels extra bad. If Hardened Lucanis wasn't locked off, I could at least imagine the drama of the two reconciling after his loss in Treviso.
"Awkwardly Standing In Someone's Room"
The worst mechanic ever introduced in a video game, ever. It's bad enough when the character is alone in their space; it's doubly uncomfortable when there are 2 companions standing together. I found myself feeling really weird just casually walking by to overhear the conversation, and this is a video game and these people aren't even real. But it was still a visceral discomfort. Like, it's not good manners. Rook wasn't invited to these conversations.
A few spoilers ahead, don't read if you're still experiencing story:
For example, the conversation with Harding and Emmrich about their camping trip. It's cute, but I had already gotten the lock in scene with her by that point, and there was a portion in the dialogue where she says something about not worrying because the of the camping trip she's planning with Rook. Which of course, isn't a real thing, doesn't happens. But I felt like an intruder, she's more interested in spending time alone with Emmrich than Rook. And throws Rook a crumb almost as an afterthought.
Then there's Taash. I had an irrational irritation whenever I saw them together, and in at least one case it was even justified. Harding's mother sends Taash cookies or something, so it's clear they have come up in those letters Harding is always writing. There's no evidence Harding has even TOLD her mother about Rook, at least, I couldn't find a single codex where she acknowledges they are even friends much less in a relationship.
And then there's the continued flirting between those two, and Taash telling Harding to let them know if Rook "doesn't treat her right" or whatever. Taash is a literal adolescent and I can't believe that's Rook's serious competition with Harding. What does Harding do? Just giggles, because she giggles at literally EVERYTHING Taash says.
It's like the developers didn't even like their own main character, because all the story revolves around other characters interactions with one another. And if they didn't like Rook, I think that explains why so many folks have reported feeling disconnected from Rook as well.
I'm glad they didn't get nominated for GOTY. They HAVE to learn some lessons from this. We can't depend on just Larian to deliver us these rich, interactive experiences.
