So everyone, I found a pretty long and teidious option. so, basically I removed everything and even unmerged CC.
Put them all in a separate folder. and then what I did was use sims 4 studio (which was finally updated thank god) to fix said issues with mods and even update said cc/mods due to the infant/get together update. so, if I were you guys download sims 4 studio the latest one here *snip*
and just go to batch fixes -> CAS -> update all CAS cc -> add your mods folder -> then click run. then repeat this process but except click on whatever issue else you have on your game. like updating pets cc, disallowing cc, etc..
If that doesn't work, I found out it could be a household issue. meaning, you can't play any household it's best to ofc save the household to the library, (if you can stil go to CAS) and then, delete them from the houses. then, re-do those households and see if they work. all of these worked for me and while it was teidious and took all day because I have a *-ton of CC lmao, it was so worth it. now I can play this again.
(CM: Edited to remove link to modded content. Please review this thread for more on mod links and AHQ)