"CathyTea;14909085" wrote:
I can use some encouragement and suggestions!
I think I want to discover how I feel... so first, I'll just share.
I'm in my second year of blogging. The first year was so intense, so full of inspiration, and so fast! I posted nearly every day, with nearly 500 posts during the first year! I never ran out of energy to post, and somehow, every day, I found the time to write! I must have written over 500,000 words!
Now, this second year... things are slower. I'm in a challenging astrological transit until Octoberish, which seems to slow down and restrict my creativity, my expressions, my inspiration, and my understanding of my aesthetic values.
Ok... so now I've just discovered how I feel, which is "slowed down and restricted." (The specific transit is Saturn conjunct Natal Moon/opposite Natal Venus, for those of you who think in terms of astrological energy.)
And now that I've discovered how I feel, I'd love some advice, suggestions, encouragement, and sharing!
How can I make the most out of this time of slowing down and feeling restricted, so that by the time I come out of this epoch in late October, I will feel that I've gained from it?
How have you profitably used and grown from your own times of creative slowdown and restriction?
I'm in a slowish period of my writing for certain things (*cough cough* KFLL and my offline fantasy novel), although in other areas, I'm full-speed ahead. I think this is because the pieces that have deeper meaning, the ones I connect to, are the ones I want to spend the most time on making sure it's right and good and quality. I'm feeling restricted partly due to my own fault - like not playing Kass's game in one case or not giving myself the time to sit down and write my fantasy novel. Part of it is also due to lack of passion, drive, and inspiration.
Do you ever look at a draft, outline, piece of writing, and you know what's coming up ahead, but you just don't feel motivated to write it because a) it may be overwhelming, b) you're a perfectionist, like me, and struggle with letting something just flow, or c) it just isn't coming despite the pre-planning you've done?
This is how I feel now about both pieces of writing I mentioned. I find myself questioning a lot - "Is it any good?"
My husband made an interesting point lately. He asked me where and when and how I feel most inspired, where I feel in tune to my imagination and creativity hub, and where I hear my own writing voice the loudest? I told him usually when I'm out in nature and listening to music, and typically carrying a journal with me. Then he asked me: "When's the last time you took your journal and your music and walked out into nature?" I looked at him like he was crazy, but it really was a "duh" moment for me.
So that morning, I didn't waste any time. I drove up the mountain, feeling called and compelled to go into nature and to meet myself - or my inner voice. I found myself on a long, winding road through a state park, and was completely lost and turned around. After seven miles, I pulled over and tried to get my GPS to work so I could figure out where I was and figure out how to get back down again. That's when I looked over and saw the trailhead sign which literally said, "Realization Point." I felt like I was suddenly struck by a lightning bolt of understanding.
See sometimes my slow periods or dry periods in writing is like this winding road up the mountain.
The mountain represents the impossible peak that I'm never quite sure I'll reach.
The road is my journey to getting there, of course, and sometimes this road is obstructed (like when some pinecones fell off the tree into the road or a biker and a curve blocked me from passing.
I need to identify those barriers, and sometimes I have to wait them out like waiting for the biker to move around the corner so I can see again and safely pass. Sometimes I need to plow right through... sorry pinecones.
The important point is I need to keep going, keep trying, keep driving.
I don't need to use everything I write. I can discard it. I can save it for later. I can use it as a growth piece.
Sometimes I need to walk away from the road and pursue something else, like hiking up a nearby trail (a.k.a. watch a movie, read a book, listen to music, go for a walk, etc). Sometimes this hike away from the "writing road" takes longer than I'd like, but if I keep my eyes open, I might find something beautiful and inspiring anyway (like when I was on this particular hike and I found a gorgeous open field with a dilapidated barn and I sat down on a bench to ponder its beauty). Did it give me a story idea? No. But it did clear my mind and bring me a sense of peace which later helped me to write my story.
Eventually I'll hit realization point - a point where I recognize that I don't need a GPS to find a quiet place in the mountains or the Sims game to write Kass's story and I don't need the perfect words for my novel to be written, a point where I let go of my restraints (fears, barriers, worries) and just write and trust that something meaningful will come if I try and nothing meaningful will come if I never try. Some of the work will be c.r.a.p. and some of it will be decent and some of it will be good and some of it might be great. I can't get to decent, good, or great if I don't try. The point is I'm working through it, actively and intentionally, and sometimes taking much needed breaks which can be just as intentional.
There is meaning in the pause and in the rest. Sometimes in order to find yourself (or your writing voice) you might just have to lose yourself "in the woods." Your voice and your mind (and your spirit) need to rest in order to be refreshed and back at your personal best.
I do this by finding my "happy place" or my "peaceful haven" or finding the things I love the most and doing them (like walking up a mountain listening to my music and carrying my journal).
This was most definitely longer than I intended, but I hope this helps, @CathyTea.
