Autonomous toddler care is so frustrating!

Infants and toddlers are the same I find. Constantly having to cancel "check infant/toddler" from their queue only to have them queue it again on their own. Go to the loo cause you're gonna pee yourself? nope check toddler instead, have something to eat cause you're gonna starve? nope check toddler cause it's crying in the high chair or it's hungry cause it threw its food on the floor from the high chair. Two parents - "no put the kid down cause mum's got this, no OK looks like dad's got this, no okay then just leave them on the floor then or put them in the crib and get them out again over and over!! 🙄. My game usually goes have newborn till it ages up into infant, make cake add candles age up to toddler add candles age up to child. I'm running with the base game child mechanics I dont own any packs for parenting. Definitely need some adjustments to autonomy.