Sliders and presets reset on male Sim

whenever i make a male sim (and its only a male sim, female sims are completely fine) everything is fine in create a sim (let me note that this is when i press new game to make a household) i pick a season, choose a lot and the sims image is fine and looks normal. then i load into the lot and all the sliders and presets are reset.

 basically same sim but his features have changed into some default guy's one. i tested on sims with no hair, skin details, clothes etc and it still happened. obviously when i remove my mods it goes away.
- i saw other people with the same problem and it turned out to be miko's eye presets which i hadnt used so i removed them from my mods folder and the same thing still happened to my male sims.

i used mc command centre to paste his original features onto him and it worked, he looked fine until i left the lot and came back and it was back to that glitch.

im wondering if anyone has sliders / presets that caused this and any fixes? i have quite a big preset folder and tried to do a 50/50 but it seems to be multiple things.