I haven't played infants yet, so can't really say anything about them.
I've gone through quite a few toddlers, and the way I manage is to not let caretakers take care of them at all, except baths and a bit of social. My tots are busy having fun and learning all day, between taking care of needs. I always have food in the fridge for them, and I drag the plate out so the little ones can help themselves. I always also have a night light so they can sleep well all night.
Have to mention, I usually only play Independent toddlers, maybe also Angelic. They are easiest to handle by far. Independent tots don't even need potty training. Also have to mention, I let MCCC tuner take care of the pointless "Check toddler" interaction, meaning caretakers won't autonomously drop everything to "check on toddler" constantly. Sims are not smarter this time around, and certainly not around their offspring.
